paying support when ex is self employed

[myelumia]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I have been paying my Ex support $800/mo for 2 kids, we share 50/50 custody. My son has been in private school, tuition is nearly $700. We used to split this 50/50, but once I remarried, she says she can no longer afford for this school year. Our agreement is an arrangement that we worked out without court and lawyers.

My issue is that she is self employed, and claims to make nothing (like 5K a year). That being said, she rents an $1800 house and drives a Lexus ( I beleive her ex boyfriend is paying - is that income??) Using the support calculator on line and assign her CA min wage (only option for impuned income) it comes out right at $800, and reduces 1/2 of the tuition I pay. If I decide that I need to talk to the family law facilitator, will they be able to attribute a more realistic income? she has a lic for real estate appraisal and runs an on-line retail operation. I also believe she makes jewelry for cash. She has an on-line dating profile that states she makes between 50-75K. going to Salary.com, the rank appraisers at 39K-58K/yr (10th percentile - 90th percentile) Granted, my household has a greater income, but I still feel as though she is taking advantage of her self employment.

I don't want this to be ugly and cause an issue with my kids, but I need this to change as I work in sales. I have a fixed salary plus bonus. My Last year's income has been used to calculate my part, but there is no guarantee I will make any more than my base salary which causes real cash flow problems. I only have 1/2 year more of tuition, which will help. Do you have any suggestions? Thnaks in advance.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[CourtClerk]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I have been paying my Ex support $800/mo for 2 kids, we share 50/50 custody.

Is the support by court order or private agreement?

My son has been in private school, tuition is nearly $700. We used to split this 50/50, but once I remarried, she says she can no longer afford for this school year. Our agreement is an arrangement that we worked out without court and lawyers.

Ok, then disregard my previous question....

My issue is that she is self employed, and claims to make nothing (like 5K a year). That being said, she rents an $1800 house and drives a Lexus ( I beleive her ex boyfriend is paying - is that income??)

Her boyfriend's income is not HER income. If her boyfriend pays the rent and bought her a car... that is not HER income. It's money he's choosing to spend on her.

Using the support calculator on line and assign her CA min wage (only option for impuned income)

No it's not. However, if she's self employed, are you reducing her income by business expenses, self employment taxes, etc.?

it comes out right at $800, and reduces 1/2 of the tuition I pay.

Quite honestly, she's not required to split the private school tuition if the court didn't order her to do so. She would be required to split the cost of any extended day care (if it can be divided from the tuition), but NOT the cost of tuition. Private schooling is not mandatory.

If I decide that I need to talk to the family law facilitator, will they be able to attribute a more realistic income?

The family law facilitator cannot make the decision to impute and income to anyone. That's a bench officer's decision.... solely.

she has a lic for real estate appraisal

Don't know if you noticed, but the real estate market sucks right about now.

and runs an on-line retail operation.

The economy sucks right now also

I also believe she makes jewelry for cash.

A belief is not proof, which is what you need in court.

She has an on-line dating profile that states she makes between 50-75K.

Now that's a first. An online dating profile where someone lies. I happened upon a Myspace profile to someone I know who said he makes the same amount of money. I happen to KNOW that this person is currently unemployed and has been for the better part of this whole year. What's your point?

going to Salary.com, the rank appraisers at 39K-58K/yr (10th percentile - 90th percentile)

If you can PROVE she's making that... great.

Granted, my household has a greater income, but I still feel as though she is taking advantage of her self employment.

Of course, the economy has nothing to do with it.

I don't want this to be ugly and cause an issue with my kids, but I need this to change as I work in sales. I have a fixed salary plus bonus. My Last year's income has been used to calculate my part, but there is no guarantee I will make any more than my base salary which causes real cash flow problems.

Everyone is having cash flow problems in CA.

I only have 1/2 year more of tuition, which will help. Do you have any suggestions?

Put the child in a good public school. It will save you $800/mo.

 

[myelumia]

Clearly I need to elaborate more.

When we were married, my ex had a job where she worked for hourly wage, and made approx 3K per month. She became "disabled" about the time we divorced and took disability for some time. She lost a court battle for her chemical sensitivity and they determined she was not disabled. (it is even in our divorce decree that I have no interest in any settlement she gets even tho the incident happened while we were married) While collecting disability, she tried to start a company and made a few bucks (of course she didn't tell the disability insurance folks that). That failed to make significant income and she took real estate appraiser training (while still collecting disability). All the while, I am paying support at a higher level than if she had been working for wages. I should have stated that in my opinion that she is voluntarily under employed, or hiding income to minimize her tax return, which has a consequence of increasing my support obligation.

Private school is a choice, it was a mutual choice because last year he was not allowed to go to "regular" public school.

While real estate market sucks, even foreclosure sales need appraisals. She also testifies as an expert in court cases.

If her EX boyfriend (fiance - oh yeah where she lived in a 2.5 mil house while I still payed the same) bought her car as a parting gift, can she then claim the auto expense of a free car to reduce her income? She can't have extraordinary expenses, she works from her home in a 10x10 office at best. Appraisers don't entertain clients that much!

My support gets calculated at my last year's income which is part salary and part commission/bonus. If I make say 75k of which only 50 is guaranteed. I still am obligated to pay for a year at that rate while I may not even make a bonus. I would have to wait 12 months to show that I made less. On the flip side, I could make more. If I decided to find alternate self employment, I would still be charged with keeping the support level the same even if my new work made 1/2 as much. Do those that get support have more leeway than those that pay? I have 50/50 custody, I already provide 50% and more of the child's support. It's not like I am trying to get out of doing my share, I want her to pick up more of her obligation and stop trying to subsidise her start up on my nickel. She has two businesses, if one makes a profit, and the other is a loser, why should I be punished for her interest in a losing operation? If she has been toiling for 5 years as self employed and making less than minimum wage, at what point can the court tell her to get a real full time job as she is not taking care of her part of the bargain. I know if the shoe was on the other foot it would have happened long ago.

My child tells me that their mother makes and sells jewelry and has told me of their shopping trips to the mart to buy supplies.

How does one pay nearly 2K in rent, let alone all the other living expenses with a 5K annual income (as shown on taxes)? How do I get a rental application to see what she put down in order to qualify for rent? Can the family law facilitator get her to fill out an income and expense for or do I have to go to court?

Whole the dating profile can surely be bogus, she also has other "professional" networking sites that talk about her being CEO blah blah blah. My point is that these references along with the lifestyle might have some impact on determination of imputed income. She is able to work, positions herself as experienced. She mentioned to me the value of time she volunteered at the school as "a mere $20/hr" I would assume she bills more than that.

I am just tired of being a provider of private welfare for someone capable of supporting themself.