Seperating from Husband

[Proserpina]

He did nothing? I thought he watched the child while you worked?

Wasn't that the reason why he didn't have a job? Because he was a SAHD?

 

[Ohiogal]

Wasn't that the reason why he didn't have a job? Because he was a SAHD?

That is what I thought. On the plus side, dad will most likely move on to the PERFECT mother who will be more than happy to parent s4e's child. Karma.

 

[MCDATX]

Wow, I just read S4E's history...this CAN'T be a real person! Can it!???
How scary.

 

[LdiJ]

You do realize that you deserve the digs that you are getting, don't you?

That being said, I am sorry that your bubble has burst, because I know that it hurts. No one ever wants to have made that big of a mistake.

You honestly don't have a basis for supervised visitation unless your stbx chooses to roll over and play dead on the issue...and he possibly may do that if he really isn't interested in his children of his own volition.

 

[TheGeekess]

Enough crow.... You won't get him on supervised visitation, but I will give you some links that will help you help yourself (even though you have been a troll extraordinaire). And remember: You can't make silk purses out of sows' ears.

Self-help legal resources

For those who want to consider filing an action in court on their own, below is a list of resources. These sites have forms and instructions, which include forms for legitimation and visitation.

Family Division - Superior Court of Fulton County This is the site of the Fulton County Superior Court Family Division's Family Law Information Center. Any resident of the State of Georgia can visit the center in person at its location. The address is 185 Central Avenue, Atlanta, Ga.30303. The phone is 404-335-2789. One can receive a free, brief legal consultation with an attorney by calling and making an appointment. However, a non-custodial parent must follow the guidelines of the county with legal jurisdiction over his/her particular legal issues.

Family Law Information Center This is the site of DeKalb County Superior Court's Family Law Information Center. Any DeKalb resident or person with a family law issue related to DeKalb County can visit the center at its location at 120 West Trinity Place, Decatur, Ga. 30030. The phone is 404-687-3990. Brief, legal consultations with an attorney are available for $10 by calling and making an appointment.

Cobb County Government This is the site of the Cobb County Superior Court Family Law Workshop. Any Cobb resident or person with a family law issue related to Cobb County can visit the center at 30 Waddell Street, Marietta, Ga. 30090. The phone is 770-528-1812. The workshop is free of charge and provides answers to basic questions about divorce, paternity/legitimation, contempt, and modification cases.

Family Law This is the site of the Dougherty County Superior Court Law Library. Any Dougherty resident or person with a family law issue related to Dougherty County can visit the center at its location at 225 Pine Avenue, Room 212, Albany, Ga. 31702. The phone is 229-431-2133. The library manager, who is an attorney, is available to provide assistance with conducting research, finding appropriate materials and possible legal resources, suggesting self-help resources, and answering legal reference questions in person or by e-mail. However, the library manager is not permitted to give legal advice or interpret specific legal situations.

Northeastern Judicial Circuit Family Law Information Center and Guardian ad Litem Program - Hall County, Georgia This is the site of the Hall and Dawson County Superior Court Family Law Information Center. Any Hall or Dawson resident or person with a family law issue related to Hall or Dawson Counties can visit the center at its location at 225 Green Street, S.E., Gainesville, Ga. 30501. The phone is 770-531-2463. Brief, legal consultations with an attorney are available at no cost in Dawson County. However, a financial qualification is required for attorney consultations in Hall County.

Appalachian Family Law Information Center This is the site of the Appalachian Family Law Information Center serving Fannin, Gilmer, and Pickens counties. Any Fannin, Gilmer or Pickens resident or person with a family law issue related to these counties can visit the center at its location at 1 Broad Street, Suite 102 A, Ellijay, Ga. 30540. The phone is 706-299-1444. Brief, legal consultations with an attorney are available by appointment for income-qualified individuals.

LegalAid-GA This site is a project of the Atlanta Legal Aid Society, the Georgia Legal Services Program and the Pro Bono Project of the State Bar of Georgia. It is a guide to free legal information and services including the topics of legitimation, visitation, and custody.

A list of the Georgia Superior Court Clerks for every county is on this web site: GSCCCA.org - Georgia Superior Court Clerks' Cooperative Authority.
Child Access & Visitation

 

[Proserpina]

Wow, I just read S4E's history...this CAN'T be a real person! Can it!???
How scary.

In all fairness it's not often someone can find it within themselves to not only admit their mistakes but then eat crow and ask for help from the same group of people who have - let's be honest - pretty much ridden her ragged since she joined the boards.

Nobody is glad when someone's heart gets broken even if it was inevitable.

 

[Ohiogal]

In all fairness it's not often someone can find it within themselves to not only admit their mistakes but then eat crow and ask for help from the same group of people who have - let's be honest - pretty much ridden her ragged since she joined the boards.

Nobody is glad when someone's heart gets broken even if it was inevitable.

I will agree. It sucks to get your heart broken and truthfully S4E doesn't deserve pain. No one does. However, hopefully she learns from the situation and if she wants help she should start with the links The Geekess has given her. Then come back and ask questions. And quite frankly she might consider writing a heartfelt apology to Kim for her behavior.

 

[stepmom4ever]

I will agree. It sucks to get your heart broken and truthfully S4E doesn't deserve pain. No one does. However, hopefully she learns from the situation and if she wants help she should start with the links The Geekess has given her. Then come back and ask questions. And quite frankly she might consider writing a heartfelt apology to Kim for her behavior.

Thank you I will use the links given to me to start......

