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separation questions

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LAPF

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida.

My husband and I drew up our own separation agreement, and had it notarized. We did not file it with the courts. One clause in the agreement is that neither will bring a divorce action until our hefty pre-payment penalty expires in late 2008 (our first mortgage), unless other clauses in the agreement are violated. They have not. However, my name is the only name on our first mortgage. Now my husband has had his mail forwarded to a post office box. (We live on the same property in separate buildings). My concern is that if he has so much to hide that he needs a private mailbox, should he be able to have so much access to my credit? We are both in title on the house, and have a second mortgage in both of our names. In this situation, do I have a risk as far as him being able to run up perhaps credit cards secured by the house that I may end up responsible for, or can my credit be damaged in any way? The mailbox issue was not addressed in the agreement but I think this takes things to a whole new level. Would I because of this, be able to violate our agreement and go ahead and file for divorce? How valid is our agreement?

Also, how would our property(house) be divided? The first mortgage is in my name alone. The downpayment and closing costs came from our joint account that we put the money in from the sale of his home. We both work but I work off the books.
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
You need an attorney. Your separation agreement isn't worth the paper its printed on because it was not submitted to the courts for a judge's signature.
 

acmb05

Senior Member
LAPF said:
What is the name of your state? Florida.

My husband and I drew up our own separation agreement, and had it notarized. We did not file it with the courts. One clause in the agreement is that neither will bring a divorce action until our hefty pre-payment penalty expires in late 2008 (our first mortgage), unless other clauses in the agreement are violated. They have not. However, my name is the only name on our first mortgage. Now my husband has had his mail forwarded to a post office box. (We live on the same property in separate buildings). My concern is that if he has so much to hide that he needs a private mailbox, should he be able to have so much access to my credit? We are both in title on the house, and have a second mortgage in both of our names. In this situation, do I have a risk as far as him being able to run up perhaps credit cards secured by the house that I may end up responsible for, or can my credit be damaged in any way? The mailbox issue was not addressed in the agreement but I think this takes things to a whole new level. Would I because of this, be able to violate our agreement and go ahead and file for divorce? How valid is our agreement?

Also, how would our property(house) be divided? The first mortgage is in my name alone. The downpayment and closing costs came from our joint account that we put the money in from the sale of his home. We both work but I work off the books.


Don't matter, Florida is a community property state and everything will be split 50-50

Question though. How did WE put the money into an account from the sale of HIS first home. Don't you mean HE put the money in.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
acmb05 said:
[/B]

Don't matter, Florida is a community property state and everything will be split 50-50

Question though. How did WE put the money into an account from the sale of HIS first home. Don't you mean HE put the money in.

I am pretty certain that FL is an unequitable distribution state rather than a community property state.
 

acmb05

Senior Member
LAPF said:
What is the name of your state? Florida.

My husband and I drew up our own separation agreement, and had it notarized. We did not file it with the courts. One clause in the agreement is that neither will bring a divorce action until our hefty pre-payment penalty expires in late 2008 (our first mortgage), unless other clauses in the agreement are violated. They have not. However, my name is the only name on our first mortgage. Now my husband has had his mail forwarded to a post office box. (We live on the same property in separate buildings). My concern is that if he has so much to hide that he needs a private mailbox, should he be able to have so much access to my credit? We are both in title on the house, and have a second mortgage in both of our names. In this situation, do I have a risk as far as him being able to run up perhaps credit cards secured by the house that I may end up responsible for, or can my credit be damaged in any way? The mailbox issue was not addressed in the agreement but I think this takes things to a whole new level. Would I because of this, be able to violate our agreement and go ahead and file for divorce? How valid is our agreement?

Also, how would our property(house) be divided? The first mortgage is in my name alone. The downpayment and closing costs came from our joint account that we put the money in from the sale of his home. We both work but I work off the books.

Ummmm hate to tell you but, Legally you do not work then.

One question though. Why would you care what mail he gets if you are seperated and why should HIS mail be delivered to your address so that you can question him every time a piece of mail comes in that you are curious about?\

Yep you have a risk of that, but he also has a risk of the same thing.

Is it worth paying the hefty penalty for early payoff just because he now gets mail that you cant go thru?
 

LAPF

Junior Member
We are separated on the same property, and still have joint checking, and credit lines against the house. If he gets new credit lines against the house, then yes, I am concerned. My thought is- if he needs that much privacy- should I trust him with my name?. My name is the only one on the first (and major) mortgage.
We sold and put the money from the house he and his late second wife had been buying from his boss (until he was fired and had to sell it)- after we were married.
He already has not great credit- that's why I had to be the only name on our first mortgage. Mine is A-1- so our risk is not the same. And I know he did all he could to mess up his first wife's credit during their separation- he got possession of the house which was in both their names- and defaulted- lost the house while her name was still on it. He was in arrears on his child support when I met him- which all of our joint income tax returns have gone to. He has 5 children- I have none- but have always assumed the same financial responsibility as him and done alot more parenting. Most of the money from our joint credit line was spent on behalf of his kids- which I pay Half of.
Also, he's an alcoholic who hangs with unemployed crack addicted alcoholic people- and is their sugar Daddy- and he's been taking money from his son's bank account to support who knows how many of his friends drinking/ drugging/ smoking habits- and driving them around too because he's the only one who has a car.
 
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