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11 years later I find out I have a daughter...now what?

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RSMBob

Junior Member
Reyna, I appreciate the advice and the apology...obviously it is an emotional issue. And to others out there, I appreciate your advice and comforting words...I really do want to do what is right...for me, for my family and for the girl.

You know, when I talked to my ex-gf about things in our brief conversations...right now an extended one is still very painful emotionally but I know I will get to it and through it because I need to develop some kind of relationship with her for the girl's sake...the 3 things I asked her were: Is the girl happy and healthy; does she have a good life; and are you a good mom to her.

Her responses were: Yes, other than a few medical issues that have been handled; yes (although with the impending divorce I can only imagine); and yes, she said she's a good mom and that it's the most important thing in the world to her, but has made some mistakes (ed note: um...ya think?). And if the true answers to those 3 questions are generally yes, I don't want to cause havoc in the girl's life, just be there as a part of it and show my love and support for her. However, given the blatant deception of the past by the ex-gf, her impending divorce and its possible effects, and anything's potential effect on my life and my family, I think I do need to put questions in writing and get some responses in writing as well. Whether that involves lawyers...I don't know...I'd like to avoid it for everyone's sake.

I'll keep watch for any further inputs anyone has...and again, I appreciate the responses so far. I'll also try to update here as well...hopefully with good news.
 
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casa

Senior Member
RSMBob said:
Reyna, I appreciate the advice and the apology...obviously it is an emotional issue. And to others out there, I appreciate your advice and comforting words...I really do want to do what is right...for me, for my family and for the girl.

You know, when I talked to my ex-gf about things in our brief conversations...right now an extended one is still very painful emotionally but I know I will get to it and through it...I need to develop some kind of relationship with her for the girl's sake...the 3 things I asked her were: Is the girl happy and healthy; does she have a good life; and are you a good mom to her.

Her responses were: Yes, other than a few medical issues that have been handled; yes (although with the impending divorce I can only imagine); and yes, she said she's a good mom and that it's the most important thing in the world to her, but has made some mistakes (ed note: um...ya think?). And if the true answers to those 3 questions are genreally yes, I don't want to cause havoc in the girl's life, just be there as a part of it and show my love and support for her. However, given the blatant deception of the past by the ex-gf, her impending divorce and its possible effects, and anything's potential effect on my life and my family, I think I do need to put questions in writing and get some responses in writing as well. Whether that involves lawyers...I don't know...I'd like to avoid it for everyone's sake.

I'll keep watch for any further inputs anyone has...and again, I appreciate the responses so far. I'll also try to update here as well...hopefully with good news.

I highly encourage as much communication in writing as is possible.

Good luck to you in this.
 
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