2 new questions preparing for evaluations

[SITLYNNE]

What is the name of your state? Pa

The first question is dad is trying to obtain paperwork from childs school that was filled out by mom since the childs been enrolled in school-2000. He is requesting copies of the states enrollment for reduced/free lunch program. Dad has recently found out moms income (domestic relations hearing and court ordered evaluation disclosure) and has realized that she has not been truthful when filling out forms for child to receive reduced lunch through the states program. Mom has always filled out this form using her address and income for the child because she said she met the income guidelines (custody is currently joint physical and legal). When the paperwork was sent home this school year, mom refused to fill it out claiming she makes too much money now. Her income has decreased by $10,000 this year due to quitting her part time job she held for the last 2 years. When dad questioned her about this she told him to fill it out and he said he didn't qualify. His attorney has suggested he retain copies from the school to use during the current evaluations/custody trial. The school is not cooperating and this morning told dad that they would need to get special permission from the business director of the school and then they will get back to dad with the answer. Does the FERPA law apply here?
The second question is relating to the HIPAA law. Mom has a child to a previous relationship. Child turned 18 yesterday and is a senior this year. She has been in quite a bit of trouble and dads concern is the manner which mom rears both children-their son and moms first child. Dad doesn't want their son to end up in trouble as his big sister is doing. He knows the issues with the daughter are not his business, however, because of the evaluation in process dad thinks the issues will be revelant to show how the mother is raising her daughter and feels this may help his outcome. The newest issue is the daughter has been suspended from school for the next 10 days for threatening to kill someone. When dad expressed his concern with mom about this current issue ( because their son is upset and talked with dad about it), she claimed that all her daughters school records are protected by the HIPAA laws and dad claims the child is no longer a minor. Am I correct in thinking that HIPAA laws only protect the childs medical records and now the child is 18, as dad says. Please help settle this debate between mom and dad.

 

[CJane]

I don't doubt that without a subpeona, the school does need special permission to release the info that your husband is requesting. He's not simply requesting access to the child's school records, he's requesting access to financial information of his ex's that was given to the school in an attempt to receive state aid - not the same thing.

HIPAA only protects medical records, not school records. BUT I seriously doubt anything dad found out about the daughter would have an effect on the current case.

 

[SITLYNNE]

I don't doubt that without a subpeona, the school does need special permission to release the info that your husband is requesting. He's not simply requesting access to the child's school records, he's requesting access to financial information of his ex's that was given to the school in an attempt to receive state aid - not the same thing.

HIPAA only protects medical records, not school records. BUT I seriously doubt anything dad found out about the daughter would have an effect on the current case.

I didn't think about the financial side of this. Thanks.

So, how the mothers other child is being raised should not be an issue or concern of the current evaluation, but another member here thinks that my custody case should be a concern?

 

[bononos]

That other child will be requested to come in as well for an evaluation session if necessary, and most likely it will.
My 7 yr. old (half-brother to son in custody issue) HAD to attend the play meeting and the evaluator asked him a few questions.

 

[CJane]

I didn't think about the financial side of this. Thanks.

So, how the mothers other child is being raised should not be an issue or concern of the current evaluation, but another member here thinks that my custody case should be a concern?

I can only tell you what the GAL for my case has told me so far...

They want all the people 'of the household' available to interview - and preferably at the home visit. So, my BF's kids aren't really relevant to the case because they don't live with us and don't visit often (in fact, in the almost 6 months I've lived with him, the kids have never met each other). She did ask what the custody arrangements were between him and his ex-wives, I told her, and she made a note. End of story.

The poster who seems to think that your former custody battle (of which I know NONE of the details) also thinks that I'm trying to essentially steal my children from their father after 'losing' custody of them. Nevermind that I AGREED OUT OF COURT to the current order, or that I already have the kids 60% of the time, or that I'm not attempting to modify any of the physical time with the kids. The same poster also thinks that by living 35 minutes from the children's school I am somehow endangering them or placing them in a hardship situation. So, I'm not really equipped to comment on her beliefs re: your case.

 

[bononos]

They want all the people 'of the household' available to interview - and preferably at the home visit.

True, I keep forgetting you have the home visits. They'll want the other kid there for her home visit.

 

[SITLYNNE]

I can only tell you what the GAL for my case has told me so far...

They want all the people 'of the household' available to interview - and preferably at the home visit. So, my BF's kids aren't really relevant to the case because they don't live with us and don't visit often (in fact, in the almost 6 months I've lived with him, the kids have never met each other). She did ask what the custody arrangements were between him and his ex-wives, I told her, and she made a note. End of story.

Their court order states this daughters name along with mine as persons to be interviewed during evaluations. My boyfriend also has another daughter from a prior relationship who lives with her mother and visits with dad when she wants-their arrangements w/o a court order. It works well for all. That child is now 14 and she will not be interviewed. Neither will my children. My question is still, should dad "bring up" things this child has done as his concerns so the evaluator could question her- remember she is now 18 and lives in the house.

