FLORIDA - Birth Mother Posting Pictures or Our Adopted Minor Child

[ConcernedDadMom]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FLORIDA

We adopted our son almost 11 years ago. He knows he is adopted but has had no contact with the birth mother since he was 1 year old when the adoption took place. We have had some communication with her (birth mother) over the years which have not gone very well.

Recently the birth mother has posted some pictures of our son on Facebook and another social media site. One picture is a scanned picture from one of his school yearbooks that she must have obtained somehow. The second picture was one of him that was taken while we were at Walmart. The picture is taken of him from the side. He, and us, were not aware his picture was being taken.

We have asked the birth mother to take these pictures down. We asked her to consider how our son would be affected if he was to see these pictures on her social media site or if someone our son knew saw them and told or showed my son his picture on her site. We live in towns near each other and it is quite possible this scenario could happen. She has refused to take them down.

The second picture is the one that has us most concerned. This picture was taken without our son’s knowledge. He does not know he was being photographed. We feel that either the birth mother or people she knows are looking for our son in public places in order to obtain pictures or possibly contact him.

Could this be construed as stalking? Harassment? Invasion of Privacy?

Are there any laws protecting minor children from this type of issue?

Do we have any rights?

Any and all help or advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

[cbg]

When you contacted Facebook and made them aware of the situation, what did they say?

 

[Zigner]

When you contacted Facebook and made them aware of the situation, what did they say?

What would be the basis of the report? Kiddo was in a public place.

 

[cbg]

Not my point. My point is that if they object to the posting of their minor's son's photo, the place to start is not with a lawsuit but by requesting that the picture be taken down. They have requested that the poster of the pictures remove them; with her refusal the next step on the ladder is Facebook. They're a long, long way from a lawsuit even in the unlikely event that they have grounds for one.

 

[Zigner]

Not my point. My point is that if they object to the posting of their minor's son's photo, the place to start is not with a lawsuit but by requesting that the picture be taken down. They have requested that the poster of the pictures remove them; with her refusal the next step on the ladder is Facebook. They're a long, long way from a lawsuit even in the unlikely event that they have grounds for one.

I understand and agree in general. My point was that there doesn't appear to be any violation of FB policy to report.

 

[anearthw]

Facebook now allows parents to report their minor's photos if they are under 13. Whether or not it gets removed, I don't know.
https://www.facebook.com/help/www/383420348387540

 

[Zigner]

Facebook now allows parents to report their minor's photos if they are under 13. Whether or not it gets removed, I don't know.
https://www.facebook.com/help/www/383420348387540

But, again, what privacy has been violated?

 

[RRevak]

But, again, what privacy has been violated?

While I agree there is no LEGAL privacy violated, it does seem a bit creepy that the birth mother is taking photos of the child while the parents are unaware then posting said photos on social media. I would also heavily complain to facebook about the removal of the photos. If someone were to take photos of my children while i'm out and unaware, I would also be making a big deal about it. But their complaint is with Facebook and any other social media site, not automatically jumping to the legal system.

 

[StephenH]

If the pictures were taken by the birth mother from when she had custody of the child, then technically she is the copyright owner of the pictures. I think as the result, there is really no law of her posting them under copyright. I am not sure if this is invasion of privacy either, you might need to contact a laywer. However, this type of thing is not uncommon. You can try contacting Facebook or the child's social worker too about this, but them doing anything about it is not guaranteed. I think her intent is to make it easier for the child to reconnect with his/her birth mother (yes some adopted children do go on Facebook and many remember their birth parents names from when they were little).

There are already many cases of pre-18 post-adoption contact that have happened using Facebook. In fact, as the result many adoption agencies are no longer closing adoptions, or guaranteeing confidentiality. Even many state child protective services departments are quickly realizing that they do not have a way to monitor, control, block contact made over Facebook from their offices, and they have to deal with cases of a child using this method to obtain the phone number or address of their birth relatives or siblings, and then calling or going to visit them all on their own, without supervision in some cases. Moreover, some birth parents have found the new name of their child by simply searching for a known childhood friend of their child who was not adopted, and then looking in their friends list, and recognizing their picture, or if only the last name was changed, a search of first name and area and recognizing their picture. Once the birth parents have exchanged contact information and addresses, and that info is in each others long term memories, the only way forward is to admit that you know have an open adoption from that point forward. Sometimes it only takes minutes for an adopted child to find their birth parents (or vice versa) on Facebook, and this can happen when the child is 17 or under. Then, minutes later the child could be having a conversation with them online, or even arrange a meeting in person.

As the result of this, I recommend children know the accurate version of their life story and the real circumstances about why they were taken away by the time they are 11, if not earlier, explained at their vocabulary level. They also need to know which birth relatives are safe to contact online and which are not.


For more info about ways to manage pre-18 post adoption contact over social media, I suggest you look at these resources

* "Bubble Wrapped Children" (Book) by Helen Oakwater
* Facing up to Facebook (Book) by Eileen Fursland
* "Untangling the Web" (Study) by Evan B Donaldson Adoption Institute
* "Untangling the Web II" (Study) by Evan B Donaldson Adoption Institute
* Adoption and Social Media" by Adoption Star
* Social Media and the Post-Adoption Experience" by Deborah Siegel (article in Social Work Today)

 

[LdiJ]

If the pictures were taken by the birth mother from when she had custody of the child, then technically she is the copyright owner of the pictures.

Child was adopted at 1. One of the pictures is a yearbook picture (obviously could not be copyrighted by the birth mom) and the other is a candid shot that happened at a Walmart (could have been taken by the birth mom, but without permission from the child's legal parents).

The whole situation is pretty creepy at worst, selfish at best on the part of the birth mom.

 

[StephenH]

Uploading photos to Facebook is easy. All it takes is a scanner and saving it as .JPG, .GIF, or .PNG file.

If it is a yearly photo, that you own, you might be able to go through the adoption agency and have them contact Facebook and try to encourage them to take it down. If you are the photographer that owns the photo (as in actually taking it), it is possible that you could go after the birth mother for copyright infringement but you may need to register it with the copyright office first. You could also send a DMCA notice too.