does she have a say?

[1_wikked_angel]

What is the name of your state?undefinedWhat is the name of your state? Ohio
My boyfriends soon to be ex wife of 9 years is trying to stop him from bringing his son around me. Does she have a say in this? Him & I are planning on getting married once everything is over with. She has no reason for keeping me away from the son other then hate & hurt! Please help me!!!

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Well, let's see now. Since the two of them are not yet divorced there can only be a temporary custody order in place, if that. And since you didn't say anything about that, I have to assume there is not.

So, based solely on the lack of facts in your post, the ONLY person who does not have a say in this matter....hummmmm, let me guess....is YOU!

 

[1_wikked_angel]

No, there has been no temporary custody issued as of yet. hmmmm.......a touchy subject for you?

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Hmmmmmm no. But you could have saved yourself a lot of time by doing a search on this site for the answer. We deal with this topic at least 20 times a day and the answer would have been very easy to find.

Until there is a custody order, EITHER parent has the same rights. And you have absolutely no standing even with a custody order.

 

[1_wikked_angel]

You didn't even help answer the question.......the question was, can she stop him from bringing his son around me? She's filed papers with an attorney to do so.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

YES! Is that plain enough? In fact, she doesn't even have to let pops see the child. Not until there is a custody/visitation agreement in place.

 

[MBMom]

Just out of curiosity, how long have you and him been together? He's not even divorced yet and he's already considering marrying again?

 

[1_wikked_angel]

We've been together for almost a year. It wasn't an "extra marital affair" either. We met after they seperated. We don't plan on marrying for at least another year

 

[BelizeBreeze]

It wasn't an "extra marital affair"

No, you're right on that count. It WASN'T ... but it IS now. Remember, you slapping sheets with a married man has consequences. And One of them you're dealing with now.

Get used to it. It's called D.I.V.O.R.C.E.

 

[1_wikked_angel]

Yes....you're right, I sure am dealing with it now. I just feel bad for the son, as he's the one who is suffering. We're 2 hours away from where his son lives & my boyfriend works 7 days a week. I just find it rather selfish on her behalf to keep the boy away from his father because of jealousy over me. The childs the one she's hurting!

 

[BelizeBreeze]

And what would you call it if the child comes to visit dad and he's working all the time? Remember, you have no rights in this situation. And if dad works 7 days a week, then the child will be with you NOT dad.

You're best chance to deal with this is to tell soon to be hubby to make a choice: Money or his son. Because people don't change their ways. And what he did to his ex he'll do to you eventually.

Or to his son.

 

[stealth2]

Then perhaps the selfless thing for you to do is allow Dad to have his time with the boy by stepping back on those days? Wouldn't that be the easiest and most obvious solution?

 

[1_wikked_angel]

for your info..... he's on a swing shift..... He would get to spend time with his son. sounds like somebody has been burned.....BAD. You really shouldn't judge people you don't know. Karma has it's way People come in this forum with questions....hoping to find some answers.... not to deal with insecure, smart mouthed people as yourself

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Meow!!!!!

 

[MBMom]

Stealth is absolutely right! If the only thing stopping him from seeing his son is YOU, then maybe YOU should be the bigger person and step out of the picture during his visitation so that he CAN see his son. You're so concerned about him seeing his son...sounds like a simple solution to me. If you're not willing to step back, then maybe this guy should make you. By allowing this to happen, he's basically showing that you are more important than his son, so not only is his mom hurting him, Dad is helping!