Grandparent rights in MI

[zeuss]

Michigan. Long story short, My daughter's father is in prison for repeat offender for weapons and having a bag of meth on him. He also got caught in the middle of his meth lab when he was out on bond. He hasn't been charged with the lab yet. His mother who hasn't seen my daughter who's 9 since March, wants to see her and come over or take her. My daughter hasn't seen or talked to her father since January on his visitation, nothing, just gone. My daughter has also seen a counselor over the years to be able to deal with all of there crap. They put her on the back burner all of the time and then expect me to bend over backwards when they come around again. When I don't then I am the one that's wrong and they turn it around so my daughter gets mad at me. The grandma calls about 3 times a week for her and sends letters. So far we havent been home when she has called and I have intercepted the letters. Everyone has something about "your mother wont --". Her father has also sent her a nasty letter from prison that she won't see either.
I know the grandma can't afford to get a lawyer but she is pushing the issue of seeing her. She even went to my husbands work to talk to him. On one hand I feel guilty about keeping my daughter away from her grandma, grandparents are real important to me, but on the other hand I feel more like I have to protect her mental health. The kicker is her dad was running the lab at grandma's house and she knew about it. She is of course lieing and didnt know a thing so she is getting away with it. She hasn't made any threats against us yet but how do I keep her away. I don't get call block in our area, I tried. Do I have a leg to stand on for her possibly getting grandparent rights denied? She helped do some of the shopping for the lab but is in denial and isn't going to get any charges for it. Will FOC believe this?

 

[LdiJ]

Michigan. Long story short, My daughter's father is in prison for repeat offender for weapons and having a bag of meth on him. He also got caught in the middle of his meth lab when he was out on bond. He hasn't been charged with the lab yet. His mother who hasn't seen my daughter who's 9 since March, wants to see her and come over or take her. My daughter hasn't seen or talked to her father since January on his visitation, nothing, just gone. My daughter has also seen a counselor over the years to be able to deal with all of there crap. They put her on the back burner all of the time and then expect me to bend over backwards when they come around again. When I don't then I am the one that's wrong and they turn it around so my daughter gets mad at me. The grandma calls about 3 times a week for her and sends letters. So far we havent been home when she has called and I have intercepted the letters. Everyone has something about "your mother wont --". Her father has also sent her a nasty letter from prison that she won't see either.
I know the grandma can't afford to get a lawyer but she is pushing the issue of seeing her. She even went to my husbands work to talk to him. On one hand I feel guilty about keeping my daughter away from her grandma, grandparents are real important to me, but on the other hand I feel more like I have to protect her mental health. The kicker is her dad was running the lab at grandma's house and she knew about it. She is of course lieing and didnt know a thing so she is getting away with it. She hasn't made any threats against us yet but how do I keep her away. I don't get call block in our area, I tried. Do I have a leg to stand on for her possibly getting grandparent rights denied? She helped do some of the shopping for the lab but is in denial and isn't going to get any charges for it. Will FOC believe this?

Ok, take a big deep breath. First, Grandma has no rights of any kind. She could sue to attempt to get visitation rights, but her odds of winning are not strong. FOC would not be involved in anything at this point. They may be involved eventually, if Grandma sues for visitation rights, but they can't be involved prior to that.

If you feel comfortable enough to allow Grandma to visit under your supervision, perhaps in your home or in a public place, you could consider doing that. Otherwise, you are free to do whatever you feel is best for your child.

 

[zeuss]

Thank you for that reasurrance. I have thought about the supervised thing in my home and that would be it. The only thing is I don't trust her enough to keep her mouth shut about letters that have been sent by her and her son from prison to my daughter. Or that she will not say something about how she has tried to get ahold of her but her mom won't let her. It would be bad on my daughter if she had to witness me throwing grandma out of my house to leaving somewhere.

 

[zeuss]

The soga continues. Over the weekend I got on my 9 year old daughter's instant messanger and saw where the grandmother had sent her about a dozen off line messages. All of them said somewhere that "she probably wasn't getting them or letters I have sent because of your mother". I deleted them all. My daughter and I had changed her name on the computer so that no one would know except her Aunt and brother out of state whom she talks to. The Grandma has also called the school last week to see when my daughter has any programs or anything coming up because she wants to go to the school to see her. There is still no charges against her yet for helping her son with his meth lab and doesn't look like there is going to be.
Is there anything legally that I can do to keep her away from my daughter?? What about at the school?? She hasn't made any physical threats against us but can I get a restraining order at all against her?

