Child Support - Stop Paying?

[gml659]

What is the name of your state? Washington

What happens if I stop paying child support? What is the worst that can happen?

Why?

Over the years the x has bad-mouthed me endlessly to my children. Every one of the 30 or so stipulations in our PP she has broken. She alienated me from my children. I love and loved these children but to no avail she "won".

Now being that I have not seen the children in awhile he says it is a lost cause to go to court. Plus the youngest is 15 so he cannot be forced to have a realtionship with me. On a up note I was beggining to have a good realtionship with my kids again after 2 yrs not seeing the 15yo and 1 yr of not seeing the 17yo. Yet, this thing has be cycleable for year and I believe she is at it again thrashing me to the kids. I have never trashed her.

What do I do again when these kids decide I am an A-Hole again? I feel that stopping the $1,500/mo CHSUP would put leverage on my money loving x. I won't stop permanently. Just a month at first. I KNOW this is VERY dirty pool.....VERY DIRTY. I am desperate and tired of playing the CHUMP to these people.

So what is the worst that can happen? Just pay it? Interest? A record? Debit the money from my pay check? Will I have to pay her legal expenses? Will the judge take into account my motive for what I did? Anything else?


GML

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

You seem to believe that your familial situation and child support are somehow tied together; i.e., "If she trashes me, and my kids don't like me, well, I'll teach them a lesson that they'll soon NEVER forget!"

Is that your thought?

Believe me, if you think your familial situation has ANYTHING to do with your court ordered child support payments, then you'll be the one being "taught" a thing or two by the court. It's called "Contempt of Court" which can mean heavy-duty fines and/or jail time.

So, you had better get your mind straight - - real quickly!

IAAL

 

[gml659]

OK. What can I do about her Contempt of Court? Why is it my attorney is saying, "too bad". Why can't she be "punished" monetarily for violating EVERY provision in our PP? Why does EVERYTHING with the courts boil down to $$$$? You told me what I should NOT do ---- what SHOULD I do to get my kids back?

GML

 

[coosi]

OK. What can I do about her Contempt of Court? Why is it my attorney is saying, "too bad". Why can't she be "punished" monetarily for violating EVERY provision in our PP? Why does EVERYTHING with the courts boil down to $$$$? You told me what I should NOT do ---- what SHOULD I do to get my kids back?

If you don't pay CS you will be in contempt and can go to jail. Period. So you have to play the legal game and keep taking her to court for contempt every time she violates the court order. What do you mean by get your kids back?

PS
If you don't like your lawyer, get another one!

 

[BL]

We don't know why your Lawyer is telling you "too Bad", but if the other Party is in fact violating the order they are in contempt. If the other Parent is Denying your visitation, file contempt of that Order.
Then go file For CS Modification. Child Support awards can be suspended during the time of denial of Visitations.

You don't need your Lawyer to do that, but If you have a Lawyer remind them they are to represent your interest and you expect them to do their Job.

I will only say, If you feel Like Stopping CS , you will drive a bigger wedge between you and you children.

I was an SOB by my children when I file court papers. I then wrote my children a Letter, stating why I filed, under what Laws, and IT wasn't nothing to personally to do with them. I still love them. They are all grown, the mess blew over, and I do have some kind of a relationship with them.

Be the Big guy chill out do what you have to legally, including paying CS, Don't attack your X personally , just based on the Law in court papers,and write your kids a heart felt letter. They won't forget it.

 

[gml659]

She bad mouthed me SO BAD that my youngest boy refused to see me for two and a half years 12yo - 15yo. My oldest for a year. (I never ever bad-mouthed her......NEVER). My attorney is a good attorney and not the only one I talked to. They all said the same thing. The judge is not going to force someone over 12yo, an adolescent, to relate to me. To have visitation. They all said that there was no form of monetary punishment they could do to her because this is not a monetary manner. Keep in mind she violated EVERYONE of our PP stipulations.......all 30+ of them. They even said the court would not even force the boys and I to go to group counseling due to their "mature" ages. So I pay the $1,500 a month and get called "F-You" when I called them.

