Contacting HIS attorney?

[BethIam]

What is the name of your state? VA

My retainer fee is spent and I am wondering if it is okay for me to contact my ex's attorney myself? We are currently in the middle of drawing up a visitation schedule that works. My attorney is busy, and like I said, the money I've given is about used up. Can I simply "call" his attorney myself? I am tired of waiting around to hear what's going on with MY CASE. My attorney & his, seem to have a communication problem. I really feel like if I just contacted this guy myself, we could make some serious progress in resolving this. Is this wrong to do?

 

[brisgirl825]

What is the name of your state? VA

My retainer fee is spent and I am wondering if it is okay for me to contact my ex's attorney myself? We are currently in the middle of drawing up a visitation schedule that works. My attorney is busy, and like I said, the money I've given is about used up. Can I simply "call" his attorney myself? I am tired of waiting around to hear what's going on with MY CASE. My attorney & his, seem to have a communication problem. I really feel like if I just contacted this guy myself, we could make some serious progress in resolving this. Is this wrong to do?

I would think that his atty talking to you directly could be seen as a conflict of interests. Perhaps someone else here has a different take on it.

 

[BethIam]

I know what you mean, it just seems "wrong" somehow. Even so, I am tempted....But won't do it unless I find out for sure that it's okay.

 

[brisgirl825]

I know what you mean, it just seems "wrong" somehow. Even so, I am tempted....But won't do it unless I find out for sure that it's okay.

Are you and the ex on friendly enough terms to hash this out just between the two of you? Or perhaps splitting the cost of a mediator could help as well.

 

[BethIam]

I have zero problems communicating with him. It's insane to me that we have attorneys. But....he is one of these guys who is controlled by his wife and refuses to talk to me at all, unless she is able to hear what is being said...Yes, I'm serious.....No, it doesn't matter that our only reasons for talking would be our child. As a matter of fact, he told me today that I am only to call HER cell phone if I need to speak to him. I needed to speak to him because his visitation with our child is on Friday for the entire weekend. She has a project due on Monday, and I wanted him to be aware of what still needs to be done. I called his cell yesterday morning, left a message, saying that I needed to speak with him about our child and this weekend, could he please call me. He didn't call until this evening, and it was from her phone. He has promised her that he will never again speak to me for any reason, unless she is with him.

 

[brisgirl825]

I have zero problems communicating with him. It's insane to me that we have attorneys. But....he is one of these guys who is controlled by his wife and refuses to talk to me at all, unless she is able to hear what is being said...Yes, I'm serious.....No, it doesn't matter that our only reasons for talking would be our child. As a matter of fact, he told me today that I am only to call HER cell phone if I need to speak to him. I needed to speak to him because his visitation with our child is on Friday for the entire weekend. She has a project due on Monday, and I wanted him to be aware of what still needs to be done. I called his cell yesterday morning, left a message, saying that I needed to speak with him about our child and this weekend, could he please call me. He didn't call until this evening, and it was from her phone. He has promised her that he will never again speak to me for any reason, unless she is with him.

Oh, one of those huh? Well, as I said, perhaps taking this to mediation would be best. It should be cheaper than an atty and the mediator is an unbiased party who would help hash out differences.
I have gone to mediation when I moved out-of-state and it worked well.

 

[stealth2]

Since you're both represented by attorneys - that's who communication goes through. His lawyer wouldn't even take your call.

 

[BethIam]

Thanks guys..

Okay, that makes sense. I really didn't think it was proper, but you never know.

As far a mediation goes, how do I go about asking for that? I also have heard about C0-parenting classes being ordered by a Judge? What does that entail? I think this is something that my daughter would benefit from us doing. I am just tired of her father putting her at the very bottom of his priority list. His main concern is keeping his psycho wife happy, no matter how rediculous or petty her requests are. He thinks it is perfectly normal for her to insist he never speak to me unless she is able to "listen in."

 

[brisgirl825]

I am not sure about that. When I was divorced and when I moved, both times it was COed. In Ks, it's automatic to go through mediation before the courts get involved. It was also ordered that we pay half of mediation and that we both attend a "Parenting After Divorce" seminar.

Perhaps someone here will give you info on how to get it started.