Adoption and TPR

[Regina phalange]

PA: DH and I were adopting a baby from my best friend's younger sister. 3 weeks into the adoption she changed her mind and kept the baby. (Baby spent 5 weeks detoxing from methadone in the NICU) She told us at the time that the baby's dad wouldn't sign so she couldn't.

Mom and Dad are both heroin addicts. Mom's whole family thought she made a bad decision as she abandoned her first child who is 10 now. Long story short she isn't allowed to see either kid and is in jail (only got out last March) and bio Dad has the baby. He knows he's not able to raise her (he has another g/f who just had a baby as well) and was considering going through with the adoption but CYF is involved and wants the baby to stay with Mom.

If Dad still wants to go through with the adoption, can we still move forward and try and do Mom involuntary? He advised us that it was her that refused to sign and he felt he had no choice but to go along, even though he thought she shouldn't be raising a baby. Thanks and sorry for the not-so-short story!

 

[Silverplum]

PA: DH and I were adopting a baby from my best friend's younger sister. 3 weeks into the adoption she changed her mind and kept the baby. (Baby spent 5 weeks detoxing from methadone in the NICU) She told us at the time that the baby's dad wouldn't sign so she couldn't.

Mom and Dad are both heroin addicts. Mom's whole family thought she made a bad decision as she abandoned her first child who is 10 now. Long story short she isn't allowed to see either kid and is in jail (only got out last March) and bio Dad has the baby. He knows he's not able to raise her (he has another g/f who just had a baby as well) and was considering going through with the adoption but CYF is involved and wants the baby to stay with Mom.

If Dad still wants to go through with the adoption, can we still move forward and try and do Mom involuntary? He advised us that it was her that refused to sign and he felt he had no choice but to go along, even though he thought she shouldn't be raising a baby. Thanks and sorry for the not-so-short story!

Do you have an attorney? You'll need one, no question.

I'm unsure if you have standing to file TPR on Mom, but perhaps you do: http://www.splas.org/da-adop-invol-term.html

It doesn't matter what her family thinks. What matters is the law. Good luck to you.

eta: Love the username!

 

[Proserpina]

PA: DH and I were adopting a baby from my best friend's younger sister. 3 weeks into the adoption she changed her mind and kept the baby. (Baby spent 5 weeks detoxing from methadone in the NICU) She told us at the time that the baby's dad wouldn't sign so she couldn't.

Mom and Dad are both heroin addicts. Mom's whole family thought she made a bad decision as she abandoned her first child who is 10 now. Long story short she isn't allowed to see either kid and is in jail (only got out last March) and bio Dad has the baby. He knows he's not able to raise her (he has another g/f who just had a baby as well) and was considering going through with the adoption but CYF is involved and wants the baby to stay with Mom.

If Dad still wants to go through with the adoption, can we still move forward and try and do Mom involuntary? He advised us that it was her that refused to sign and he felt he had no choice but to go along, even though he thought she shouldn't be raising a baby. Thanks and sorry for the not-so-short story!

If CYF is involved and actually want to reunite the child with Mom, there's at least a decent chance of that being the end result.

This is so heartbreaking for you, I know, but I think you do need to know there's a risk of that happening. While CYF's involvement and preferences aren't necessarily the final word on the subject they do carry an awful lot of weight.

I echo, wholeheartedly, SilverPlum's advice to get an attorney as soon as is humanly possible.