What is needed to change from sole custody to joint?

[mommabearx1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia

My XH asked me yesterday if we could switch from me having sole custody to joint custody. I didn't really answer him as this was happening during the pickup of our child, but if the court order was put into place in Feb. doesn't he need to have a circumstantial (sp) change in order for the order to change. He has started showing up at Dr. appts and her sport games and calling her about every other day, which I am very happy about because she just glows when he shows up unexpected.

My thought process is I have had Temp. sole cusotdy since 8/06 and he had supervised visits where he had to pay to have a moitor with him (I had suggested it be his mother so he could have longer visits but the court tol himhe had to do it at a counsling center for an hour EO week) until Feb of this year.

He asked me before if I would change and i asked him was it because he wanted more time, because I had already asked him if he would pick up our child from daycare once in a while ( basically like a midweek visitation) just to let me know when because the babysitter doesn't know who he is and obviously I would need to let her know. Well he never has taken me up on that. He said he would like to have joint custody because the CS is now calculated as me having sole, I don't know where he read that off of because I don't see anywhere in our CS order where it is, but that could be the case. But I also don't see how it would change since he isn't asking for anymore time just a change in the custody.
Any advice is great thanks!!

 

[Ohiogal]

You two can agree to the change OR IF there is a substantial change in circumstance for the child, he can have the court order it.

 

[mommabearx1]

You two can agree to the change OR IF there is a substantial change in circumstance for the child, he can have the court order it.

I don't agree to it, I don't aside from him paying less CS think a switch would be necessary. And as far as the support goes it will be lessened next Sept when she begins school.
What would be a substantial change? MY daughter and I haven't moved, are planning to but it will be in the same school district we are in ( and by district I mean it is the same school she would be attending it's just a few neighborhoods away) But he was living in another county and has moved to a differnt county (not ours) about 40 minutes away. But I don't see how that would hap him at all? Thanks again

 

[LdiJ]

I don't agree to it, I don't aside from him paying less CS think a switch would be necessary. And as far as the support goes it will be lessened next Sept when she begins school.
What would be a substantial change? MY daughter and I haven't moved, are planning to but it will be in the same school district we are in ( and by district I mean it is the same school she would be attending it's just a few neighborhoods away) But he was living in another county and has moved to a differnt county (not ours) about 40 minutes away. But I don't see how that would hap him at all? Thanks again

I don't see any change in circumstance in your situation at all, let alone a substantial change.

Also, he has admitted that his primary motive is to reduce child support, rather than wanting to spend more time with the child.

He hasn't been off supervised visitation all that long, I think you probably need to give it significantly more time before you consider joint custody.

 

[PEONY418]

I don't understand when all the advice for custody changes states there has to be a change of circumstance for the court to hear it. I have been to custody hearings many times just on the gounds of my ex wanting to gain full custody. If the advice you give were true I wouldnt be heading to a full trial custody hearing at the end of this month, which is just on those grounds, no other significant changes.

 

[Ohiogal]

I don't understand when all the advice for custody changes states there has to be a change of circumstance for the court to hear it. I have been to custody hearings many times just on the gounds of my ex wanting to gain full custody. If the advice you give were true I wouldnt be heading to a full trial custody hearing at the end of this month, which is just on those grounds, no other significant changes.

Custody changes are ONLY GRANTED if a substantial change of circumstance is proven AND it is in the best interest of the child. You can continue to be taken to court over a change in the way the wind blows. How many times has custody changed on you? The advice that we give IS TRUE. We didn't say she cannot be sued.

 

[PEONY418]

Our custody schedule has changed....gone from eow and wed nights to one week Mom, one week Dad. That is the schedule we are currently on. Now he wants full, so off to a full trial.

 

[Ohiogal]

Our custody schedule has changed....gone from eow and wed nights to one week Mom, one week Dad. That is the schedule we are currently on. Now he wants full, so off to a full trial.

So you changed from you having sole custody to him having joint or you started with joint custody AND the time share changed? NOt to mention you are hijacking and this should be on your own thread. There is a difference between timeshare changing and custody changing.

 

[Silverplum]

THIS thread is about Virginia.

YOUR life is in Pennsylvania.

Right there, you have two entirely different systems of family law, different laws, etc.

That's part of what you do not understand.

I don't understand when all the advice for custody changes states there has to be a change of circumstance for the court to hear it. I have been to custody hearings many times just on the gounds of my ex wanting to gain full custody. If the advice you give were true I wouldnt be heading to a full trial custody hearing at the end of this month, which is just on those grounds, no other significant changes.

 

[PEONY418]

I understand the State difference and thats why I asked further on in my thread. But it seems to me the answer is always the same.