I didn't give him to her.

[Fatherof4]

What is the name of your state? MS
I've had my son for over a year while my ex was overseas. In the past 25 months she has had him about 40 days. He is now 3yrs 9mos old. I have filed for a modification of custody. She got back two months ago. She called about two weeks ago and said she is coming to get him (she lives in Arizona). I told her not to come because I wasn't giving him to her. I told her we would settle it in court. She didn't come to get him. Can I get in trouble for this? I moved here 8 months ago (she knew and consented) because this is my wife's home state. I am trying to change the jurisdiction to here. Will this look bad on me?

 

[Fatherof4]

I don't care if you guys don't know about MS law. I would just like to hear your opinions please.

 

[coosi]

In the circumstance you described, I don't think you can "get in trouble" for being there. Further, if a new "order" is issued and you and the child live there, I believe that becomes the Controlling Order and that State law prevails. IMO

 

[Fatherof4]

But we haven't went to court yet and I'm not the CP. I don't know what to do. She called him twice in the past year. He also has an expressive and receptive language delay. He can't understand explanations and he thinks my wife is his mom. He doesn't even know his birth mom and I don't want to give him to a stranger (that is what she is to him anyway).

 

[CalieBayGirl]

In the circumstance you described, I don't think you can "get in trouble" for being there. Further, if a new "order" is issued and you and the child live there, I believe that becomes the Controlling Order and that State law prevails. IMO

I'm sorry, but Coosie is mistaken,

You are on the right path as to getting jurisdiction changed but there are variables here.

If your X is a resident of the issuing state, then you need to file for this there. She was "Out of Country", but what state does she claim as her residence?

If it is the issuing state of the order, you need to file this there.

Seek out your Family Law Facilitator at your local court house there, I assure you they can put you in the right direction.

Good Luck

 

[Fatherof4]

Yes. We were divorced in mid 2000. Joint physical with her having primary legal unless I move 50 miles or more away. She will then keep him with her.
Went to court again in Jan 2002 because she sent him to live with her parents in GA for 8 months. She still kept primary legal and joint physical but I didn't have to pay CS anymore.
I'm tired of her having custody and say over everything and I'm the one raising my child.

 

[Fatherof4]

The divorce was in AZ. We are both in the military and her home state is GA, where she pays taxes and votes.

 

[CalieBayGirl]

I understand this is emotional, but what I quoted, is what you need to do. This has to be filed in the state the order came out of as of right now. Please just go to your local court house tomorrow, the office you want to go to will be the "Family Law Facilitator", I am confident all court houses in all states have these.

Good Luck, and get moving.

 

[CalieBayGirl]

Are you still a resident of AZ?

 

[CalieBayGirl]

I have to go, but your post is interesting as I just went through some thing similar.

If you are a resident of the issuing order(Your military, if you still claim residence there, that is your residence), I recommend filing every thing there.

It is just easier than going through the motions of trying to get jurisdiction any where else, it will be a long and costly road.

If you are not a resident, nor is your X, then you do have every right to register that order in your state. This does not mean that the order can be modified, it can be inforced.

Because of your military statis, the best advice I can give you is to talk to some one IN PERSON at your local court house.

Good luck

 

[Fatherof4]

I'm not sure I was ever a resident of AZ. I was stationed there when I was in the military but I paid taxes in CO which was my home state. I now live in MS , my wife's home state (she was also in the military). We have lived here for the past 8 months and my wife just had twin daughters (sorry, proud daddy. We don't intend to move anymore.

 

[CalieBayGirl]

OK. The easiest thing to do is file in AZ, even though none of youe are residents, the order still came out of there.

You do have the option of registering it in your home state, but as I said to get that state to take over jurisdiction is very difficult, your X would have to consent to that.

My advice, is to do it out of AZ, take a family vacation, it's a long way, but doing it any other way is a long and lengthy,and ex pensive route.

You need to see your family law facilitator at your local court house, it is a free service.

Good Luck

 

[coosi]

If you file from the state you live in, and the child is there, that will be where everything originates. You can do this. If you travel to another state for the order, you will have to continue to do this. However, it sounds like the other parent may put up a fuss. You should see a lawyer or family facilitator(?). Does the military offer any legal assistance in family matters?

I've known many people who got help with these matters through Legal Aid, but I think there are income limits, etc.

 

[CalieBayGirl]

Coosi is mistaken,

You can file to have the order registered in your state, but all parties need to consent in order to modify the order.

Your family law facilitator is your best bet right now, and hopefully one of the attorneys on this site will see your thread.

Best wishes

 

[Fatherof4]

Is there no way to do it in my state? I have 4 very young children and just got a new job. It would be very difficult for me to go there for any amount of time. Plus I think everything we need for court is here. The only thing there is her.