nonpayments

[hrichards2]

What is the name of your state? North Dakota

I have been to court with my ex-husband 4 or 5 times now. He has had 3 contempt of court charges now for failure to pay child support. He has been through 4 jobs in the last 4 years, of some, I believe he voluntarily quit. I am getting sick of going to court for this. Each time he has been at least 6000 behind and has never made a "full" payment according to the divorce decree. He was ordered to pay 415 a month plus 100 for insurance, which I was paying because he got "fired" from his job and lost insurance. After that, he failed to pay support for 2-1/2 yrs. Did not work more than probably 6 months during this time. Thus, first contempt order for 7000 dollars. I then received payments of about 3/4 of what he was supposed to pay for about 8 months. He then again lost his job. I didn't receive anything for another 4 or 5 months, if I did, it was about 50 dollars a month. We went back to court for another 3000 dollars owed. Finally, in February of this year, I took him back for 5000+ dollars owed. The day after the court hearing, the judge found him in contempt, he lost his job, again. Then, a month later, he took me to court and got the support lowered to 150 dollars a month, down from 515 plus arrearages, because he was going to school and could not work.

How do I get this cycle to end? I have full custody and he refuses to pay. He will pay for 2 or 3 months, in little bits, and then, all of a sudden, he loses his job. He gets cash direct from the GI bill for school, which is almost 1300 a month, and has to opportunity to work at least 30-40 hours a week, plus school, but he refuses. Please help in this matter. I am at wits end as to what to do. I go to court and he gets contempt, but never pays that.

Also, this year, he tried to claim one of the kids on his tax return and it was returned to me. He has no right to file nor have I given him any permission. He pulls stunts like this and seems to always get away with it. I am not greedy and am in it for the money, but I am sick of him not having to work and just having his hand slapped in court. His contempt of court charge was on 02/14/08 and the child support was reduced to 208 per month starting 03/01/08. I have received 90 dollars since 02/05/08 and he still has not paid the contempt charge of over 4000 dollars. What do i do?

Angry and confused

 

[OhReally?]

Unfortunately, it appears this guy is enjoying making your life a living hell. You're going to have to keep on taking him to court. I certainly hope each time you are asking for all court costs, attorney's fees and other monetary damages (lost income, travel etc) to be awarded to you as well.

Perhaps you need to start requesting jail time, since I am sure that part of the penalty of non-payment is jail time, as well as fines. I would also request that the court order him to pay a purge BEFORE he leaves the court OR he goes straight to jail.

 

[hrichards2]

thanks for the info

I have. We have been to court 8 times now and he has only shown up 3 times. He always gets away with stuff and nothing ever happens to him. Frustrating because guys who try always get hosed and those who don't do anything get away with everything. I am about to go for criminal charges soon. Even thought about the possibility of taking assets. He has 2 cars and I know he gets money under the table somehow, but can't prove it. He is only hurting the kids and his relationship with them. My daughter is old enough to figure things out, now, so he better reconsider. He obviously doesn't realize there are costs to raising children!

 

[Humusluvr]

Unfortunately, it appears this guy is enjoying making your life a living hell. You're going to have to keep on taking him to court. I certainly hope each time you are asking for all court costs, attorney's fees and other monetary damages (lost income, travel etc) to be awarded to you as well.

Perhaps you need to start requesting jail time, since I am sure that part of the penalty of non-payment is jail time, as well as fines. I would also request that the court order him to pay a purge BEFORE he leaves the court OR he goes straight to jail.

Unfortunately, it is hard to squeeze blood from a turnip - if you know what I mean. A person who is determined not to pay support will almost certainly weasel their way out of paying other fee's as well. Y

 

[gooddad54]

What is the name of your state? North Dakota

I have been to court with my ex-husband 4 or 5 times now. He has had 3 contempt of court charges now for failure to pay child support. He has been through 4 jobs in the last 4 years, of some, I believe he voluntarily quit. I am getting sick of going to court for this. Each time he has been at least 6000 behind and has never made a "full" payment according to the divorce decree. He was ordered to pay 415 a month plus 100 for insurance, which I was paying because he got "fired" from his job and lost insurance. After that, he failed to pay support for 2-1/2 yrs. Did not work more than probably 6 months during this time. Thus, first contempt order for 7000 dollars. I then received payments of about 3/4 of what he was supposed to pay for about 8 months. He then again lost his job. I didn't receive anything for another 4 or 5 months, if I did, it was about 50 dollars a month. We went back to court for another 3000 dollars owed. Finally, in February of this year, I took him back for 5000+ dollars owed. The day after the court hearing, the judge found him in contempt, he lost his job, again. Then, a month later, he took me to court and got the support lowered to 150 dollars a month, down from 515 plus arrearages, because he was going to school and could not work.