On an up note over the last six months the boys ARE coming to see me....about once a month. They are cordial, polite, respectful. This has happened before though. Now my ex is getting a divorce from their step dad. A step dad they hated. I think they were only being nice to me because step dad demanded discipline.....which I agree with. I think they were contemplating moving in with me.....which would have been GREAT!!! OK. Step Dad is gone and liberal parent mom is the only one there. They will now go back to their old lifestyles of staying up late, internet porn....doing what they want as Mom pops another Prosac. She will start bad-mouthing me again. They will love their bachelor life style with their Mom and blow me off again. I can see it happening.

My oldest is sucking up to me because he wants me to pay for college. A natural human inducement of seeing the ole, "you rub my back, I will rub yours" thing.....I see no problem in this. Yet, this inducment will too end because the wife will get a court order for me to pay for college and then my son will be back to calling me by the name he is most familiar of me....."F-You". Someone forced to pay the support of an adult....imagine that (see my other post on this). THANK YOU WASHINGTON STATE!!!!!


GML

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Are you even reading what we're telling you? I don't think so. You have ONE agenda, and it's to complain.

You keep repeating the same crap, and it's tiresome. Stop repeating! If you have something new to say, then fine - - say it!

You're beginning to sound like a little, whiny, spoiled, school girl.

Get with the program, will you?

IAAL

 

[gml659]

Always,

Just don't read my posts.....this is your option. If you choose to be insensitive to my issues this is your option also. I will not get into a flame with you. I will take on board what you have posted and try to be less emotional. Think back to the most traumatic event in your life....multiply by 10 and then square that.....this is where I am at.

If you choose to be insensitive to me I will answer by not answering. Constructive....OK. There is a fine line between constructive and insensitive...you are to the right of it IMO.

GML

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Like I said - -

"Believe me, if you think your familial situation has ANYTHING to do with your court ordered child support payments, then you'll be the one being "taught" a thing or two by the court. It's called "Contempt of Court" which can mean heavy-duty fines and/or jail time.

"So, you had better get your mind straight - - real quickly!"


. . . and, just like the court, we don't care about, nor to we want to read, your "whining" and whimpering. We read it once and, if we need to remind ourselves of your familial plight, we'll read it again. But, your whining and whimpering about your ex, and your children, have NOTHING to do with your court orders.

This is a "Legal Site". It's NOT a "Dear Abbey" site. If you want a pillow and a warm blanket of "understanding", then go there or to Dr. Phil's site.

IAAL

 

[MBMom]

Your situation sounds like it sucks, and I can understand how emotionally draining these things can be, but IAAL is right...all you're doing is complaining. They have all given you some good advice, and you should be channeling your energy (and anger) into what to do next. If you're looking for sympathy, that's one thing you may not get here. I thought my situation was bad, but after reading a lot of posts about things others are going through...I'm ready to do what I need to do to keep my situation from getting worse. Each day it takes everything I have to get out of bed, go to work and continue taking the steps I need to take regarding my custody case due to the emotional stress it's caused on me, my ex and especially my son.

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My further response:

These statements are from your other thread. Your wrote them. Read them. Understand them.

"I totally agree with ALL of you. It IS a jerky thing."

"I knew someone would judge me a jerk. I would too if I were reading this."


IAAL

 

[BL]

And each poster is going through multiple 10's Christ sake man, your not the only one.

You know your X bad mouths you that's why the kids do. Now go scream on the Mountain ( not here ), then get some class and Be the better of the 2 of the 2 .

Ya see it's all falling around her, now is your chance. Don't speculate what's going to happen because If that's how you approach it , that will be the outcome.

Be a DAD !!! Period ..

 

[coosi]

Re Mom and contempt and $$

You know if she's found in contempt you can ask for HER to pay court and lawyer fees.

 

[gml659]

All good stuff. ALL taken onboard. Thank You all. I also apologize if need be.


GML

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

I also apologize if need be.

My response:

It "need be". Your thread, as well as your crybaby whining and whimpering, were totally exhausting!

Do you see how short your posts can be when you leave out all of the repetitive nonsense?

IAAL