Hospital Records

[Elizabeth Nese]

i live in tennessee. dave and i were married in a religious ceremony only. dave's health has been deteriorating over the last few years and for about two years he was completely paralyzed. i took care of him twenty-four hours a day seven days a week. i loved him deeply and we had a special relationship. dave died in january. since his death his mother has accused me of 'murdering him' because i had a durable healthcare power of attorney. she claims i no longer wished to take care of him. i told his family that i had no say in his death. it was a natural death and i was never required to use the power of attorney. we lived in one of her homes and now she has evicted me. his sister is torn between his mother and i. how can i obtain the necessary records to prove his death was natural. dave had a living will as well. i intend to move back to nj and have made all the arrangements. still, i feel i deserve some vindication from these painful allegations.

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

i live in tennessee. dave and i were married in a religious ceremony only. dave's health has been deteriorating over the last few years and for about two years he was completely paralyzed. i took care of him twenty-four hours a day seven days a week. i loved him deeply and we had a special relationship. dave died in january. since his death his mother has accused me of 'murdering him' because i had a durable healthcare power of attorney. she claims i no longer wished to take care of him. i told his family that i had no say in his death. it was a natural death and i was never required to use the power of attorney. we lived in one of her homes and now she has evicted me. his sister is torn between his mother and i. how can i obtain the necessary records to prove his death was natural. dave had a living will as well. i intend to move back to nj and have made all the arrangements. still, i feel i deserve some vindication from these painful allegations.

My response:

I'm sure you must have loved Dave very much, and probably would have sacrificed yourself if it meant him living rather than dying. You sound like an incredibly wonderful person.

In response to your question, you are entitled to Dave's Death Cerificate which would show the reason for his dying. However, if you're looking for "vindication", the odds are you're never going to receive it. Generally speaking, when a mother makes up her mind about something happening in her child's life, there's usually nothing that will convince her otherwise. You could probably show his mother medical studies, and coroner reports, and Death Certificates until you're blue in the face; but, the liklihood of her changing her mind about you is slim and none.

Go to New Jersey, and get on with your life.

I'm very sorry for your loss, but it's time to leave the past in the past, along with his mother.

Good luck to you.

IAAL