Fathers threats

[fightingabuser]

What is the name of your state?Oregon I have sole custody of our children he did not want to go to court during the divorce because he did not want the judge to hear about his abuse towards me and the girls. Ihave tried everything possible to make him see that he needs to change his abusive habits and change in order to be a good father, but neothing has helped. He has even went so fair as to threaten me with suicide and hreated the girls to leave the state and they will never see him again. He doesnt understand that the children to not want to visit him nor even spek to him because of his abuse towards them both physically and mentally. Now he wants sole custody of the girls to be vendictive towards me. Isnt his statements also a form of abuse?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state?Oregon I have sole custody of our children he did not want to go to court during the divorce because he did not want the judge to hear about his abuse towards me and the girls. Ihave tried everything possible to make him see that he needs to change his abusive habits and change in order to be a good father, but neothing has helped. He has even went so fair as to threaten me with suicide and hreated the girls to leave the state and they will never see him again. He doesnt understand that the children to not want to visit him nor even spek to him because of his abuse towards them both physically and mentally. Now he wants sole custody of the girls to be vendictive towards me. Isnt his statements also a form of abuse?

They are, but verbal abuse is very difficult to prove.

Do you have a set visitation schedule that is court ordered? (signed off on by a judge) Have you been honoring that schedule? How old are your kids?

 

[fightingabuser]

Its not just verbal abuse, its physical also, documented by my daughters Dr.
I have honored it as much as I possible could. He refused them last Spring Break, Last Christmas, and Lst summr. Over 10 times he has sent them back home to me. Over 6 times they refused to go there and he didnt care. For the last 2 months they have refused going over thre because my dughter received a cuncussion from him, documented. Yes e have a visitation plan signed by the Judge. The girls are 8 and 10.

 

[Inquiry123]

More abuse...

my dughter received a cuncussion from him, documented.

In most states, health care workers are REQUIRED to REPORT cases of child abuse to the POLICE. After your daughters doctor "documented" the physical abuse what did the police do?

What was the nature of the "abuse"...How did the concussion occur?

 

[LdiJ]

Its not just verbal abuse, its physical also, documented by my daughters Dr.
I have honored it as much as I possible could. He refused them last Spring Break, Last Christmas, and Lst summr. Over 10 times he has sent them back home to me. Over 6 times they refused to go there and he didnt care. For the last 2 months they have refused going over thre because my dughter received a cuncussion from him, documented. Yes e have a visitation plan signed by the Judge. The girls are 8 and 10.

My concern is that a willful refusal of the custodial parent to honor visitation orders can be grounds for a judge to change custody....or slap on some major fines for contempt. The children refusing to go is considered to be YOU denying visitation from a legal perspective.

Therefore its critical that you pull together as much evidence as you can regarding the problems. He is most likely going to claim that all of his failures to exercise visitation were due to denials by you, so you need to be prepared to defend that. It would also be best to ask the judge to appoint a GAL (Guardian ad litem) for the children. Psych evals are probably in order as well.
All of that will be expensive...but its probably worth it.

 

[fightingabuser]

Yes her Dr. Reported it to CSD, after a short investigation the case worker stated that is was undecided, they took the father word over the girls. She received the cuncussion by her father slamming her into a metal post that did have some padding on it, cheap indoor outdoor carpeting. There was witnesses but the Police where unable to locate them, they were teenagers that where calling my ex names and they asked him if he was trying to kill his daughter. As far as the GAL I heard that they are not always the best and that they may side with the other parent and not the children. My children have complained to a Police officer that was here for another case against my ex and stated to him all about the abuse. They have stated the same thing to their school counselor and a private counselor that they see. And to a behavioral specialist that my daughters Dr. suggested I take her for her depression and anxiety attacks. My ex even with the restaining order that I have against him drove past our house tonight, hinked his horn and then 5 minutes later called. My modified restraining order says that he is not allowed within 200 ft of me, my house or the children.

 

[casa]

Yes her Dr. Reported it to CSD, after a short investigation the case worker stated that is was undecided, they took the father word over the girls. She received the cuncussion by her father slamming her into a metal post that did have some padding on it, cheap indoor outdoor carpeting. There was witnesses but the Police where unable to locate them, they were teenagers that where calling my ex names and they asked him if he was trying to kill his daughter. As far as the GAL I heard that they are not always the best and that they may side with the other parent and not the children. My children have complained to a Police officer that was here for another case against my ex and stated to him all about the abuse. They have stated the same thing to their school counselor and a private counselor that they see. And to a behavioral specialist that my daughters Dr. suggested I take her for her depression and anxiety attacks. My ex even with the restaining order that I have against him drove past our house tonight, hinked his horn and then 5 minutes later called. My modified restraining order says that he is not allowed within 200 ft of me, my house or the children.

And did you call the police to make a report about the incident tonight?

Have you filed the therapist's reports and Doctor's reports in court so that they are in the case file? DOCUMENT and file everything. Eventually the mound of papers will be hard for the GAL or Judge to ignore.

And please keep your posts together in one thread, so people can follow the specifics of your case without having to jump all over the forum to do it.

 

[fightingabuser]

How do I file the documentation with the courts? I do not have a attorney..