 

[LdiJ]

The soga continues. Over the weekend I got on my 9 year old daughter's instant messanger and saw where the grandmother had sent her about a dozen off line messages. All of them said somewhere that "she probably wasn't getting them or letters I have sent because of your mother". I deleted them all. My daughter and I had changed her name on the computer so that no one would know except her Aunt and brother out of state whom she talks to. The Grandma has also called the school last week to see when my daughter has any programs or anything coming up because she wants to go to the school to see her. There is still no charges against her yet for helping her son with his meth lab and doesn't look like there is going to be.
Is there anything legally that I can do to keep her away from my daughter?? What about at the school?? She hasn't made any physical threats against us but can I get a restraining order at all against her?

I wouldn't recommend going the route of the restraining order. That might give grandma the incentive to file for visitation.

First, I would instruct the school not to give any information to the grandmother regarding your child. You have already changed your child's screen name so that should help, but you also may want to block grandma's screen name from her email, and maybe even restrict instant messaging.

 

[zeuss]

Grandparents rights in MI

I blocked grandma's email on her instant messanger and email service. I also talked to the school this morning when I dropped my daughter off. They told me that without a court order they can't do much about her coming for breakfasts or lunches or to school programs. I really doubt but don't want to curse myself, that she would get any kind of regular visitation since FOC has already denied her as the supervisor for her son's visits with our daughter. But that was last year before the big drug busts. I know she doesn't have any money for a lawyer either.

 

[LdiJ]

I blocked grandma's email on her instant messanger and email service. I also talked to the school this morning when I dropped my daughter off. They told me that without a court order they can't do much about her coming for breakfasts or lunches or to school programs. I really doubt but don't want to curse myself, that she would get any kind of regular visitation since FOC has already denied her as the supervisor for her son's visits with our daughter. But that was last year before the big drug busts. I know she doesn't have any money for a lawyer either.

Wait just one minute....you need to start straight up the chain of command with the school system. The school cannot give a grandparent (or any other relative for that matter) access to the children against the parent's wishes. Talk to the principal at the school first (make an appointment) and if that doesn't get you anywhere go to the superintendent.

 

[zeuss]

Grandparents rights in MI

Well I have talked to the Principal and the secretary. They both told me that they can not stop her from seeing or even taking my daughter since she is a blood relative. I told them that I have full custody and they don't have a court order that says she can go with them. I also told them that I would be giving them a written statement which will say that the grandmother is to have no contact with my daughter per the FOC's advise. They both got real nasty and asked me if this was my law or did I know for a fact that it was the law because they knew nothing of the sort. They told me that parents all the time ask them to keep others away from there kids without any kind of legal back up. I told them that if they let my daughter leave the school property with her that there would be hell to pay for it. I am in the process of finding out who the school board president is. Where can I find any kind of written law to shove at these people? This lady is just psyco enough to take my daughter and the school would sit by and let it happen.

 

[LdiJ]

Well I have talked to the Principal and the secretary. They both told me that they can not stop her from seeing or even taking my daughter since she is a blood relative. I told them that I have full custody and they don't have a court order that says she can go with them. I also told them that I would be giving them a written statement which will say that the grandmother is to have no contact with my daughter per the FOC's advise. They both got real nasty and asked me if this was my law or did I know for a fact that it was the law because they knew nothing of the sort. They told me that parents all the time ask them to keep others away from there kids without any kind of legal back up. I told them that if they let my daughter leave the school property with her that there would be hell to pay for it. I am in the process of finding out who the school board president is. Where can I find any kind of written law to shove at these people? This lady is just psyco enough to take my daughter and the school would sit by and let it happen.

Before you go to the school board president go to the superintent for the school district. He/she would be next up in the chain of command (the principal's boss). Do this very quickly. That principal is going to get his/her ass chewed. I know its the law in MI, because I have friends there with situations similar to yours. If that doesn't work then you really need to get an attorney to threaten to sue them if they allow contact with your child or release your child to anyone that you don't approve. Then they will have to have it reviewed by their legal counsel, and then they will ALL get their asses chewed.

 

[zeuss]

Grandparents rights in MI

The first person that I talked too was the Superintendent and then his secretary. I talked to the Principal yesterday and he said that they can stop the grandma from taking her and they can "try" and stop her from talking to her too. The only thing wrong with that is the school doesn't have a lock down policy so there are parents, adults, etc. walking in at all times in all doors so it would be impossible to watch out for her. I told them not to give her any information but I was told that it depended on who answered the phone if that would actually happen or not. So yesterday I went to the local Police Station to fill out a PPO on behalf of my daughter. The grandma keeps emailing and sending letters still. My daughter has no desire to see her grandmother at all. I was told by her AUnt that the grandma wants to talk to my daughter to tell her the truth, whatever that is and she wants to take her to see her dad at the Prison. Visitation is on saturdays and she isnt out of my sight on the weekends. I am not sure how PPO's work and how hard they are to get.