Hacking email passwords...

[7zcata]

What is the name of your state? MS
greetings. I suspected my wife was having an affair, so I installed a keyboard tracking program on our home computer. She logged on one day while I was at work and checked her 'usual' email account, as well as a 'secret' email account she used to communicate with her lover. She also posts intimate details on their liasons on an internet discussion group, which is password protected and membership-only.

I confronted her with the information I found, and she is saying it will all be inadmissable in divorce court, because it was obtained illegally. The best answer I can get is that this is a grey area. She also says that I broke some kind of federal law when I checked her 'regular' email account, because she uses that to communicate with her lawyer. I never saw any emails to the lawyer, but she did discuss legal strategy on the disscussion group.

I later told her the tracking software was no longer active, and it wasn't. However, to my suprise, I found one day that it was on and still recording (it turns itself back on upon reboot). I saw the new passwords and can still check all of the websites, but she doesn't know it. Am I on thin ice with this? Nearly all of the emails and posts she makes are from work onto password protected sites.

Please advise. Thanks

 

[Bali Hai]

What is the name of your state? MS
greetings. I suspected my wife was having an affair, so I installed a keyboard tracking program on our home computer. She logged on one day while I was at work and checked her 'usual' email account, as well as a 'secret' email account she used to communicate with her lover. She also posts intimate details on their liasons on an internet discussion group, which is password protected and membership-only.

I confronted her with the information I found, and she is saying it will all be inadmissable in divorce court, because it was obtained illegally. The best answer I can get is that this is a grey area. She also says that I broke some kind of federal law when I checked her 'regular' email account, because she uses that to communicate with her lawyer. I never saw any emails to the lawyer, but she did discuss legal strategy on the disscussion group.

I later told her the tracking software was no longer active, and it wasn't. However, to my suprise, I found one day that it was on and still recording (it turns itself back on upon reboot). I saw the new passwords and can still check all of the websites, but she doesn't know it. Am I on thin ice with this? Nearly all of the emails and posts she makes are from work onto password protected sites.

Please advise. Thanks

Jesus H. Christ!! Drop the drama and file for divorce!!

 

[TheGeekess]

Jesus H. Christ!! Drop the drama and file for divorce!!

For once, I agree with you. Especially since Mississippi is a No-Fault state.

 

[7zcata]

Well, I guess the advise here is worth what you pay for it.

Divorce is filed and the temporary order regarding living arrangements and custody is pending. Each of us thinks the other should leave the family home - thus, neither of us is leaving.

 

[Golfball]

I suppose one of the more relevant questions would be what are you expecting to use the evidence for?

 

[Zigner]

And how are you expecting to defend yourself against the charges for violating FEDERAL law?
My suggestion: Tell your ex that the program probably restarts itself upon reboot. Give her ALL information on how to disable/remove the program...and don't touch HER computer again. Get your own (or buy her one)

 

[Golfball]

And how are you expecting to defend yourself against the charges for violating FEDERAL law?
My suggestion: Tell your ex that the program probably restarts itself upon reboot. Give her ALL information on how to disable/remove the program...and don't touch HER computer again. Get your own (or buy her one)

If the computer is in the marital home, both parties are resident, and if the computer itself is marital property, is it necessarily wrongful to install keylogger software on it, since OP is equal owner of said computer?

The fact that OP's STBX uses one of the breached accounts to correspond w/ her attorney wouldn't change the legality (or lack thereof) of the intrusion, however. (Whether the OP's STBX is negligent for possibly corresponding with her attorney in an unsecure area is open for debate.)

 

[Zigner]

If the computer is in the marital home, both parties are resident, and if the computer itself is marital property, is it necessarily wrongful to install keylogger software on it, since OP is equal owner of said computer?

Yes, it is wrong (legally AND morally)

EDIT: It's not the installation itself that's wrong...it's the USE of it

 

[7zcata]

Good points all...

I don't need the actual information anymore. She's admitted to the affairs, and thats about it. In my custody arguments, there is a 'moral fitness' criterion, and the affairs may or may not play in to it.

