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dequeendistress

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Alabama

OK I posted a vouluminous question earlier....really....and sorry to post another.

But IYO what does this mean...

....upon the discretion of the parties

Thanks
 


LdiJ

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Alabama

OK I posted a vouluminous question earlier....really....and sorry to post another.

But IYO what does this mean...

....upon the discretion of the parties

Thanks

That basically means that if both parties decide that they want to do something a certain way, that they can do that.
 

dequeendistress

Senior Member
exactly...but ex thinks it means whatever she wants...it is her sole decision.
Or, I should say, expects me to believe that...
What a laugh!

For a bigger laugh, she is an attorney and wrote the divorce decree....

HA HA HA

BTW I am on my current wifes account with this site, so if something doesn't make sense it is because she is not the one writing it.

So lets say I dont any longer agree to what was termed...upon the discretion of the parties, how do I get it changed? Is there a chance I can get it changed to something more final instead of hanging out there forever openended...plus since there was wording that says ...upon the discretion of the parties in the final decree...is it really a final decree?
 
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mistoffolees

Senior Member
exactly...but ex thinks it means whatever she wants...it is her sole decision.
Or, I should say, expects me to believe that...
What a laugh!

For a bigger laugh, she is an attorney and wrote the divorce decree....

HA HA HA

BTW I am on my current wifes account with this site, so if something doesn't make sense it is because she is not the one writing it.

So lets say I dont any longer agree to what was termed...upon the discretion of the parties, how do I get it changed? Is there a chance I can get it changed to something more final instead of hanging out there forever openended...plus since there was wording that says ...upon the discretion of the parties in the final decree...is it really a final decree?

First, get your own account to avoid confusion.

If the agreement says something can be done only on mutual agreement, and ex does it anyway, you file for her to be held in contempt.

You can proactively go back to court to ask for a clarification of those issues, but it might easily be more expensive and time consuming than it's worth.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
First, get your own account to avoid confusion.

If the agreement says something can be done only on mutual agreement, and ex does it anyway, you file for her to be held in contempt.

You can proactively go back to court to ask for a clarification of those issues, but it might easily be more expensive and time consuming than it's worth.

And..the only things that are "at the discretion of the parties" are those things specifically addressed as such...or if it says that changes can be made at the discretion of the parties, then the original terms stand unless both agree to change them.

So, if the decree says XXX, but you want it to be changed to YYY, you only get that if she agrees...otherwise it goes by the decree.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
And..the only things that are "at the discretion of the parties" are those things specifically addressed as such...or if it says that changes can be made at the discretion of the parties, then the original terms stand unless both agree to change them.

So, if the decree says XXX, but you want it to be changed to YYY, you only get that if she agrees...otherwise it goes by the decree.

But even if both parties agree to a change, I STRONGLY recommend filing the modification with the court to get court approval. It won't be that expensive, but it prevents one party from changing their mind later and making life miserable for everyone.
 

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