Paternity or Adoption? MI Please Help!

[florasharon]

My 23 year old son became involved with a woman 12 years older than him when he was 17 years old and working as a busboy while in his senior year of high school. After seeing her for a few times she informed him that she was pregnant(not by him). She had an abortion. Weeks went by and she returned to her doctor to find that she was pregnant. The dr assumed that it was the same pregnancy and the abortion was not performed correctly. She said that the father was a man that she briefly was involved with before she began her relationship with my son. My son stayed with her, helped support her, and made a personal committment to treat her child as his own. The child was born prematurely. For the next six months she insisted that the child was not my son's. However, after filing a lawsuit against the dr who performed the abortion, the attorney presented her with test results on the placenta that are performed in premature births. The test showed that the pregnancy was not far enough along to have been the child of the man she originally claimed was the father. Then she said that my son must have been the father. According to my calculations, with the age of the placenta, that still could not have been possible. Nevertheless, my son was willing to accept that and continue to be father to the child. I also had been an acting grandmother and loved the child very much. Since my son was only a busboy and by this time was in college, the mother refused to allow his name to be listed on the birth certificate. She said that she need money from welfare to get by, as well as the money he was giving her each week. For three years he lived with her and continued to give her money each week. Then she broke things off with him and he found out that she had been seeing someone else. He has continued giving her support for the child for the past two years, as well as buying the child clothes and such. He has the child every other weekend. Now she wants to get married in March and says she wants him to sign a paternity paper stating that he is the biological father so that her soon to be husband will not be responsible for the support of the child. Here lies the dilemma. If he does this, will the State of Michigan find this out and force him to pay all the back welfare that she received, as well as the hospital bills for the birth of the child. We suggested adoption instead, but she says that would take too long and she doesn't have enough time before her marriage.
I have put four calls into attorneys today and all have told me that they will have to get back with me. One even acted like my son was crazy for even considering this since he is not sure if he is the real father. He ( and I) do not want to lose this child that has been part of our family for almost five years. We love him whether he is my son's child or not. Please someone help us!

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

She sounds like a real "golddigger", but unless your son can prove, in court, that he's the father, then she can do whatever she likes with the child. As of right now, your son (and you) have no rights.

My suggestion would be to file a Paternity action against her, and have the court order a Paternity test. If it's possitive, then he'll have all the necessary rights - - including paying child support. If negative, your son moves on, and so does she.

Do not sign anything until such time as a court directs him to do so.

IAAL