non-custodial parent taking visitation of non-handicap children, but not handicapped

[kebmeister]

I am a non-custodial father in Illinois wanting to take my 2 boys, age 14 & 16 to a concert this weekend. The problem is, my daughter (12) is profoundly retarded, would not benefit from the weekend and would in fact have a lousy weekend...(camping in the rain, cold, no bathrooms etc....) My question is, can I take just the boys for 1 weekend, or could my ex deny visitation with the boys if I refuse to take my daughter? It will be for 1 weekend only. We believe in as much inclusion as possible for daughter, but I think this would be a hardship on her. My ex would only be glad that it's a hardship on me.

[Edited by kebmeister on 04-26-2001 at 12:05 AM]

 

[truth is powerful]

Does your daughter have an ongoing relationship with a respite care provider? If she has a regular care provider like relative or at school why not ask that person if their services may be avaliable during part of the time that weekend. Maybe you ex would be willing to providing care herself if she knew that she would have a break that you bothered to initiate. Ask for a list of people she would agree upon. Maybe you could offer to take your daughter alone sometime to something she would enjoy more like an amusment park or something more her speed and to spend time on that relationship too. I dont think anyone can force you to visit but special needs children require a lot of work and a lot of love.