Adoption ?

[45Frank]

What is the name of your state? Divorced in NJ. Live now in NC.
Ok here goes. I have custody of our two children, 14 and 9. Mother since divorce in 2001 has seen them less then 10 times, two weekends and maybe 7-8 single days. Less then 15 days total.
I may remarry soon and adobtion has come up, the new wife is awsome and would do so.
I am sick. We haven't heard from the X in a year and that was a 30 second call. No birthday cards, christmas cards nothing. We don't know where she lives, rumors are in LasVegas who knows. She owes $15,000.00+ in child support is wanted in several counties in several states by the law. We at least once a year are bombarded by calls from detectives from county and state prosecutors offices and such.
What are the chances of adoption and what state. I have started by tring to have the case moved to family court in NC but NJ court stated until I can show proof of her residence I will be denied. i showed that even their own county prosecutors office can't find her how am I.
Thanks

 

[momofrose]

You are jumping the gun a bit - first you are not even married to gf and second when you may get married, you have to be married for a couple of years.

d

 

[casa]

What is the name of your state? Divorced in NJ. Live now in NC.
Ok here goes. I have custody of our two children, 14 and 9. Mother since divorce in 2001 has seen them less then 10 times, two weekends and maybe 7-8 single days. Less then 15 days total.
I may remarry soon and adobtion has come up, the new wife is awsome and would do so.
I am sick. We haven't heard from the X in a year and that was a 30 second call. No birthday cards, christmas cards nothing. We don't know where she lives, rumors are in LasVegas who knows. She owes $15,000.00+ in child support is wanted in several counties in several states by the law. We at least once a year are bombarded by calls from detectives from county and state prosecutors offices and such.
What are the chances of adoption and what state. I have started by tring to have the case moved to family court in NC but NJ court stated until I can show proof of her residence I will be denied. i showed that even their own county prosecutors office can't find her how am I.
Thanks

There is a procedure for filing and for attempting to locate the other parent before the court's will allow you to Domesticate the order &/or file for adoption.

Please peruse NJ "Abandonment" guidelines...typically states require NO contact (which sometimes means no actual contact, and also no support for X amount of time- anywhere from 6 mos to 2 yrs depending on your state). When filing abandonment, you would go through the process of 'attempting to locate' the other parent...once you fulfill that requirement, THEN Marry, you are on your way to beginning to file for a step-parent adoption.

This really should be done with an attorney as you are dealing with parent you can't locate and jurisdiction issues.