MrsLacy04

[CSO286]

no child support, no visitation

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What is the name of your state (Arkansas)?

My ex BOYFRIEND and I have been seperated almost 4 years now, our son has to go over there every weekend until he is 4 which in turn will be everyother weekend friday at 5pm to sunday at 5pm. My ex has not consecutively paid since September 2010 and it our court documents it states that if the non costodial parent does not pay for a full year I have the right to take him back and request taking visitation away. I have always let him see my son, switched our whole weekends around so that he can see him on the random days he requests. My husband and I work all week and the weekend is the only time that we have to see our son. there are numerous other things that he has done but my main one is this. I have sent letters, phone calls and still he has not caught up. is there anything that I can do you think or am I just out of luck?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last edited by mrslacy04; Today at 11:30 AM.



Today, 11:13 AM
Zigner
Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 33,951

Head back to court. At THIS point in time, you must still make the child available for the court-ordered visitation.
__________________
*
*

Today, 11:14 AM
Antigone*of*Greece
Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: In honor of JetX ~ Somnambulist University
Posts: 14,152

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrslacy04
What is the name of your state (Arkansas)?

My ex BOYFRIEND and I have been seperated almost 4 years now, our son has to go over there every weekend until he is 4 which in turn will be everyother weekend friday at 5pm to sunday at 5pm. My ex has not consecutively paid since September 2010 and it our court documents it states that if the non costodial parent does not pay for a full year I have the right to take him back and request taking visitation away. I have always let him see my son, switched our whole weekends around so that he can see him on the random days he requests. My husband and I work all week and the weekend is the only time that we have to see our son. there are numerous other things that he has done but my main one is this. I have sent letters, phone calls and still he has not caught up. is there anything that I can do you think and win or am I just out of luck?

So, you want to stop the child seeing his father because he does not pay support? You really want to do that to your child?

Does the child's father work?
__________________
ΣΒΔ


Today, 11:22 AM
mrslacy04
Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 3

Yes he works, he just got a new job and just moved for the 8th time since we went to court last. I would like to take my son away if it is what is best and that is what I believe. If you would have read the post you would see there is more that I am not focusing on, this is my question now about the support. My son does not like going over there and has told me crying to take him home. so yes I do want him to be away from my son.


Today, 11:26 AM
Antigone*of*Greece
Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: In honor of JetX ~ Somnambulist University
Posts: 14,152

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrslacy04
Yes he works, he just got a new job and just moved for the 8th time since we went to court last. I would like to take my son away if it is what is best and that is what I believe. If you would have read the post you would see there is more that I am not focusing on, this is my question now about the support. My son does not like going over there and has told me crying to take him home. so yes I do want him to be away from my son.

Yes, I read your post, and you want to make your husband daddy. At this point according to what you have posted it has not been a year yet.

When that time comes, file your petition.
__________________

Today, 11:31 AM
mistoffolees
Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 13,654

Quote:
Originally Posted by mrslacy04
Yes he works, he just got a new job and just moved for the 8th time since we went to court last. I would like to take my son away if it is what is best and that is what I believe. If you would have read the post you would see there is more that I am not focusing on, this is my question now about the support. My son does not like going over there and has told me crying to take him home. so yes I do want him to be away from my son.

Your son will do what you tell him to do. 99% of the time, if you're not stirring up trouble, kids willingly go to visit the other parent. Kids who "do not like going over there" are almost always responding to what a parent is feeding them.

Your job is to facilitate a relationship between the child and his father - not to interfere with that relationship.

Time to grow up and start doing what's best for the child (which is almost always having a solid relationship with both parents).


Today, 11:35 AM
mrslacy04
Junior Member Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 3

My husband has been more of a father than my ex has. Explain to me why you think you need to be rude to a random person asking for help and advice. I did not ask you to be an a$$^%# to me I asked for anyone to help. You do not know my situation and have no right to assume things. I thank you for your opinion but there is no reason to be a jerk.

 

[CSO286]

Don't delete just because you don't like what you hear.

 

[Antigone*]

Don't delete just because you don't like what you hear.

