just mentally tired

[shari36]

What is the name of your state? Oregon

Im going to court May 25 for custody,parenting time and support.. The other parent has been absent for nine years.. He served me papers and started the ball rolling. Since all this has started he is still not doing anything to show he is interested in a relationship with the child. Seven months after being served (with no contact or CS during these seven months) My son went to the bios for spring break. He did not want to go it was very upsetting for him. He spent Five days there. Well it is May now and still no phone call to my son.. I ask my son if he would like to call and say hi to the bio man.. He says no not right now. How can I expect this child to be able to adjust to this major change in his life when the bio is still not showing any interest.. It seems it can only be on the bio mans terms and we (my son and I should just hang around to accomadate him when he feels he has time.
Do I have any other options in this matter??
Shari

 

[Inquiry123]

Here's a bump...

Is the child 9? Have YOU had any contact with "bio man" over the nine years of absence?

Any idea why he's stepping back into the picture, now? It seems odd that he would "get the ball rolling" without a meaningul reason. Maybe there is a meaningful reason (change of heart, maturity, responsibility.)

That's nice that you asked bio-boy about calling...I don't think it's unusual that he declined...I'm sure that the whole thing would be akward for everyone involved. Nine years is a long time. You will get several responses regarding steps that you could take to continue the bio-ball rolling if that's what you think would ultimately be in the child's best interest.

Any other options? You'll have to go to the hearing. You should be prepared for the judge to order custody, support, and a set visitation schedule. Don't be distressed if the visitation schedule seems very liberal in spite of the nine years. In the end, it will be up to bioman to actually exercise those visitation rights. Good luck with your situation.