WittyUserName
Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Idaho
Still negotiating a visitation plan with my daughter's father. We were never married, Dad moved 600 miles away when she was an infant, daughter is now 6 yo and has lived her entire life in Idaho. Paternity was established and support orders have been in place since 2003. Custody and visitation never formally addressed, because Dad's visitation has only happened 3 weekends/year when he came to visit here.
Dad and I are now trying to work out a visitation plan, and have come up with a schedule we can agree on - Daughter will travel to his state of residence to see him every other Spring Break, every Thanksgiving, half of Christmas break (alternating each year), and Father's Day weekend. She'll also have a 4-week stay with him in the summer.
(Do I love the idea? No. It's unnerving. But this schedule is in line with what I've seen ordered in other states, and my understanding is that this is likely what Dad could successfully argue for anyway. So I'm taking my emotions out of the equation and getting behind a plan I’m hoping a judge would consider to be fair. I do indeed love my kid far more than I hate my ex, which is the best advice I've gotten yet.)
Now Dad is arguing that I should be responsible for half the transportation costs between my residence and his. Based on what I've seen time and again here on this forum (the one who creates the distance is generally responsible for travel expenses) I think this is unreasonable.
If in future I moved away to another state, and created additional distance, then I would be happy to share the cost with him. That's fair. But he unilaterally made the initial move knowing he had a daughter and that he was moving away from her.
Are there circumstances under which I might be ordered to pay for half these transportation costs?
Thanks for your help.
Still negotiating a visitation plan with my daughter's father. We were never married, Dad moved 600 miles away when she was an infant, daughter is now 6 yo and has lived her entire life in Idaho. Paternity was established and support orders have been in place since 2003. Custody and visitation never formally addressed, because Dad's visitation has only happened 3 weekends/year when he came to visit here.
Dad and I are now trying to work out a visitation plan, and have come up with a schedule we can agree on - Daughter will travel to his state of residence to see him every other Spring Break, every Thanksgiving, half of Christmas break (alternating each year), and Father's Day weekend. She'll also have a 4-week stay with him in the summer.
(Do I love the idea? No. It's unnerving. But this schedule is in line with what I've seen ordered in other states, and my understanding is that this is likely what Dad could successfully argue for anyway. So I'm taking my emotions out of the equation and getting behind a plan I’m hoping a judge would consider to be fair. I do indeed love my kid far more than I hate my ex, which is the best advice I've gotten yet.)
Now Dad is arguing that I should be responsible for half the transportation costs between my residence and his. Based on what I've seen time and again here on this forum (the one who creates the distance is generally responsible for travel expenses) I think this is unreasonable.
If in future I moved away to another state, and created additional distance, then I would be happy to share the cost with him. That's fair. But he unilaterally made the initial move knowing he had a daughter and that he was moving away from her.
Are there circumstances under which I might be ordered to pay for half these transportation costs?
Thanks for your help.
From what I've found in my research, typically the parent creating the distance is the one responsible for the transportation costs. That is, unless you agree to split the costs. It's the NCP's right to move, but not to force you to pay for his decision to create the distance. Again, I don't know Idaho law, but I'm sure if you Google it, you can find it 
