fathers rights,gaining custody

[samson hejl]

What is the name of your state?ohio my babys mother and i have made a verbal agreement to shered parenting, one has are 2yr 3 days aweek, while the other has him 4 days. She is now leaving him with me past her days no phone calls, no explantion. I didnt sign the birth c but i did take a pt and our son has my last name.She claims she is the only one with custody, 1st how do i attain residential custody, and how do i go about with visitation. we were unmarried, and have not gone to court?

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

Well unless you do go to court you have no rights. According to the law you are a legal stranger to this child. You weren't married, your name is not on the BC have no court order so you have nothing. If you want to get custody then you will need to go to court establish paternity and do what everyone else does file for custody.

 

[samson hejl]

reply

he carries my last name does that mean anything?

 

[lonelyandsad]

doesnt mean anything

nope.you need to establish paternity first,as his babygirl suggested,then go to court,otherwise you may ending up paying 18 yrs of support for a child thats not yours.as of now,youre not the father,your name on the bc doesnt mean anything.

 

[lonelyandsad]

sorry bout that!

sorry,i rushed thru your post.untill you go to court,she can come back and get the baby,and theres nothing you can do about it.untill theres a court order,she has sole legal custody.

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

No I am sorry that doesn't help. You can put whatever name you want on the BC. Legally you are a stranger to that child and have no rights until you get yourself down to that court house and file.

 

[samson hejl]

please respond

i did take the paternity test a yr ago he is my son, at this point can i even request medical treatment? what ways do i go about gaining custody of my son? His mother works nights and lives with her father, his girlfriend and her three children

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

Oy ok was the DNA testing court ordered? You still need to go to court and file either way. Your best bet is to get a lawyer. If you can't afford one try legal aid. If you want to have a legal say in that child's life you need to do that. It's up to you. Right now she is calling all of the shots and until you go to court and set up custody/visitation that is how it is going to be. Do you have a specific question beyond that?

 

[samson hejl]

help

how do i attain legal aid in the state of ohio,also recently was are break up which ended in a altercation. We were both charged with domestic violence she has pleaded guilty and i intend to justify my behavior as self defense. what do i do

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

Do a search on google or such. And to justify your behavior you are using self defense? Oy why do people who have children can't even grow up enough not to get in a fight on the playground.

 

[samson hejl]

i'd like to explain

ohio, now the mother of my son was a very aggressive women, i went through h*ll and water and never laid a hand on her. For the past eight mths it seemed like everything was going downhill, I had recently became unemployed and bills stacked up. I was going to go to a temp agency to find employment, she wanted to go, i said no, she said take your son i went to get him and dress him, she grabbed him and told me i couldnt take him she was the only one with custody. I preceeded to take him from her, which lead to HER swinging. I put our child on the bed, and began definding myself. It lead to both of us on the ground, where i then struck her. Realizing what i had done, i immediatly went two minutes down the road,to the police station to turn myself in. After taking pics of me,and a statement, they went and got her, took her statement, released our son to my mother, and realesed us both. Now the documents from court, say domestic violence, is KNOWINGLY cause someone harm, i never intended for any of this. This was just one time i was done beginning smacked around and treated like a b*t*h.

 

[LdiJ]

ohio, now the mother of my son was a very aggressive women, i went through h*ll and water and never laid a hand on her. For the past eight mths it seemed like everything was going downhill, I had recently became unemployed and bills stacked up. I was going to go to a temp agency to find employment, she wanted to go, i said no, she said take your son i went to get him and dress him, she grabbed him and told me i couldnt take him she was the only one with custody. I preceeded to take him from her, which lead to HER swinging. I put our child on the bed, and began definding myself. It lead to both of us on the ground, where i then struck her. Realizing what i had done, i immediatly went two minutes down the road,to the police station to turn myself in. After taking pics of me,and a statement, they went and got her, took her statement, released our son to my mother, and realesed us both. Now the documents from court, say domestic violence, is KNOWINGLY cause someone harm, i never intended for any of this. This was just one time i was done beginning smacked around and treated like a b*t*h.

In what manner did you "take" the baby away from her? Depending on how you did it you may have started the physical fight by that action. Don't count on a judge seeing it as self-defense.

 

[dixygrl04]

I live in tn, but my husband is going through a similar situation. He has a 10 yr old daughter with a woman who he was never married to. The child has his last name and his name is on the BC. The mother,(they live in Alabama) has been in and out of trouble thepast 1-1/2 yrs, so her mother has acted as her 2 kids' guardian, while she was in jail/rehab, etc. The DHR comes to their homes regularly, etc. Recently the grandma told my husband she was filing for custody of the kids(the other one is not his) and he told her he understood that the courts would have to go thru him first, grandparents have no rights. She told him he has no rights since they were never married. We contacted the DHS children services, they told us she was wrong, he has more rights than the grandma does and the judge would have to contact him first, etc. Years ago they went to court for child support and she drew afdc, also, so the court in alabama is aware that he is the father, etc. but, we know exactly how confusing and nervewrecking all this can be. One day they call wanting my husband to come get the child, etc and when he says ok we're on our way, they back out, etc. We honestly think the mother is fixing to actually lose custody of her kids and they know the court will come to us and they are trying to get him to sign her over to grandma. We just have not had the money to hire an attorney, my husband has had 2 back surgeries this year and has been off since july. But I also know first hand about how custody battles can lead to anger and even violence.It;s sad but true.