He was a stay at home dad because I allowed it. I put up with taking care of him and all expenses. I regret all of this and I wouldn't know where to start with writing Kim a letter......I recall her saying to me that I will loose the most when the truth comes out...I never ubderstood what she meant but now I do..... What would I say to a women that was treated unfairly in the first place? Thanks all of you for your help

 

[Proserpina]

Thank you I will use the links given to me to start......

He was a stay at home dad because I allowed it. I put up with taking care of him and all expenses. I regret all of this and I wouldn't know where to start with writing Kim a letter......I recall her saying to me that I will loose the most when the truth comes out...I never ubderstood what she meant but now I do..... What would I say to a women that was treated unfairly in the first place? Thanks all of you for your help

This isn't legal advice (obviously!).

"Kim,

I know there is very little I can say to take away any of the pain I've caused you in the past. It's only now that I truly understand how wrong I was and I deeply regret that and I'm ashamed of treating you so poorly.

When you wrote to me, you showed me dignity and grace and I wasn't able to recognize it then - I do now, and I wanted to thank you for trying to help me see what was really happening.

I am truly sorry, Kim, and though I know it doesn't change anything I wanted you to know that.

Yours,

Me"

****

(I dunno. Words to that effect, maybe? I agree - there's not much you can say. But you can say something - just be honest with her)

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Thank you I will use the links given to me to start......

He was a stay at home dad because I allowed it. I put up with taking care of him and all expenses. I regret all of this and I wouldn't know where to start with writing Kim a letter......I recall her saying to me that I will loose the most when the truth comes out...I never ubderstood what she meant but now I do..... What would I say to a women that was treated unfairly in the first place? Thanks all of you for your help

I hope you realize since DAD has been the primary parent, GUESS who would probably qualify as the custodial parent? He's been good enough up until now to take care of kiddo; what has changed since last week? last month?

You see, my X did get supervised visits. But I can equivocably say that my X did NOT EVER take care of the child when I was not there. Hey, I can say that he did NOT take care of the child when I was there. He slept all day and was up all night. He also was on medication that made the judge agree that supervised was appropriate for the child.

By you allowing dad to take care of the child while you went to work, well, if dad fights you, you can look at being NCP and paying support.

PS - that dirty rotten scoundrel of a man provided half the genes of your child. Are you going to say that kiddo that half of him/her is rotten because he/she got genes from dad?

 

[>Charlotte<]

I will agree. It sucks to get your heart broken and truthfully S4E doesn't deserve pain.

If I turn the stove burner on high, and people keep telling me not to touch it because it's hot, and I know what heat is and can see how hot it is but I touch it anyway because I'm too damned stubborn to admit it's going to burn me, I deserve to get burned.

Yes, SM4, you do deserve it. You ignored every single indication of what kind of man he is, which even strangers on a message board could see. You brought a child into this world and told that child "Here, I chose this worthless loser to be your father." You harassed a woman who paid the same price you are now paying for letting this creep into your life. The scenery on your current path isn't very pretty, but you chose the path. You have to walk it, you can't back up now.

You also, however, deserve to make wiser decisions in your future and to benefit from that wisdom. You need to grow up and drop the hypocrisy. Supervised visitation is for parents who need supervision, not because you suddenly decide you don't like him anymore.

Accept the unchangeable fact that this man is your child's father, find a way to make the best of your situation, grow up, and start using your brain.

 

[LdiJ]

This isn't legal advice (obviously!).

"Kim,

I know there is very little I can say to take away any of the pain I've caused you in the past. It's only now that I truly understand how wrong I was and I deeply regret that and I'm ashamed of treating you so poorly.

When you wrote to me, you showed me dignity and grace and I wasn't able to recognize it then - I do now, and I wanted to thank you for trying to help me see what was really happening.

I am truly sorry, Kim, and though I know it doesn't change anything I wanted you to know that.

Yours,

Me"

****

(I dunno. Words to that effect, maybe? I agree - there's not much you can say. But you can say something - just be honest with her)

I would also add:

I know that you probably don't want to consider this at this point, but our children are siblings and deserve to know each other. I don't know how well dad will facilitate that, but I hope that if dad doesn't do it, that you and I can make peace with each other enough to make sure that our children know each other.

 

[Proserpina]

I would also add:

I know that you probably don't want to consider this at this point, but our children are siblings and deserve to know each other. I don't know how well dad will facilitate that, but I hope that if dad doesn't do it, that you and I can make peace with each other enough to make sure that our children know each other.

I'd thought about that but given the history....well, if it were me, I'd want to have time to digest the first letter before being asked about siblings, y'know?

Either way though any heartfelt gesture would be a start.

 

[LdiJ]

I'd thought about that but given the history....well, if it were me, I'd want to have time to digest the first letter before being asked about siblings, y'know?

Either way though any heartfelt gesture would be a start.

Ah but see...the first sentence acknowledges that Kim may not want to consider it. The second sentence acknowledges that dad may or may not make it happen. The third sentence indicates that if dad doesn't, then hopefully they can.

That puts it all off in the future and Kim, who has shown some decent graciousness, will have plenty of time to think about it. It would also show a second layer of maturity on the OP's part.

My daughter and the mother of my granddaughter's sister (4 months apart) were typical drama queens for quite some time...and quite frankly, dad just ate it up.

I am very proud of the two of them for not only realizing that the two sisters needed to have a relationship, but that the two of them could really help each other out and be friends.

 

[CJane]

All I'm going to say is that I find it HIGHLY unlikely that Dad will attempt primary custody, or that he'll even put up much of a fight for visitation - unsupervised or otherwise.

Also, SM4E, you'd be best served to just LISTEN to us right now. He will NOT pay you child support. Ever. Count on that and ensure that you can support your child 100% without ANY assistance at all from him EVER.