What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
There are of course a lot of details to the case, but the jist of this question is - I have filed to take my ex back to court (for the first time. he was the one bringing me back and forth before) to deal with medical expenses he's refused to pay, as well as "open a case" so I can bring him back to mediation.
the reason for all this now is because our last custody order had a summer visit plan different than standard because the kids were so little. It was due to end last summer and this summer be different, however the paperwork doesn't state "go back to standard visitation" or anything of that nature, so it needs to be redrafted.
I'm rather anxious at this point, and I have NOT had a good exp thus far with my court system. I'd never once seen actual judge (just subs), they totally ignored the fact he took the kids and hid them, drained joint acct and ransacked house, the fact he was physically attacking me infront of kids after seperation (police reports), the fact he didn't pay a dime in child support for 9m....etc.
Part of me is worried now that instead of slightly LESS time with the kids, he may end up with more? I think I just need some assurance this won't go horribly awry...
Ex hasn't paid a dime of medical, and cashed insurance payment checks and kept the money (ie, made a profit)
I got a truancy letter about the kids being tardy NINE times (bueller?) before xmas, and I know of atleast 2 more this month alone.
We are still joint owners on the house we lived in together for 3yrs, and I've been paying seperate for over 5.
The summer visit issue
Medical insurance coverage (he refuses to give me info, or cards, etc)
I'm asking for "my family wizard" to be ordered since he refuses to respond to emails and claims I didn't tell him things when I do....has taken kids to doc/dentist and NEVER told me about it, and didn't address issue for over 6m when it came to a cavity. My 8yr old nearly needed a root canal because of this!
I'm asking that he no longer cover the kids under his ins, but instead pay for me to cover the kids. I've checked and the cost is about the same, and i've already enrolled kids on my dental and vision because of the issues above. I got son glasses for 1st time a few weeks ago and his response (to my 9yr old) was "your mom should have told me and I would have given her my vision ins info" (that irked me because no 9yr old needs to be dragged into middle, not to mention i'd been ASKING for the ins info for over THREE years!)
I'm asking that "expanded visitation" be removed as currently he keeps kids until monday morning on his weekends and drops them off at school, and thurs/fri eve and drops them off at school friday morning. Not only does he get the kids up like 3hrs earlier than I do, but he's constantly late (hence all the tardies) and the kids are exausted. He claimed in court 5yrs ago he planned on getting an apartment nearby, and 5yrs later is still living with his parents about 50 miles away. With traffic this is sometimes a 1.5hr drive.
Figure something out about the house. I actually don't want it, but he cannot afford it. Seems unfair I keep paying for it....it was for sale for a year but after 6 attempts by my realtor to get him to resign contract, I told her to forget it. house is WAY upside down still.
Summer visit is supposed to be weekends (no thursdays) and 30 days visit, with me having a weekend in middle of the 30 days and me having a "veto" weekend during summer so I can do vacation. In order to get him to split it up (kids were 1 and 4 when we split) I had to agree to 2 visits of 15 days each, no weekend in the middle, plus thursdays. He refuses to include thursdays in the "veto" so I never get more than 6 days in a row with the kids. I'd love to take time off and drive up to chicago to spend time with HUUUGE extended family, but cannot.
I'd like it back to "default" now that my youngest is in school which was my plan all along.
and of course the medical he owes me, plus it would be nice to have court spank him on the wrists after all the BS he pulls. I'd love to see him pay for my legal fees on this. I don't hold much hope for that however...
my lawyer seems quite confident, and was gobsmacked ex had "expanded" and said "he shouldn't have this!"
But with history...i'm worried i'll end up in a worse place than I am. However I can't keep allowing kids to suffer for some of this stuff.
And FWIW, I think my ex is kinda a jerk (doesn't everyone?) but I don't doubt that he loves the kids, and the kids love their dad....but sadly are already seeing through some of his BS. I don't want to take the kids away from him - but as evidence by fact he lived with parents until he moved in with me at 24, and now at 35 going on 36 he's still living with them....he isn't the greatest of adults.
He doesn't take care of the kids, his parents do. all the kids do is play video games over there. He doesn't cut the kid's nails (after 30 days they are pretty bad!) or hair, take them to the doctor (unless it's to spite me) or make them do homework.
My issue is that dad can't take care of himself - so no matter how much he loves the kids, which I don't doubt, he's still about as mature as a 12yr old - and i'm not being insulting....he really does have the emotional maturity of a 12yr old. he throws temper tantrums, has that teenager attitude of "can you take out the trash please?" somehow becomes "you are worthless and never do anything!" and so on.
Should I be confident in my lawyer feeling sure we can make some of these changes? or am I in for a rude surprise??
