I know...I'm asking for it but

[wileybunch]

Without quoting your long post, oh, hell no. I'm all for different parenting styles, but that is too much and I would have been back in court already if my kids were being tortured in a sadistic manner, at least according to what they say (and you said Dad said the 6-hour hot sauce in the mouth happened -- how do they keep it in their mouth for 6 hours?!). I personally would also risk contempt if I felt the risk were great enough for the things being done to the kids, I wouldn't wait for a court to rule if there's a great danger or risk of sending them pending a motion being heard, but that is something that's very difficult to judge from afar, I'm not suggesting you do that. I honestly don't know why you haven't made a motion sooner given these things. It sounds really out of control.

 

[swtwilma]

To clarify the hot sauce...the sauce was placed in the mouth. According to dad he swallowed it after a few minutes but was not allowed water or food for the rest of the day to wash it down (6 hrs). And to be honest the hot sauce thing, even though it boils my blood, is not my biggest worry right now. I think after CPS showed up, even though they did nothing, it did make them worry. I actually got copies of the CPS reports and showed them to dad. One of their friends filed the complaint. My biggest worry is the emotional stuff that happens. It is really wearing on them and destroying their relationship with their dad.

I did modify after the hot sauce thing happened to change from the then time of 50/50 limiting the times they would be at home without dad. I made the error of agreeing to settle prior to the hearing. (I used to be afraid of the court room but now know it is my friend). I just don't want to make the same mistakes twice. I want to have all my i's dotted and t's crossed. It is hard to say well this happened a month ago cause my kids said so. I just need to wait and hear from the counciler so I know how quick to move.

I have found many court cases that absolutly back me, so that is good.

 

[wileybunch]

Ah, OK. Frankly, the hot sauce thing is no biggie then unless you're talking some volcano style hot sauce. Most hot sauce isn't that big of a deal and would have no lasting effects, other liquids in the mouth or not.

 

[Isis1]

Ah, OK. Frankly, the hot sauce thing is no biggie then unless you're talking some volcano style hot sauce. Most hot sauce isn't that big of a deal and would have no lasting effects, other liquids in the mouth or not.

actually, you just brought attention to something.

say a child gets dared by an adult for a amount of money to hold something "hot" in their mouth, eat it, without water for a few seconds (like 30). child has the choice to say no. this is not considered child abuse right?

grr, this is a hijack isn't it?

 

[maryjo]

I know a woman, many years ago, who used this hot sauce thing on some toddlers in a daycare when they bit someone.

This was most definately considered abuse and that was in the 80's. I realize the differences of the situation here but it was still hot sauce in the mouths and she lost her job over it.

 

[wileybunch]

I know a woman, many years ago, who used this hot sauce thing on some toddlers in a daycare when they bit someone.

This was most definately considered abuse and that was in the 80's. I realize the differences of the situation here but it was still hot sauce in the mouths and she lost her job over it.

The situations are different. The daycare owner/manager terminated the worker's employment. The law did not make a finding of abuse.

 

[AkersTile]

Dad and/or StepMom does not want to find out the hard way that one of the kiddos is allergic to hot sauce. Not all ht sauces are the same and there could be an ingredient in one that causes a reaction. My Mom and StepDad found that out the hard way with me. Try explaining to the ER why your child is turning blue. Not gonna go over well with CPS.

OP~ Good Luck. It sounds like Dad's lawyer will work with you. As long as you have your proof to back it up, a judge should at least listen to you. No way to tell how he'll rule, that's at his discretion, but it looks to be in your favor.

 

[mommyof4]

"Saucing" isn't my personal choice of discipline, but it's pretty common. Of course, if you have a kid that likes hot sauce, it's really pretty worthless.

I haven't ever heard of anyone convicted of abuse for saucing his or her kid.

That said, SM saucing the kids against yours and Dad's wishes is way out of line. Add it to everything else, and I agree that you need to get this back into court. This isn't going to get any better without a judge putting her back in her place.

And yes, I had the same issue with my ex and CPS. When the investigator told me they were closing the case due to my ex's refusal to meet with them per his atty's advice, I wound up calling my state representative who personally called the local CPS director. (It helped that at the time, my county CPS was involved in several lawsuits due to the death of children while in CPS custody.) CPS wound up writing a protection plan pending a court hearing in spite of the fact that ex still wouldn't meet with them.

 

[maryjo]

The situations are different. The daycare owner/manager terminated the worker's employment. The law did not make a finding of abuse.

Which would be why I said the situations are different. However, I dont know if any charges were brought against her or not. I was very young at that time.