Child support for his ex and me

[JEZZIBELL]

What is the name of your state? Florida

Hello,

I recently broke up with my boyfriend and the father of my 2 year old and baby on the way. He also has 2 children from a previous marriage that he pays $240 a week in child support for. I am in the process of applying for child support and want to know if what his ex-wife gets from him will affect how much I will wind up getting? Do I need to hire a lawyer to have her child support modified so it is fair for both sets of children? Or will the courts automatically adjust this (I'm guessing not)? I know that they can't take more than 60% of his earnings for child support and she has almost exhausted this due to the fact he claimed the bare minimum when they figured out their salaries. Which is my second question. I know that he makes more than what he will wind up claiming he makes (he's a truck driver and only claims his day rate, not all of the other things he gets paid for each day) I have copies of his paycheck stubs, can I use these as proof his income is higher or will the courts order him to show his tax returns for proof of his income?

I appreciate all of the advice you can give.

 

[CourtClerk]

YOU cannot modify her child support order. The courts will decide the CS amount according to Florida CS statutes, but my guess is that she will continue to get her $240 week. It's not her fault the ex decided to be irresponsible and keep making babies ad nauseum.

 

[mommyof4]

The child support as ordered IS fair to the first children. How would it be fair for them to go without just because you and their father decided to have 2 more children? It works that way in in tact families, too. If you can't afford another child, then don't have one.

Have all income documentation ready to present for YOUR child support order. Don't even get your hopes up that her child support will be lowered.

 

[>Charlotte<]

YOUIt's not her fault the ex decided to be irresponsible and keep making babies ad nauseum.

Nor is it her fault that OP decided it was a good idea to have kids with someone who was already on the hook for his first children.

Which is something you should keep in mind, Jezzibell. Every time the thoughts "it's not fair!" or "what about my children?" pop into your head, make sure you also remember "I chose to have these children" and don't complain too much.

 

[CourtClerk]

Nor is it her fault that OP decided it was a good idea to have kids with someone who was already on the hook for his first children.

Which is something you should keep in mind, Jezzibell. Every time the thoughts "it's not fair!" or "what about my children?" pop into your head, make sure you also remember "I chose to have these children" and don't complain too much.

I didn't want to jump down her throat too bad this early in the morning about how idiotic a statement that was... or how this is all her fault in the first place (thanks Clt and mommyof4)

These young girls don't think. They simply don't think and yes, I can tell by reading it that the OP is young. I'm getting ready to go to work now to see just how bad CP's and NCP's spoiled Christmas for their children and end up on ex parte's today.

 

[CourtClerk]

Just wondering what the OP will think when loverboy goes off and makes 2 more babies and then that flavor of the month decides she needs to have the OP's CS order modified.

This is like a battle of she has more cereal than me in her bowl.

 

[JEZZIBELL]

I don't think I'm that young....28 and he's 32....old enough to "think" I'm making the right decisions. I did not want to have an abortion for either of them, morally I am against it. understand your point of "she has more cereal than me", and I know the courts don't go on case by case basis, other wise I may have validity to having her child support lowered. (longer story than I care to type) He screwed me bad and why should I have to carry 95% of the financial weight when it was 2 people that chose to make a baby..or two babies in this case?

Will getting a lawyer help me in any way or will I be wasting my money?

Also, one question was never answered.....Will the courts request his tax documents to show exactly how much money he does make?

 

[mommyof4]

Just wondering what the OP will think when loverboy goes off and makes 2 more babies and then that flavor of the month decides she needs to have the OP's CS order modified.

This is like a battle of she has more cereal than me in her bowl.

Well, since she wants to make sure the CS is fair for ALL of the children (and at the rate he is going, that may be quite a bunch of babies), surely she would just willingly volunteer to lower her child support to donate to the newest members of the family.

 

[mommyof4]

I don't think I'm that young....28 and he's 32....old enough to "think" I'm making the right decisions. I did not want to have an abortion for either of them, morally I am against it. understand your point of "she has more cereal than me", and I know the courts don't go on case by case basis, other wise I may have validity to having her child support lowered. (longer story than I care to type) He screwed me bad and why should I have to carry 95% of the financial weight when it was 2 people that chose to make a baby..or two babies in this case?