How do I get this cycle to end? I have full custody and he refuses to pay. He will pay for 2 or 3 months, in little bits, and then, all of a sudden, he loses his job. He gets cash direct from the GI bill for school, which is almost 1300 a month, and has to opportunity to work at least 30-40 hours a week, plus school, but he refuses. Please help in this matter. I am at wits end as to what to do. I go to court and he gets contempt, but never pays that.

Also, this year, he tried to claim one of the kids on his tax return and it was returned to me. He has no right to file nor have I given him any permission. He pulls stunts like this and seems to always get away with it. I am not greedy and am in it for the money, but I am sick of him not having to work and just having his hand slapped in court. His contempt of court charge was on 02/14/08 and the child support was reduced to 208 per month starting 03/01/08. I have received 90 dollars since 02/05/08 and he still has not paid the contempt charge of over 4000 dollars. What do i do?

Angry and confused

I feel he is playing the system and YOU should seek legal advice. You have a case and he SHOULD support the children...

 

[LdiJ]

The reality of things is that someone who is seriously determined NOT to support their children, will get away with it. However, at the same time, they will destroy their own financial lives and their own financial future. They will never be able to own any assets, and they will be seriously poor old people, and they may even spend some time in jail.

However, unless they realize that they are hurting themselves just as much as they are hurting their children, the worst of them won't change.

I have a self employed tax client who deliberately UNDERSTATES his expenses every year and pays more income and self employment tax than he is obligated to pay. Why? Because he has an uncle who was in the same line of work, who overstated expenses every year, who is now livng in abject poverty because he didn't earn any social security credits and didn't plan for retirement.....because his uncle didn't want to pay child support or taxes.

 

[hrichards2]

thanks!

Yes, he has 3 contempt charges and it has been 3 months since the last one, included an audit by the IRS, which he still has not paid on. He then comes back at me and says I am greedy and all I am in it for is the money. If that was the case, I would have dropped it years ago, but he needs to grow up and face reality; that he can't keep running, but, some people just don't understand. Thanks for the reply, I appreciate it!

 

[Humusluvr]

Yes, he has 3 contempt charges and it has been 3 months since the last one, included an audit by the IRS, which he still has not paid on. He then comes back at me and says I am greedy and all I am in it for is the money. If that was the case, I would have dropped it years ago, but he needs to grow up and face reality; that he can't keep running, but, some people just don't understand. Thanks for the reply, I appreciate it!

You know, if we could support our children on kisses and rainbows, then I'm sure all parents would. Until that happens, children need to be supported. That is why we have judges, contempt charges, and jail time.

 

[payyourcs]

I feel for you. Unfortunately our court sytem is not helping matters when it comes to dead beat dads like ours. I say, save your money as he is not worth paying a lawyer for. You need your hard earned money to raise those kids. If you can take him to court with out paying a lawyer, you are saving yourself a ton of money. Have the courts made you pay for court fee's and such? I always wondered how that works when you do a contempt charge and judgement on your own.
The only only thing I can say is never ever ever count on him paying child support. When you do get some, great, it's like putting money in savings! You are the better parent and your kids will see what a piece of dirt he really is without you telling them.

 

[hrichards2]

court charges

Actually, my lawyer has been pretty good. She has never charged me until I receive something from him and then she just takes it out and, really, her charges have not been that drastic. I guess if I have to keep taking him, it is worth it because then, like you said, I have savings in the bank. It is just really frustrating in the meantime. Thanks for all the posts!

 

[hrichards2]

kisses and rainbows

I totally agree and that is the way he thinks about stuff. He sent me an email the other day about being greedy and to stop worrying about the money and think of the best interest of the kids. For god sakes, lol. I told him I have been and I am not the least bit concerned about the money, I don't get it anyways, so why worry? I just want the point across that he cannot run forever and he will be paying for the kids until he is paid up. I don't think he realizes that. That is the most frustrating aspect and to think he just comes to get them every now and then so he can keep track of how long or how many days during the year he has them in hopes of being able to claim one of them for his taxes. That is pure disgusting.