They won't tell him they're his brothers

[ziphash]

I have a daughter to my first ex. I have a son to my second ex. I adopted my wife's two boys and we have a son together.

My ex and her family acknowledge my daughter and my youngest son as my first son's sister and brother. However, they refuse to acknowledge my two adopted children as his brothers. They refer to them as "friends" when speaking of them to my son. When they say it in front of me, I correct them and they ignore me.

I think this is a terrible thing for them to do. I feel it will create problems later on between my children. Right now they're 7 (daughter), 5 (adopted son), 3 (adopted son), 3 (son), and 10 mos. (son). All of my children are equal, but the ex and her family are trying to make my adopted children as outsiders.

Is there anything that I can do about this?

 

[MySonsMom]

I have a daughter to my first ex. I have a son to my second ex. I adopted my wife's two boys and we have a son together.

My ex and her family acknowledge my daughter and my youngest son as my first son's sister and brother. However, they refuse to acknowledge my two adopted children as his brothers. They refer to them as "friends" when speaking of them to my son. When they say it in front of me, I correct them and they ignore me.

I think this is a terrible thing for them to do. I feel it will create problems later on between my children. Right now they're 7 (daughter), 5 (adopted son), 3 (adopted son), 3 (son), and 10 mos. (son). All of my children are equal, but the ex and her family are trying to make my adopted children as outsiders.

Is there anything that I can do about this?

I don't think so. I would just do my best to reinterate the fact that these ARE her siblings regardless of biology. Soon enough, she will learn and know. Just keep reminding her and explaining your family to her. When she is old enough to comprehend such things, she will know.

Good luck!

(ps...that's horrible of your X, but what would you expect from the troll?)

 

[ziphash]

Thanks for replying. It helps to know that people are behind me. It's actually my son, not my daughter, that's being told this. My ex MIL brought him up today. They didn't give us any problems about it. I guess she was afraid I'd take her back to CA so Judge Judy could let her have it again!

I imagine that the ex is only doing this because she's jealous that I'm so happy and have a wonderful family now and she's still miserable. I just worry about what else she'll try to get him to believe when he's older. All we can do is just keep reinforcing that we are all family and hope that when my son's old enough he'll see what's been going on.