interstate designated adoption

[knkb]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Ny

A friend of mine just found out she is pregnant with her 4th child. Both her and the father of this baby have agreed to allow me to adopt the child. They live in Ky and I live in Ny. I've tried researching the process online but I come up with info on the interstate adoption and info on the designated adoptions seperately. I'd like to know if there is a way to handle this ourselves as neither of us really have the money for an attorney, nor do we think it would be necessary as we are all in agreement. Is there a form that they can sign at birth or before hand to allow me to take the baby home to ny right after birth? Is a home study still necessary (I am a mother of 3 already)? Is there going to be a waiting period? If so, is it possible for them to just sign full custody over to me in the meantime?

Thank you for your time.

 

[Proserpina]

You should NOT do this without an attorney.

Adoption is never a DIY project. If you really want this child, then the cost of the adoption attorney is nothing in the long run.

Do it right.

 

[knkb]

I understand the recommendation of an adoption attorney.
Is it required that both myself and the birth parents hire attornies?
Is there a way to cut down on the cost of the attorney by handling any of it privately?

what ever happened to a simple form the parents sign in the hospital right after the baby is born and the adoptive family gets to walk out with the baby case closed? lol

 

[nextwife]

You definitely need an attorney. If you have a somewhat recent homestudy from a prior adoption, it may be possible to have it updated, so that you don't need a whole new one for this adoption. But simply having parented is not all that a home study includes, the adoptive parent needs to also demonstrate they are financially stable and have the resources to support the child, a safe stable environment, pass fingerprint and police checks and so on.

 

[knkb]

well the home study shouldn't really be an issue. I'm sure everything will check out alright.
I was really just trying to get a feel for the easiest, best way to go about this. Being that she is a friend of mine would it make anything easier legally if they just gave me custody at first and finalized everything later on?

Again thank you for your advice.

 

[nextwife]

well the home study shouldn't really be an issue. I'm sure everything will check out alright.
I was really just trying to get a feel for the easiest, best way to go about this. Being that she is a friend of mine would it make anything easier legally if they just gave me custody at first and finalized everything later on?

Again thank you for your advice.

Honestly, if you really care about the child's future and stability, you will get the legal process going now so this can be done right, and the matter legally completed as soon as possible. Don't neglect the legal necessities. Do it right from the get go.

The home study cost is miniscule compared to what one usually pays to complete a non relative adoption.

 

[stealth2]

Seriously - y'all need to figure out how to afford an attorney. Even if just to make sure all the "i"s are dotted and "t"s are crossed.

 

[momofrose]

well the home study shouldn't really be an issue. I'm sure everything will check out alright.
I was really just trying to get a feel for the easiest, best way to go about this. Being that she is a friend of mine would it make anything easier legally if they just gave me custody at first and finalized everything later on?

Again thank you for your advice.

The only thing about it being easier is that you have matched each other - possible adoptive parents and possible birthmom.

Update your home study and get an attorney - the fees should not be that bad (relatively speaking)..the possible borthmom should have her own attorney or at the very least a birth parent advocate.

 

[nextwife]

The only thing about it being easier is that you have matched each other - possible adoptive parents and possible birthmom.

Update your home study and get an attorney - the fees should not be that bad (relatively speaking)..the possible birthmom should have her own attorney or at the very least a birth parent advocate.

I'd suggest that BOTH birthparents be represented by counsel, or have advocates. I'd want the adoption completed as soon as possible and no opportunity for the child's life to be later disrupted because adoptive mom didn't get her legal ducks in a row. "Just get custody and go, and deal with all the other stuff later" is a plan for disaster.

If, in fact, the cost of a home study is truly a problem for you, you should rethink your financial readiness to do this adoption. Else, get on with it and start preparing. The home study can be applied to any domestic adoption, even if this falls through.