UGH! I need to know what to do....

[Ukiah]

OK, here's the situation;

The X called and left a message stating the he wanted to know if I was going to go by the court ordered agreement and pick up daughter for Memorial Day weekend, or if I was going to renege on our unsigned written agreement, which we have incorporated with our court ordered agreement.

He has already gone against it, and I am now back to driving the 100 miles to drop daughter off at school (which I don't mind and she enjoys, but I don't want to have her suffer in school due to having to get up at an ungodly hour to travel (even though she sleeps, and we go out to breakfast, etc.).

He also called and wished me a happy mother's day (for the first time EVER). Though I was tempted to wish him a happy Mother's Day also, I refrained.

When he called today, he stated that he has something for me that he wanted to give to me for mother's day, and that's why he needed to know if I was going to pick daughter up.

(**NOTE**) He has NEVER given me anything for any occasion, ever!

I found out that he went to see the Facilitator and is furious that I was able to have the change of venue done. He is trying to sent the case back to the county where it came from...

I think he's going to try to serve me papers, and I want to avoid this until I get him served... unless, we exchange them on the same Day (now wouldn't that be a hoot!)

GOD WHAT A MESS!!

I've started the process of petitioning for custody. And yes I did find out what is needed (proceedure) to file... and I think I have it all;

OSC form 1285
and Form 1285.20
Current Custody Order
Response Declaration
The (17 page) parenting plan I drew up
And a declaration as to why I feel it would be in the best interest of my daughter to reside with me.
I'm going to drive down to the new county (120 miles away) and file this tomorrow.

OK, here's the Question;

Do I go by the original court order, or do I continue to go by the written agreement that we incorporated into it?

I want to show that I am more flexible than he - which won't be hard... BUT i don't want to show that I'm going back to the original due to his reneging as a retaliation.

But then I have only seen my daughter one weekend this month. I'm SOOOO confused!!


Help!

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Okay, kiddo. You've done good so far. Where's your "Income and Expense Declaration" ? I also noticed you didn't mention the "Proof of Service", so I gather you're having a friend or an Attorney Service serve the papers ?

You're a bad girl, Ukiah - - you didn't go to the law library.

Insofar as the Orders are concerned, you have to think to yourself - - "What does the judge already have in the court file ?" Because that's the one you have to go by. Remember, you can't make changes to a visitation order until a judge gives it his blessing.

So, now you've got your answer.

IAAL

 

[Ukiah]

My response:

You're a bad girl, Ukiah - - you didn't go to the law library.

Isn't income and expense declaration form # 1285.20? You know I have so many numbers in my head right now that I have a freakin' headache.

Yeah, I forgot to mention the proof of service, sorry.

I did go to the law library, I did!

This is what I found;
1285 OSC
1285.50 I & E
1285.85 Proof of service by mail (as this will be easiest)
1285.84 Personal service ( I may have a frend who is willing to do this for me)
1296.81 Response


After that, I heard that the X went to the facilitator's office and the new county clerk's don't give info out over the phone, so I can't find out if he's filed anything.....

Which is why I am filing tomorrow (killing two birds with one stone) - so I can get this started, and possibly find out if he has filed anything.

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Okay, you're a good girl. You did go to the library. It's just that you didn't list all the forms, so I was wondering. You see, it's not that big of a deal to look up the info, is it ? ("Oh, yeah. It's about as easy as Spleen surgery" )

The Income & Expense Declaration is 1285.50, and you have it in your above list !

Go get 'em !

IAAL

 

[Ukiah]

I wasn't planning on starting this this week. I figure if I don't start now, he may get the edge, and we'll be screwed! I can't stand what he's doing anymore. I'm mad and I'm not going to take this crap anymore!!

So early in the morning, I will be driving down to the new county to file this. Then Next week, I hope he does have soemthing for me, because I'll have something for him!! Matter of fact, maybe I'll drive to his house and give it to him that day! I'll have to see if my friend or Grandma will come with me.

I'm releived that I am doing this, the anticipation and anxiety were killing me!

Now, I must get back to "work" and define my declaration as to why I feel it is in the best interest of my daughter to live with us. Which is going to be hard because I have three pages, and so much more information to ADD!!

And I can't wait to hand him the papers and say;
Yeah, Happy Mother's Day to you to buddy!!

Though I probably won't - I'll definately be thinking it!!

Hey what's that?....... I'm breathing!

HA!

Ukiah