There are of course a lot of details to the case, but the jist of this question is - I have filed to take my ex back to court (for the first time. he was the one bringing me back and forth before) to deal with medical expenses he's refused to pay, as well as "open a case" so I can bring him back to mediation.
the reason for all this now is because our last custody order had a summer visit plan different than standard because the kids were so little. It was due to end last summer and this summer be different, however the paperwork doesn't state "go back to standard visitation" or anything of that nature, so it needs to be redrafted.
I'm rather anxious at this point, and I have NOT had a good exp thus far with my court system. I'd never once seen actual judge (just subs), they totally ignored the fact he took the kids and hid them, drained joint acct and ransacked house, the fact he was physically attacking me infront of kids after seperation (police reports), the fact he didn't pay a dime in child support for 9m....etc.
Part of me is worried now that instead of slightly LESS time with the kids, he may end up with more? I think I just need some assurance this won't go horribly awry...
Ex hasn't paid a dime of medical, and cashed insurance payment checks and kept the money (ie, made a profit)
I got a truancy letter about the kids being tardy NINE times (bueller?) before xmas, and I know of atleast 2 more this month alone.
We are still joint owners on the house we lived in together for 3yrs, and I've been paying seperate for over 5.
The summer visit issue
Medical insurance coverage (he refuses to give me info, or cards, etc)
I'm asking for "my family wizard" to be ordered since he refuses to respond to emails and claims I didn't tell him things when I do....has taken kids to doc/dentist and NEVER told me about it, and didn't address issue for over 6m when it came to a cavity. My 8yr old nearly needed a root canal because of this!
I'm asking that he no longer cover the kids under his ins, but instead pay for me to cover the kids. I've checked and the cost is about the same, and i've already enrolled kids on my dental and vision because of the issues above. I got son glasses for 1st time a few weeks ago and his response (to my 9yr old) was "your mom should have told me and I would have given her my vision ins info" (that irked me because no 9yr old needs to be dragged into middle, not to mention i'd been ASKING for the ins info for over THREE years!)
I'm asking that "expanded visitation" be removed as currently he keeps kids until monday morning on his weekends and drops them off at school, and thurs/fri eve and drops them off at school friday morning. Not only does he get the kids up like 3hrs earlier than I do, but he's constantly late (hence all the tardies) and the kids are exausted. He claimed in court 5yrs ago he planned on getting an apartment nearby, and 5yrs later is still living with his parents about 50 miles away. With traffic this is sometimes a 1.5hr drive.
Figure something out about the house. I actually don't want it, but he cannot afford it. Seems unfair I keep paying for it....it was for sale for a year but after 6 attempts by my realtor to get him to resign contract, I told her to forget it. house is WAY upside down still.
Summer visit is supposed to be weekends (no thursdays) and 30 days visit, with me having a weekend in middle of the 30 days and me having a "veto" weekend during summer so I can do vacation. In order to get him to split it up (kids were 1 and 4 when we split) I had to agree to 2 visits of 15 days each, no weekend in the middle, plus thursdays. He refuses to include thursdays in the "veto" so I never get more than 6 days in a row with the kids. I'd love to take time off and drive up to chicago to spend time with HUUUGE extended family, but cannot.
I'd like it back to "default" now that my youngest is in school which was my plan all along.
and of course the medical he owes me, plus it would be nice to have court spank him on the wrists after all the BS he pulls. I'd love to see him pay for my legal fees on this. I don't hold much hope for that however...
my lawyer seems quite confident, and was gobsmacked ex had "expanded" and said "he shouldn't have this!"
But with history...i'm worried i'll end up in a worse place than I am. However I can't keep allowing kids to suffer for some of this stuff.
And FWIW, I think my ex is kinda a jerk (doesn't everyone?) but I don't doubt that he loves the kids, and the kids love their dad....but sadly are already seeing through some of his BS. I don't want to take the kids away from him - but as evidence by fact he lived with parents until he moved in with me at 24, and now at 35 going on 36 he's still living with them....he isn't the greatest of adults.
He doesn't take care of the kids, his parents do. all the kids do is play video games over there. He doesn't cut the kid's nails (after 30 days they are pretty bad!) or hair, take them to the doctor (unless it's to spite me) or make them do homework.
My issue is that dad can't take care of himself - so no matter how much he loves the kids, which I don't doubt, he's still about as mature as a 12yr old - and i'm not being insulting....he really does have the emotional maturity of a 12yr old. he throws temper tantrums, has that teenager attitude of "can you take out the trash please?" somehow becomes "you are worthless and never do anything!" and so on.
Should I be confident in my lawyer feeling sure we can make some of these changes? or am I in for a rude surprise??
