Need some emergency help....

[brisgirl825]

What is the name of your state?I'm in MO and my ex is in Ks.

Just some background info:
After we moved to Mo, my ex decided that it would be best to give up his rights to the children. This decision was made in the first week of Jan. this year.
The last day of Jan, my daughter was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. The ex was informed and chose not to go to the hospital or to take the classes, offered by the hospital during that stay and the other mandatory classes that happened in Feb. We(my ex and I) agreed that since he was giving up his rights anyway and that he didn't take classes, it was ok for Makayla to not go to any visits.
So here we are with a new situation. He has decided now, after we let him know we had retained an atty for the adoption, he no longer wishes to tpr. This is due to the fact that our atty old us that we shouldn't put in the adoption/tpr papers to forgive his arrears and past due medical bills. My ex wanted it all done at the same time so as not to be "screwed" by us. The atty said that it could be seen as paying off BD for the adoption.
The ex now wants to have Makayla on visits. He has NO idea how to take care of her. At the risk of sounding like a typical female, is there anyway a judge would give him supervised visits, atleast until he learns to take care of her? He hasn't seen her in Dec. '04 and she just turned four y/o.

Thanks,

 

[Zephyr]

you could certainly ask for your lawyer to file a motion requesting supervised visits due to the fact that dad does not understand how to deal with her medical condition. I actually think that would be the wisest thing to do regardless of tpr or not until dad attends those classes, his ignorance could lead to her ending up back in the hospital... or worse...

 

[brisgirl825]

you could certainly ask for your lawyer to file a motion requesting supervised visits due to the fact that dad does not understand how to deal with her medical condition. I actually think that would be the wisest thing to do regardless of tpr or not until dad attends those classes, his ignorance could lead to her ending up back in the hospital... or worse...

Can I file that in Mo? Or do I need to go to KS?

Thanks

 

[stealth2]

I suspect you would need to file in KS, if that is the state that currently holds jurisdiction.

 

[tigger22472]

Can I file that in Mo? Or do I need to go to KS?

Thanks

You will likely have to file it where the original court order holds jurisdiction.

Is there any way that your lawyer has suggested that the TPR and adoption could be done to ease bio's fear? What I mean is can he draw something up that would be legal to waive these things without them being considered by the presiding judge? My other thought on that is that if bio is agreeing to this the judge would likely grant it regardless of his feelings on it. It's perfectly legal for you to waive these fees per your agreement. IMO the judge may comment them but if dad is present at the hearing then the judge will probably explain it to him also and just make sure he understands. Other then that I don't really see the judge denying it. Even judges know you can't make someone be a parent that doesn't want to be.

 

[brisgirl825]

You will likely have to file it where the original court order holds jurisdiction.

Is there any way that your lawyer has suggested that the TPR and adoption could be done to ease bio's fear? What I mean is can he draw something up that would be legal to waive these things without them being considered by the presiding judge? My other thought on that is that if bio is agreeing to this the judge would likely grant it regardless of his feelings on it. It's perfectly legal for you to waive these fees per your agreement. IMO the judge may comment them but if dad is present at the hearing then the judge will probably explain it to him also and just make sure he understands. Other then that I don't really see the judge denying it. Even judges know you can't make someone be a parent that doesn't want to be.

We called our atty and he said that he would put in a call to BD. I hope that it will ease his fears. We want this to be done just as much as he does.

I will certainly talk to the atty about your suggestions.

 

[Rushia]

Oh honey, after what happened the other month and the two of you went to the classes! I highly doubt the judge would even look at you cross eyed if you denied visitation. File a modification immediately!!!

Since I can't pm you. I got the pics--SO CUTE!! Big hugs to you guys!!

 

[brisgirl825]

Oh honey, after what happened the other month and the two of you went to the classes! I highly doubt the judge would even look at you cross eyed if you denied visitation. File a modification immediately!!!

Since I can't pm you. I got the pics--SO CUTE!! Big hugs to you guys!!

We'll be making a trip to Ks on Thursday. Hopefully, everything will go smoothly.

I'm glad you like the pics! Hope you all are doing well! *hugs*!

 

[Rushia]

We'll be making a trip to Ks on Thursday. Hopefully, everything will go smoothly.

I'm glad you like the pics! Hope you all are doing well! *hugs*!

Good Luck!!!!!

 

[titansfan]

we're not in kansas anymore

if you see dorothy and toto fly by, run like hell!

 

[SMURFEELAW]

As fate would have it my husband and I were just discussing this forgiveness of CS for adoption last night. My husband received custody of my step-daughter in Oct. 2004 and he is trying to get an order for CS (although even the Judge told him he would never see any $$ when he told my husband to file) we were thinking that if the amount were high enough mom probably would sign over rights for a forgiveness of debt. I commented that in that case it shouldn't even be considered selling/buying rights because what I as the adoptive parent would be stating is I have been here supporting bith emotionally and financially this child since before my husband had custody that I am assuming that debt I am telling the Court that I consider it my responsibility towards raising what will after the adoption be my child. If I were you I would try asking you lawyer if that would work and then that would settle your ex's fears b/c they could be done together. Just a suggestion and Good Luck to you and yours.

 

[chloesmommy1972]

I am in a kind of similiar boat. My 6 yo daughter was just diagnosed with type one diabetes. My ex was rarelt present at the hospital but her did eventually take his classes. I have let him have my daughter but he did not follow her insulin therapy or her meal plan. I am trying to get his visiation limited. I am interested in how much luck you have had getting action taken due to your daughters illness.

 

[brisgirl825]

As luck would have it, he decided, again, to go through with the SP adoption. The atty was able to call him and they agreed that adding a letter of intent re the satisfaction of arrears, would ease his fears. So, there was no need to get a hearing for supervised visits.
I would think that since your ex took the classes, they wouldn't scale back his visits. He's going to make mistakes and things are going to happen. However, you should contact an atty and ask them for their opinion.

GL.