I felt humiliated by a Human Services Professional

[standtall]

What is the name of your state? New York

I have been on disability for depression. I originally injured my leg, foot, now diagnosed as a muniscule tear in my knee. Anyhow I also sought help to get back to work through a program called VESID. Many things do not seem right but the straw that broke the camels back (my poor knee plus my dignity) is when a long awaited appointment was set up in a local public library with a VESID counselor. I agreed to meet her there assuming, I know never assume, that she knew the place and would have set up some sort of quiet area to talk with me. Not. She set us up in a large room where at least one person sat an ears length away most obviously listening curiously. That person was someone I had seen at another place where I had joined a group for support to lose weight recently and get out of the house and feel better. When the counselor began to disclose my chart information without much regard to privacy I wrote her a not saying not to talk about me out loud, respect my confidentiality. She continued to say I had to cooporate with her and let her know if I was seeing my mental health counselor. I again tried to quiet her but she then esculated to saying I was obviously in need of someone to talk to about my diagnosis and that I was being uncoopertive. She took my written notes and said each word out loud as though amused and wanting to let others hear her. I asked how long she was a counselor and she said all her life since age 19 and that she was in her late fourties now. I asked for empathy and she said that I might be needing to follow up with mental health before she could continue helping me since I was so difficult to understand and was not willing to discuss my treatment needs. At this point I was so humiliated I felt like crying. The lady who was eves dropping smirked and seemed to be looking away but still stayed there. The counselor said since the library is a public place and I had in fact agreed to meet there people would have every right to be in the area with us while she worked with me. I told her I had no idea it would not be in a room some where or at least she would have found a less open area to talk. She then asked if I wanted to go to McDonalds restaurant or if I knew a place to go that had no people I would feel embarrassed to be around. This just added more to a bad situation since she continued to repeat my mental health diagnosis and how that was causing me the distress.
The original injury was joked about by my boss. It was played down and not properly reported or handled. The doctor I met with blamed my age and lost my xrays which he later on said were useless since the injury was inside mostly not a broken bone. It took over two years to get a MRI and more help but by that time I have learned to accept the pain as a thing to just live with forever.
I want my life back but I wonder if seeking help in this current system is ridiculous and is it OK to violate me so badly and get away with it.
This woman made me so sad.
I have depression.
My former career prior to doing sales in insurance business, real estate etc was Human Services and counseling. I do not recall ever treating people like I have been treated. Am I a rarity?

Help

Stand Tall gal hoping make a difference.

 

[dallas702]

First, you should not have agreed to a meeting in a public place.

Second, you should have terminated the meeting when the first violation of your privacy occured.

Third, you know that you need to go to this cretin's supervisor, then up the food chain until all the government wags have been notified that unless REAL disciplinary action is taken against the offending idiot you will take legal action against all of them.

Last, rather than getting your feelings hurt you need to toughen up and stop being a victim...especially from clowns who your taxes pay to abuse their privileges. Fight back!

 

[standtall]

Thank you Dallas for reply.

I see your point but I did not think she would have chosen a public library without having some private meeting area set up for us. When the appt was set up I was told after asking about privacy that the counselors often met there with people and I figured that meant it was probably in some area appropriate for meetings.

Try and put yourself in my shoes for a second. I had looked forward to this meeting for sometime. I did in fact try to politely put a stop to the disclosure, it was terribly awkward. I was feeling the sigma of the words mental health being repeated out loud to me, I was trying to shut her up and end this meeting. I was writing my concerns to avoid talking them out loud and she was voicing my words, which made no sense at all. I mean if someone writes you a note, that is, someone you already know can speak, is not mute, why would one say what you write out loud?! If you think about this I was ending the meeting fairly quick and she was still speaking using what she had in my chart as a threat to me to humiliate me. It was so obvious that I am surprised the amused bystander didn't do something other than listen and pear at us. I would have I think! I would have felt the pain and wanted to at least let the person being hurt know I was on their side and would be willing to vouch for what I had just heard if they needed a witness.

The offending idiot probably has an offending boss and another one that will discriminate against me as a complainer rather than discipline this woman but I will file a complaint. I just feel it is so obvious here that she can do what she feels like that her superiors may not be open to discussion either.

I do not mean to be so pesimistic, I am hurt and worried that I am not somebody with any power here and we have a ridiculous system with all sorts of rules but no one follows them. HIPPA and CONFIDENTIALITY etc.

I wish I could sue them! I am tired of being a victim. I wish I had some status in this world so that they would stand up and realize they can't be in these roles just to get benefits for themselves and have a title. But reality is, they get away with it a lot.

I really do appreciate your responses Dallas. I will try to be more assertive with this matter. I cry too much and do too little to help myself. I am not strong right now but I have not always been so distraught. I can stand tall again.

 

[dallas702]

Well, you could find out where she parks and go poke all her tires. Then, drive by and laugh.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

NO! I am not cyber stalking, but this post has "Kelly" written all over it.

 

[Heather2]

Well, you could find out where she parks and go poke all her tires. Then, drive by and laugh.

Nah, stick a potato in her tailipipe. Car won't start and she won't know why.

 

[Cherryhummer]

Said but true

Some people due get pleasure from others pain. You need to keep in mind there is always someone above that person,not to mention with out people like us, honest with a heart placed with undue hardship..that person would not have her job. Our taxes give us the right to get back what we fund anyway. Do not roll over and take anything again do research and go above heads you will find help there is always that one person who likes and believes in the work job they have. You will also find through research laws,rights that are written that do wonders when you confront those with things,things that in there job should know but do not...kill them with kindness..in real truth then you will never have to deal with those who..one day will feel what you were made to. You are the strong those are the weak.