The poster who seems to think that your former custody battle (of which I know NONE of the details) also thinks that I'm trying to essentially steal my children from their father after 'losing' custody of them. Nevermind that I AGREED OUT OF COURT to the current order, or that I already have the kids 60% of the time, or that I'm not attempting to modify any of the physical time with the kids. The same poster also thinks that by living 35 minutes from the children's school I am somehow endangering them or placing them in a hardship situation. So, I'm not really equipped to comment on her beliefs re: your case.

Diddo. When you have an entire free day, read all my past posts and you might get some of an understanding of my personal custody battle. Brief-PAS for 5 years, sued 3 times for "full custody"-dad swore he would one day run me out of money-he won-I'm broke. I did not "lose" custody as some think, I signed primary physical custody to dad when I became broke and couldn't keep fighting, also for the emotional stress it put on my sons. I couldn't see them continuing in this battle as they were, I was looking out for their best interest/stability. I sure wish I had known about this site back then. Things would have not happened the way they did. I definately would have fought harder, but the boys were suffering terribly. Now we all suffer.
Edited to add: I also agreed "out of court" to our current order. It was all done by the fax to each attorneys office and our place of employment with ex standing in my office the entire time demanding me to agree and sign the order the way his attorney worded it, or face court in the morning with no attorney ( I couldn't afford his demand of another $1500 by the trial date). I gave, he punched out on his time card and immediately drove to domestics to file for support and have his order terminated. As I always knew, it was done for the almighty $$$$$. But my oldest says dad told him to tell me he would only collect from me until I had paid him back all that I had collected from him!!!! That day has long passed, I'm still paying.

 

[casa]

What is the name of your state? Pa

The first question is dad is trying to obtain paperwork from childs school that was filled out by mom since the childs been enrolled in school-2000. He is requesting copies of the states enrollment for reduced/free lunch program. Dad has recently found out moms income (domestic relations hearing and court ordered evaluation disclosure) and has realized that she has not been truthful when filling out forms for child to receive reduced lunch through the states program. Mom has always filled out this form using her address and income for the child because she said she met the income guidelines (custody is currently joint physical and legal). When the paperwork was sent home this school year, mom refused to fill it out claiming she makes too much money now. Her income has decreased by $10,000 this year due to quitting her part time job she held for the last 2 years. When dad questioned her about this she told him to fill it out and he said he didn't qualify. His attorney has suggested he retain copies from the school to use during the current evaluations/custody trial. The school is not cooperating and this morning told dad that they would need to get special permission from the business director of the school and then they will get back to dad with the answer. Does the FERPA law apply here?
The second question is relating to the HIPAA law. Mom has a child to a previous relationship. Child turned 18 yesterday and is a senior this year. She has been in quite a bit of trouble and dads concern is the manner which mom rears both children-their son and moms first child. Dad doesn't want their son to end up in trouble as his big sister is doing. He knows the issues with the daughter are not his business, however, because of the evaluation in process dad thinks the issues will be revelant to show how the mother is raising her daughter and feels this may help his outcome. The newest issue is the daughter has been suspended from school for the next 10 days for threatening to kill someone. When dad expressed his concern with mom about this current issue ( because their son is upset and talked with dad about it), she claimed that all her daughters school records are protected by the HIPAA laws and dad claims the child is no longer a minor. Am I correct in thinking that HIPAA laws only protect the childs medical records and now the child is 18, as dad says. Please help settle this debate between mom and dad.

Your H can't access the daughter's school or medical records bc he isn't one of her parents.

He can, however, access his son's school and medical records- whether he is the Custodial Parent or not.

A teen in trouble may or may not help your H's case...after all, teens are historically tumultuous times. And there are many factors (which we don't know) re; why the daughter is having issues. ie; where is her father in all of this? etc.

 

[SITLYNNE]

Your H can't access the daughter's school or medical records bc he isn't one of her parents.

He wasn't asking to access her records, the mom says he can't mention this suspension or any of the daughters problems to the evaluator because of the HIPAA laws. Dad mentioned to mom that only covers medical issues and the child is now not a minor.

He can, however, access his son's school and medical records- whether he is the Custodial Parent or not.

So you're saying the school should give him copies of the state forms mom filled out?

A teen in trouble may or may not help your H's case...after all, teens are historically tumultuous times. And there are many factors (which we don't know) re; why the daughter is having issues. ie; where is her father in all of this? etc.