Will getting a lawyer help me in any way or will I be wasting my money?

Also, one question was never answered.....Will the courts request his tax documents to show exactly how much money he does make?

You need to get this through your head. YOU will NEVER have any standing to have any input on her CS order. Ever. You are not a party to the order. Frankly, it's none of your business.

I suggest you get used to the fact that you purposely created 2 human beings with this man. (Once is a surprise, twice is a pattern). Even once a CS order is in place (and btw, as the 2nd child is not even here, yet, that child will NOT be included in the CS at this point. As far as he is concerned, legally he only has 1 child with you and that is IF he is the legal father. If not, you get to establish paternity, too.), I strongly suggest that you accept the fact and responsibility for supporting the children yourself. Yes, legally he will be obligated to help support them (note the key word "help"), but that does not always translate into what is reality.

YOU made this choice. The fact that you are 28 and put yourself and your children in this sticky situation doesn't make your actions any better. In fact, at 28, you should know better.

Oh, and I did answer your question. I told you to have any and all income documentation on hand to present.

 

[JEZZIBELL]

Still not answered......Will the courts request his tax documents to show exactly how much money he does make?

Yes, I put myself in this position, but he made the baby too! Why should it be allowed for him to skirt around the system to bypass being responsible and help financially raising HIS children also?

He may as well go to McDonalds and get a $6 job so he can sit and home and just keep making babies and not take responsibility?

I know that you are not the law and that you are only trying to give advice, and I'm not trying to change what you have told me. I do appriciate what you have said. I just don't want to be made out to look like a floosey here. I thought I found my match and that we were going to have a family together. I guess I was the dumb one for thinking I could do that. I just don't want to end up with tax payers helping care for my children when their father should take responsibility and I'm just looking for help how to get there.

Thank you.

 

[JEZZIBELL]

I had said I have paycheck stubs...not tax records....

I asked if the courts will request his tax records to prove his income.

 

[>Charlotte<]

Yes, I put myself in this position, but he made the baby too! Why should it be allowed for him to skirt around the system to bypass being responsible and help financially raising HIS children also?

It's not allowed. He is expected to be financially responsible for his legal children. But you're stuck with whatever income he has, or at least what can be proven in court. Because he's already paying child support to someone else, his income is less. It's simple math.

The reason it's a bigger problem for you than it is for him is because you have the children. He's going to have to worry about surviving himself on what little he has left, but you're going to have to worry about raising children on what little he can provide. Your other recourse is to give him custody of the children.

 

[JEZZIBELL]

So in closing....his ex won the child support lottery and I got the dollar scratch off.

His two other children live in filth while their mother tramps around in designer clothes (I know the courts don't care what she does with the money and I'm showing my immaturity here...sorry) My children will be loved in poverty until I can "win the lottery"

There is something really messed up with the legal systems in our county.

Thank you for your time.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Tax returns are used.

Here is the website to approximate what you'll receive:
http://dor.myflorida.com/dor/childsupport/guidlines.html

http://www.leg.state.fl.us/statutes/index.cfm?App_mode=Display_Statute&Search_String=&URL=Ch0061/SEC30.HTM&Title=->2000->Ch0061->Section%2030

 

[Silverplum]

So in closing....his ex won the child support lottery and I got the dollar scratch off.

His two other children live in filth while their mother tramps around in designer clothes (I know the courts don't care what she does with the money and I'm showing my immaturity here...sorry) My children will be loved in poverty until I can "win the lottery"

There is something really messed up with the legal systems in our county.

Thank you for your time.

What do you expect "the legal systems" to DO about your situation?

Can "the government" make an appointment with you, because they *know* you are dating a potential deadbeat, a man who doesn't make enough cashola to pay for 4 or more kids? Then "the government" would tell you that you are making a poor financial choice to reproduce with a low wage earner and man who does not have a track record of great relationships.

Then what would you do? Be happy that "the government" meddled in your personal life? Be happy that taxes are high enough to pay social workers and therapists to probe into citizens' private lives to ensure good reproductive choices? What would be the penalty for ignoring the advice?

Really.