Incident at the apartment pool

[diamond20]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

The other day I was at the pool at my apartment and male lifeguard came up to me and said that I should cover myself or change my bathing suit because it is inappropriate. He said it outloud and everyone heard that and people started wispering around me. I asked the lifeguard why didn't female lifeguard approached me about that and he said she was busy watching the pool. Could not he have replaced her?

I also asked to show me the rules that forbid my bathng suit. He showed me the rules which stated "no thongs allowed". My bathing suit rather small but it's not a thong and it covers all the areas exposed by the thong. I tried to tell this to the guard but he just kept on screaming. One of the tenants came up to us and started screaming at me too, saying that her children were disgusted. I honestly do not see anything disgusting about me - I am very athletic and fit. I had to go and change. The last time I felt so humiliated was when teacher on 7th grade sent me home because she didn't like my make up. When I came back, everyone was talking about the incident which did not make me feel better. I have been going to the same pool for 2 years and never had a problem.
So I went to the apartment office and asked them to tell me exactly what I can and what I cannot wear at the pool. Also I let them know that things like that should be told descretly and by female lifeguard. The manager agreed with me and told me she'll get back to me with what I can wear next time. She never did and whenever I tried calling, people at the office would tell me manager is not there.

When I press them to tell me exactly what I can and cannot wear at the pool they say that it does not matter my bathing suit is not forbidden by the rules, and that it's all about respecting people around me. OK, I am not going to wear the offending bathing suit anymore, but how do I know if the other ones I have a suitable?? I don't want to wear them at the pool and have lifeguard make a scene again. All I ask for is to tell me exactly what is suitable, that's all.

My question is do they have the right to forbid me from wearing something that is not firbidden by the printed rules, just because one of the tenants didn't like it and complained? What can I do?

 

[Cheeseknife]

You can wear decent swimming suits at the pool. The apartment complex, and their employees, get to call them as they see them. For example: just because nude sun bathing isn't specifically mentioned doesn't mean that the apartment complex's representitives can't put their foot down on it. Being "fit and athletic" doesn't give you wide range to expose yourself, nor can you demand to be told only by a member of your own gender that you're swimsuit is unacceptable.

 

[diamond20]

Well, there is a big difference between nude and wearing a bathing suit that is considered normal by most.

 

[Zigner]

7th grade and you were already being reprimanded for inappropriate makeup?


Way to go mom & dad.

 

[xylene]

Grow a pair.

If you were confident of your position you should have told them off and said "i'm not changing nothing"

The fact is - thong or not - you were wearing a skimpy bathing suit. Either you are ok with that AND the obvious consequence that others might complain about your attire and are willing to stand up to that criticism

OR

You knew your suit was too revealing and that is why you were 'shamed' by your suits revealingness being complained about, by a male no less.

The lifeguard did not complain - a family did.

Your trim fit has nothing to do with anything.

You knew your suit was too revealing for a family pool and that is why you got embarrassed and put out by this 'incident'.

 

[Antigone*]

Why and the heck did the OP post on a LEGAL advice forum. what was she thinking ~ Where and how does she think she was legally damaged???

 

[Cheeseknife]

Well, there is a big difference between nude and wearing a bathing suit that is considered normal by most.

Normal is a subjective standard. What's a normal bathing suit for Miami Beach in July would probably get you arrested at a community pool in Colorado. Really, what this comes down to is you feel you're an attractive woman and it brassed you off that a male life guard (who should be enjoying the view in your book) came up and told you nobody wanted to see the goods, so cover up. This sort of thing is one of the reasons I won't consider buying multi-family properties with pools. The reality is you need to wear a swimsuit that is modest to an apartment community pool. In other words: buy some one peices for the apartment pool, or find another where covering yourself isn't going to be an issue.

 

[You Are Guilty]

What can I do?

In a simply amazing stroke of good luck, I happen to run a bathing suit screening company. For a limited time only, I can offer you a 30 day free trial which works as follows:
- We provide you with your own confidential, unique email address
- You then have 30 days during which you can forward photos of yourself in as many bathing suits as you need opinions on. (We accept all standard file formats).
- Opinions as to the suits are returned to the email address of your choosing within 24 hours.

We do not take your credit card information and there is nothing to buy. If you are dissatisfied at any time you may cancel your subscription with no further obligation.

(Beyond that, as I see it, you're only other alternative is to only wear mu-mu's so as not to ensure no offense by the other residents).

Good luck.

 

[Zigner]

(Beyond that, as I see it, you're only other alternative is to only wear mu-mu's so as not to ensure no offense by the other residents).

If the OP is as nice looking as she says she is, I'D be offended by a mu-mu!

 

[Antigone*]

In a simply amazing stroke of good luck, I happen to run a bathing suit screening company. For a limited time only, I can offer you a 30 day free trial which works as follows:
- We provide you with your own confidential, unique email address
- You then have 30 days during which you can forward photos of yourself in as many bathing suits as you need opinions on. (We accept all standard file formats).
- Opinions as to the suits are returned to the email address of your choosing within 24 hours.

We do not take your credit card information and there is nothing to buy. If you are dissatisfied at any time you may cancel your subscription with no further obligation.

(Beyond that, as I see it, you're only other alternative is to only wear mu-mu's so as not to ensure no offense by the other residents).

Good luck.

Hmmm...I'm not sure if this is you being a savvy business man or you just being a plain old man

 

[TigerD]

Hmmm...I'm not sure if this is you being a savvy business man or you just being a plain old man

Definitely a savvy business man -- I wish I'd thought of it first.

DC

 

[Cvillecpm]

Your suit was inappropriate and the life guard was appropriate in requesting you to change or cover up.

Join a private swim club or buy your own house with a pool surrounded by a fence....I suspect the "thrill would be gone then"!

 

[Antigone*]

Definitely a savvy business man -- I wish I'd thought of it first.

DC

what would we do without you guy...huh

 

[Cheeseknife]

Of course, she'd probably be complaining of harrassment if guys she considered ugly were the ones oggling her half naked.

 

[Zigner]

Honestly, we don't KNOW that she is good looking. She says she is "athletic" and "fit". Watch some old footage from the Olympics. There were tons (literally!) of athletic and fit Russians!