How funny ~ I wasn't even being rude... yet

 

[mrslacy04]

I am not deleting b/c of you, I got the info I was looking for and I don't need your opinion anymore. I understand that people have this fixed idea that I am putting it into my childs head that his father is horrible or whatever you would like to think. I don't, when my son tells me something about them I listen and say how fun or ask him to explain more but 99% of the time it is no one played with me, I sat in my room all day, they yell at eachother and he tells me that they use bad words at eachother. so I appriciate all of the advice that everyone has given me. Thank you very much.
Thank you Zigner, a simple what do you think answer is all i needed. Not all of the bashing that you all have given so I again thank you for your advice.

 

[Antigone*]

I am not deleting b/c of you, I got the info I was looking for and I don't need your opinion anymore. I understand that people have this fixed idea that I am putting it into my childs head that his father is horrible or whatever you would like to think. I don't, when my son tells me something about them I listen and say how fun or ask him to explain more but 99% of the time it is no one played with me, I sat in my room all day, they yell at eachother and he tells me that they use bad words at eachother. so I appriciate all of the advice that everyone has given me. Thank you very much.
Thank you Zigner, a simple what do you think answer is all i needed. Not all of the bashing that you all have given so I again thank you for your advice.

Well, you don't have to worry about the thread's deletion. It's been recovered and can now help to answer possible questions for other posters who may have similar situations.

 

[CSO286]

I am not deleting b/c of you, I got the info I was looking for and I don't need your opinion anymore. I understand that people have this fixed idea that I am putting it into my childs head that his father is horrible or whatever you would like to think. I don't, when my son tells me something about them I listen and say how fun or ask him to explain more but 99% of the time it is no one played with me, I sat in my room all day, they yell at eachother and he tells me that they use bad words at eachother. so I appriciate all of the advice that everyone has given me. Thank you very much.
Thank you Zigner, a simple what do you think answer is all i needed. Not all of the bashing that you all have given so I again thank you for your advice.

Yes, well, a four year old will also say, "They didn't feed me" when he didn't get the pudding cup he wanted. Do you also believe he was starved?

He is four. I rather doubt that no one enaged with him for a entire day/weekend visit. Think about it, lady.

In addition, he is a boy.....Boys aren't overly detail oriented. I have a four year old nephew. I ran up to the grocery store for twenty minutes and left him with Small; they were in the front yard. I came back to see body outline of both of them, a rainbow and a funny looking sun drawn on my driveway. Ask nephew what he and Small did? "Nuthin'." Of course, based on the chalk art in my driveway, they played and drew pictures....

Be reasonable.

 

[mistoffolees]

I am not deleting b/c of you, I got the info I was looking for and I don't need your opinion anymore. I understand that people have this fixed idea that I am putting it into my childs head that his father is horrible or whatever you would like to think. I don't, when my son tells me something about them I listen and say how fun or ask him to explain more but 99% of the time it is no one played with me, I sat in my room all day, they yell at eachother and he tells me that they use bad words at eachother. so I appriciate all of the advice that everyone has given me. Thank you very much.

I feel really sorry for your child. You're putting him in a position where every word out of his 4 year old mouth throws you into a tizzy - and you then overreact and try to sever the relationship with his father on the basis of hearsay. Sad, really sad.

And go ahead and tell the court that your new BF/husband/bedwarmer/whatever is more of a father to the child than the real father. Watch how fast you get slapped down.

 

[Ohiogal]

I am not deleting b/c of you, I got the info I was looking for and I don't need your opinion anymore. I understand that people have this fixed idea that I am putting it into my childs head that his father is horrible or whatever you would like to think. I don't, when my son tells me something about them I listen and say how fun or ask him to explain more but 99% of the time it is no one played with me, I sat in my room all day, they yell at eachother and he tells me that they use bad words at eachother. so I appriciate all of the advice that everyone has given me. Thank you very much.
Thank you Zigner, a simple what do you think answer is all i needed. Not all of the bashing that you all have given so I again thank you for your advice.

The time to choose daddy was when you chose who you allowed to insert their penis into your vagina. The idea of taking visitation away -- it is unconstitutional and quite frankly unenforceable.
Just because you have a new sex partner doesn't mean that person becomes daddy.