?'s re: custody/divorce

[kpepperz]

What is the name of your state? FL

I have a few questions from my brother, who lives in FL, and is in the process of getting divorced from his wife. They have a 5 year old daughter. His stbx has a guy spending the night there (on a regular basis) who has been convicted of a class 3 felony for child abuse. My niece sleeps on the sofa bed because this guy sleeps in my nieces bed. They have not filed any paperwork with the court system, since they are barely getting by and cannot afford lawyers. All they have done is pulled something off the internet for a do-it-yourself divorce. She wrote it up and my brother signed it. It was notarized by her stepmom, and witnessed by her dad. The document was not reviewed by a lawyer. As of yet, there has been no court date, no legal orders entered at all. In the papers, they agreed my brother would have my niece 2 days during the week and every weekend. The stbx is on Xanax, prescribed by her family practitioner, and ups the dosage on her own when she feels she needs it. She currently takes 4 Xanax a day, along with Paxil. She is supposed to be seeing a psyc for the past 5 years, but has refused to do so.

I have told him that there is no way around this without consulting a lawyer, but I would ask a few questions to get a feel for the situation from you all.

1) Since there isn't a CO yet as far as custody, I realize that either one could have my niece. Could my brother bring my niece up here(to IL) to live and not be charged with kidnapping? He wants to find a job here and be closer to his family - he has none down there in FL.

2) If he moves here without my niece, is the mom obligated to send my niece for visitation, if my brother makes the arrangements? Remember, there is no court order yet.

3) WIll the fact that my former SIL is supposed to be seeing a psyc for the past 5 years (and hasn't) and self treats her "anxiety" with higher and higher doses of Xanax detrimental to her retaining custody of my niece?

4) Will calling CPS on my brothers wife help get this other guy out of the wifes house, and get my brother custody of my niece?

 

[CJane]

1) Since there isn't a CO yet as far as custody, I realize that either one could have my niece. Could my brother bring my niece up here(to IL) to live and not be charged with kidnapping? He wants to find a job here and be closer to his family - he has none down there in FL.

He 'could', yes. But the divorce/custody will be handled in FL and FL really doesn't like it when one parent wants to move the children out of state, from what I understand. So it's probably not a long-term solution.

2) If he moves here without my niece, is the mom obligated to send my niece for visitation, if my brother makes the arrangements? Remember, there is no court order yet.

Once there's an order that states that she has to send the child, yes. However, if dad moves he can expect to be 100% responsible for all travel fees... not just making the arrangements. Something to think about if he's 'barely getting by'.

3) WIll the fact that my former SIL is supposed to be seeing a psyc for the past 5 years (and hasn't) and self treats her "anxiety" with higher and higher doses of Xanax detrimental to her retaining custody of my niece?

It's hard to say. He's remained married to her for the past 5 years, the entire duration of the child's life and hasn't 'forced' her into treatment... so he's sort of given his approval to her lifestyle by default. I'd recommend a psych eval be requested, but without even the cash for an attorney, he obviously couldn't pay for that.

4) Will calling CPS on my brothers wife help get this other guy out of the wifes house, and get my brother custody of my niece?

It might. But he's going to have to convince CPS not only that this guy is a threat, but that he wasn't a threatwhen he first began staying there. If dad was REALLY concerned about his child's safety, he would have called CPS or the cops when he found out about the situation, not when he decided to try to use it in a custody battle.