visitation rights?

[Jillian483]

What is the name of your state?Arizona
My husband currently has visitation with his children on all school breaks. We recently sent ex with the dates that he bought plane tickets for them to come out and visit. Their school break starts on a Thursday and We made the tickets for the following friday. Mother's lawyer has written us back stating that the court order states that "Father is allowed liberal visitation with children to include all school breaks". He says that this does not mean that Father is allowed to have the children for the ENTIRE BREAK. He has told us that we will have to pick a later date to allow the children to properly prepare the children for their trip. Mother has already stated that the children will only be sent with the clothes on their back and a magazine for the plane ride. Can the lawyer tell us this or are we entitled to the entire break?

 

[MominNJ]

re

Well, that's the thing with "liberal" visitation. It's NOT exact. Since this mother is so unreasonable, it wouldn't hurt to change the orders and make them more specific. Liberal visitation really only works with cooperative parties.

 

[Jillian483]

Ok

Since it does say liberal does it mean that my husband CAN have the entire break if he wants it? Or can they (ex and lawyer) just flat out say no? Asside from going back to court (not enough time and she is not technically in contempt) is there anything elso that cna be done? We have a vacation already planned and paid for with the children on the 8th of June and her lawyer is wanting us to chose a date for the childrens flight out here after the 10th. We thought that we were in our right to plan the children to fly out on the day that we requested and I would hate for the money that was spent on this vacation to go to waste

 

[Phnx02]

Since it does say liberal does it mean that my husband CAN have the entire break if he wants it? Or can they (ex and lawyer) just flat out say no? Asside from going back to court (not enough time and she is not technically in contempt) is there anything elso that cna be done? We have a vacation already planned and paid for with the children on the 8th of June and her lawyer is wanting us to chose a date for the childrens flight out here after the 10th. We thought that we were in our right to plan the children to fly out on the day that we requested and I would hate for the money that was spent on this vacation to go to waste

As your current order is written, you are not granted specific visitation dates and times Unfortunately, with this kind of wording, the ex is free to "call the shots" as she seems fit. Hardly fair. Your husband can have the entire break if he wants it, but the ex wife has to agree. If she doesn't, you don't get it. Short of going back to court to get this changed, you can only try to get the ex to agree to the dates you want. How can her attorney say there's not enough time to plan for a visit that isn't even going to take place for another 3 months? This is silly. If she won't budge 2 days on the dates, you may have to bump your vacation plans to accomodate for this. Not cancel altoghther, just change the dates. Most airlines will allow you to change a departure or return date for a $100 fee per ticket. Good luck! How happy & lucky my kids would be to get a fun vacation with their dad!

 

[Jillian483]

As your current order is written, you are not granted specific visitation dates and times Unfortunately, with this kind of wording, the ex is free to "call the shots" as she seems fit. Hardly fair. Your husband can have the entire break if he wants it, but the ex wife has to agree. If she doesn't, you don't get it. Short of going back to court to get this changed, you can only try to get the ex to agree to the dates you want. How can her attorney say there's not enough time to plan for a visit that isn't even going to take place for another 3 months? This is silly. If she won't budge 2 days on the dates, you may have to bump your vacation plans to accomodate for this. Not cancel altoghther, just change the dates. Most airlines will allow you to change a departure or return date for a $100 fee per ticket. Good luck! How happy & lucky my kids would be to get a fun vacation with their dad!

Yeah that is what I was thinking. It sucks though. Me and my husband will have been married 3 years this year and this is the first time that we will be able to afford a vacation with the children. We have been putting 20 dollars aside in a "piggy bank" every week for a year now just to afford this vacation and there is no way to move it because my husband starts his summer classes a day after we get back.

 

[casa]

Yeah that is what I was thinking. It sucks though. Me and my husband will have been married 3 years this year and this is the first time that we will be able to afford a vacation with the children. We have been putting 20 dollars aside in a "piggy bank" every week for a year now just to afford this vacation and there is no way to move it because my husband starts his summer classes a day after we get back.

You've been told several times that your husband needs to modify visitation to reflect more specific terminology(not as costly as one would think)... If he doesn't choose to DO that- then you have plenty of opportunities to plan vacations during your parenting times (given your past posting of your parenting plan and the various tourist destinations in AZ).