I felt justified in spying on the computer when I discovered the affairs. There is not really any new information that I've gathered since I found out the passwords the second time.

Since I posted the first time, I have revealed to her that I know the password, and she changed them. I'm thankful, because its pretty stressful having that kind of knowlege - especially if you can witness your wife's affair to a degree of detail that is rare to ever have. She's not happy about it, of course, and plans to never use 'our' computer again.

I DO have an ethical problem with having known the passwords. I felt bad about it... but knowing the password and not looking is VERY difficult. It felt like a drug addiction or something.

I'm unfamiliar with the statues involved (Federal or otherwise). Any further thoughts about whether I need to worry about that?

Thanks.

 

[2Mistakes]

Why not file the divorce IRD, wait your 60 days, have the judge sign it? Does it really matter to you that much if it's granted on the grounds of adultery?

 

[Ohiogal]

Why not file the divorce IRD, wait your 60 days, have the judge sign it? Does it really matter to you that much if it's granted on the grounds of adultery?

Well of course it does because if he is not granted divorce on the grounds of adultery he cannot continuously remind the ex of what a whore she is.

 

[2Mistakes]

Well of course it does because if he is not granted divorce on the grounds of adultery he cannot continuously remind the ex of what a whore she is.

LOL. Oh yeah, forgot about that.

My wife was a family law paralegal for 5 years (here in MS), and she has told me stories of people who didn't want to be married to each other anymore, but wanted the divorce of grounds of adultery or habitually cruel and inhumane treatment. So they would each pay their attorneys thousands of $$ and go to trial.

When for a grand total of $500 or less, they could have jointly filed using irreconcilable differences for the grounds and had their judgment in hand in 60 days.

I'll just never understand some people.

 

[Ohiogal]

LOL. Oh yeah, forgot about that.

My wife was a family law paralegal for 5 years (here in MS), and she has told me stories of people who didn't want to be married to each other anymore, but wanted the divorce of grounds of adultery or habitually cruel and inhumane treatment. So they would each pay their attorneys thousands of $$ and go to trial.

When for a grand total of $500 or less, they could have jointly filed using irreconcilable differences for the grounds and had their judgment in hand in 60 days.

I'll just never understand some people.

See I just do things the wrong way. I tell my clients the best way to get a divorce is incompatibility or living separate and apart for a year. And that they dont' want to do a dissolution but rather an uncontested divorce if the other party if flaky. And that mediation is the best bet. And that for custody modifications they should try the informal procedings first because it is cheaper and they don't need me.

DAMN. No wonder I don't have a Mercedes in the driveway of a six bedroom house. I am going about this all wrong.

 

[2Mistakes]

See I just do things the wrong way. I tell my clients the best way to get a divorce is incompatibility or living separate and apart for a year. And that they dont' want to do a dissolution but rather an uncontested divorce if the other party if flaky. And that mediation is the best bet. And that for custody modifications they should try the informal procedings first because it is cheaper and they don't need me.

DAMN. No wonder I don't have a Mercedes in the driveway of a six bedroom house. I am going about this all wrong.

This just proves that you do what you do for the RIGHT reasons, which is awesome!

 

[7zcata]

Nice jab Ohiogal...

She is the mother of my children, and she is not a whore. Maybe you are projecting that on her due to some insecurites of your own.

Yes, I spied to find out the truth. The divorce is not only about the affairs, and I'm not going to say that I am without fault.

I don't want the password information anymore, and now that I've told her, I don't have them. We are getting a divorce, and the custody issues don't center around her affairs. Besides, she never brought the guys to our house.

The reason why I posted, is that I'm a little bit worried about the hacking of the passwords. I got them from our home computer, but she left the majority of her posts from her work computer. I know its not illegal to 'spy' on your own home computer, but if that spying reveals passwords to sites that can be used from other locations, it doesn't seem like it can be considered a 'home computer' situation anymore.

I read your tagline, and I agree with it completely.