IMO the daughters issues stem from not having her father around and her mother not doing the best job as a single mom ( please don't take this the wrong way-I'm not bashing her-just stating my opinion) and her father has never been around, he didn't even acknowledge her at birth-the mom was young (15), dad was much older (I think 21). I only know what my boyfriend has told me about the daughter, he came into her life when she was about 5. Until that time, she was being raised by her grandma because of the moms age and school. When the mom started a serious relationship with my boyfriend, they got an apartment and the daughter came to live with them. The dad during this time did not pay support. It is unknown if he does now, mom has tried to gain support in the past according to my boyfriend but has had no results. My boyfriend was like the girls father for about 6 years while he and the mother were together, and even when the broke up, he gained temporary custody of her while the mother attended rehab and was institutionalized for mental issues. The daughter and my boyfriend are still a little close considering the circumstances, he even called to wish her a happy birthday last night and stated to me that if she ever needed anything or ever made good on her threats to run away, leave her mom when she is 18, etc. she was always welcome. He has not expressed this to the girl. I'm not sure mom knows they are on good terms. The daughter has never met or seen her father but her 1/2 brother has told us he remembers her receiving cards in the mail from him.

 

[bononos]

My boyfriend was like the girls father for about 6 years while he and the mother were together, and even when the broke up, he gained temporary custody of her while the mother attended rehab and was institutionalized for mental issues.

WOW, does he have the papers from this?

 

[SITLYNNE]

WOW, does he have the papers from this?

Yes, he has the actual court order stating the girls age/dob and the reasons she would temporarily reside with him, in the "family" home, until the mom was out of the hospital and was done all of her court ordered rehabilitiation.

 

[stealth2]

And he never knew Mom was loopy before they had the son?

 

[SITLYNNE]

And he never knew Mom was loopy before they had the son?

Same question I have asked him a million times, last night being the latest time. His answer is the same as so many others in his shoes, "I thought she had changed or I thought I could change her, I loved her, I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her", etc. And he was not that young, 25 to be exact, and already had a 3 y/o daughter. I know, crazy. He wanted a future, she didn't want to be tied down, this was after the son was born. Dad actually thought when she got pregnant that she would not want to continue with the pregnancy, but she did. It was 2 years later that she decided she didn't want to be "involved " anymore or tied down, she wanted to date other people, so (in dads words) he told her she could keep the house and the car and he wanted the boy and the dog, she agreed for the time being. She later tried to keep the child from him and that is when the mental and rehab issues came up and dad filed for custody. They ended with a permanent order 1/2 years later where they share legal and physical custody.

 

[casa]

IMO the daughters issues stem from not having her father around and her mother not doing the best job as a single mom ( please don't take this the wrong way-I'm not bashing her-just stating my opinion) and her father has never been around, he didn't even acknowledge her at birth-the mom was young (15), dad was much older (I think 21). I only know what my boyfriend has told me about the daughter, he came into her life when she was about 5. Until that time, she was being raised by her grandma because of the moms age and school. When the mom started a serious relationship with my boyfriend, they got an apartment and the daughter came to live with them. The dad during this time did not pay support. It is unknown if he does now, mom has tried to gain support in the past according to my boyfriend but has had no results. My boyfriend was like the girls father for about 6 years while he and the mother were together, and even when the broke up, he gained temporary custody of her while the mother attended rehab and was institutionalized for mental issues. The daughter and my boyfriend are still a little close considering the circumstances, he even called to wish her a happy birthday last night and stated to me that if she ever needed anything or ever made good on her threats to run away, leave her mom when she is 18, etc. she was always welcome. He has not expressed this to the girl. I'm not sure mom knows they are on good terms. The daughter has never met or seen her father but her 1/2 brother has told us he remembers her receiving cards in the mail from him.

And now the girl has lost another father ...and is looking at being split up from her sibling(s). Not to mention that if she never got help following her mother's rehab/drug addiction, it seems as though your H had a part in the girls' issues...if only because he was there when all the mess started.

 

[SITLYNNE]

And now the girl has lost another father ...and is looking at being split up from her sibling(s). Not to mention that if she never got help following her mother's rehab/drug addiction, it seems as though your H had a part in the girls' issues...if only because he was there when all the mess started.

Casa, the original split happened in 1997. She is now 18 and already planning her life on her own, maybe even before graduating. Dad tried, but was not her bio father, so he lost that custody battle. I do not think she ever had any counseling, but would think it could've helped her, but how is that my boyfriends fault? He is considered a legal stranger to her. Yes, he was there when all this started and would have loved for things to go differently for her and cares very much for her. His only legal obligation is to the son. Considering she tells her brother such things as she hates him and wishes he would die, I don't really think she'll be too harmed if dad gains custody. The dad on many occassions has called to speak with the mother about the way the son is treated by his sister, she is often very verbal and physical with him, I have witnessed this first hand. When the mother blows it off, the dad will call the girl herself, she is old enough to know what she is doing, and the incidents seem to stop for a while. Besides, at the rate this is going, she'll probably be married with children of her own by then. I'm certain if I would be posting questions about how dad wants to obtain custody of this girl I would be getting bombarded with responses like, she has a mother, she has a father, he is not bio dad-they never married, he is a legal stranger, why does he want to take the girl from her mother, and so on. Instead, you're bashing him for not being "her father and taking away her brother" when they seperated 8 years ago. Yes, dad has concerns for the girl, but can do nothing about it. He can only change things with their son.