 

[Jillian483]

You've been told several times that your husband needs to modify visitation to reflect more specific terminology(not as costly as one would think)... If he doesn't choose to DO that- then you have plenty of opportunities to plan vacations during your parenting times (given your past posting of your parenting plan and the various tourist destinations in AZ).

Yeah we are in the process of fighting for full custody. I have posted some questions here to get someinsight as to what other people have done in their own cases to see how it worked for them. By the way the children live in Arizona, we live in Illinois. We are taking them to wisconsin.

 

[casa]

Yeah we are in the process of fighting for full custody. I have posted some questions here to get someinsight as to what other people have done in their own cases to see how it worked for them. By the way the children live in Arizona, we live in Illinois. We are taking them to wisconsin.

Right...so AZ has jurisdiction- so you need to check your parenting plan or the state's 'default' regulations re; that.

 

[StpmomNchicago]

Liberal

You know most courts assign liberal visitation to parents if they feel that they can work together. Why can't you just call her and explain your situation and tell her that it is not possible to move your vacation because your husband is in school right when you get back. I read in one of your other posts that she gets the children back one week early for school so you are not taking the whole break. I am pretty sure that with her having sole custody she is the deciding factor as to how much of the break you can actually have.

 

[poiduke]

communicate plans

my first question would be:did your husband contact mom with the intended
dates for this visit? if so and she agreed why is there an issue now? if not then why didn't he communicate his plans and dates? this is were i see the issue began.
i myself had a very similar parenting plan.we (ex and i ) needed to frequent our communication so we each knew what was going on. school breaks,vacations,extended family events etc. we too lived in separte states so this takes quite a bit of work.and wait till the children are older and start taking jobs or joining social,atheltic clubs,etc. calendars fill up quickly.
and previously stated if he wants a better plan modify or communicate better.
best of luck

 

[Jillian483]

Answers

my first question would be:did your husband contact mom with the intended
dates for this visit?:
Yes he sent her a letter in January that she received around the 13th. He had asked her what dates he would be able to have for the childrens school break and she said that he would have to send her the dates that he wants and wait for her to respond. We sent her the dates and her lawyer sent us an email saying that we were taking up too much of the break and that mom needs time with the children too. Hubbie requested the 3rd of june throught the 6th of july. The children are on break from the 2nd of june till the 19th of july. We feel that we are giving her plenty of time given the fact that she has denied my husbands visitation for the past year. Now neither her nor her lawyer will return our calls or emails. they have told us to pick a date the week after their break starts but ave yet to tell us when they have to be returned. We've also explained the vacation thing to tem and they don't care. The children also have a half sisiter that they will only be able to see for a limites amount of time due to different schedules. We can only take the vacation between the 6th and the 15th of June.

 

[stealth2]

The fact remains that there is no set schedule. Therefore Mom is not in contempt. As has been said before, Dad needs to file for a modification so that the visitation dates are more clearly defined.

And it is never a good idea to buy airline tickets before a schedule is confirmed. Having said that, he could take it back to court and request that the judge order her to make the kids available for those dates due to Dad's constraints. It may or may not happen. My ex did it, and he got the dates he wanted. Of course, he also had to pay my legal fees as he'd made arrangements contrary to a previously agreed schedule.

 

[Jillian483]

The fact remains that there is no set schedule. Therefore Mom is not in contempt. As has been said before, Dad needs to file for a modification so that the visitation dates are more clearly defined.

And it is never a good idea to buy airline tickets before a schedule is confirmed. Having said that, he could take it back to court and request that the judge order her to make the kids available for those dates due to Dad's constraints. It may or may not happen. My ex did it, and he got the dates he wanted. Of course, he also had to pay my legal fees as he'd made arrangements contrary to a previously agreed schedule.

Yeah we thought so. He is actually going back to fight for full custody. There are a lot of other thing that she is doing wrong that I have not posted because we already know the answers that will hopefully assist him is getting custody. Is it not tru though that is she is now refusing to give him iny dates at all that she is now in contempt or does she have the option to say no to the summer break because the order says LIBERAL and she had full custody?

 

[stealth2]

She's not in contempt for a different reason. Liberal and reasonable visitation - what does that mean? What is liberal and reasonable to Dad may not be to Mom. So the most a judge is likely to do is tell her to quit playing games, and then set a specific schedule.