What is the name of your state? Indiana This is long but I need opinions? I went into a meeting Wednesday with the mother of my child over the motion for comtempt I had filed in court and her return motions. The attorneys thought that we could work things out.
I will give a summary of some of the things that she came at me with and when I did get a word in edgewise what I was asking for. Also too what the attorneys said about the request in general. I found it real interesting that during the meeting for the most part not only was my attorney on my side but hers too.
These were her requests
1. She did not want me taking our daughter to church, said I was forcing her. I told her point blank that was not true that the only time our daughter had balked was the first time we went. Now she asks to make sure are going.
a. Her attorney told her she could not control whether I took our child to church or not!
2. She said my better half was constantly calling our daughter a bxxxh.
b. My attorney asked what proof she had of this. Well our daughter told me this so I know it is true. I then asked her if she believed everything that our daughter tells her. She said well yes why wouldn’t I. I said you must be awful gullible, because I know she lies, you even told her to lie to me so you know she is capable of it.
I then repeated the statement that was made to me by our daughter about her step dad and my ex’s husband. The fact that he could not have his son unless supervised because he had made an attempt on his wife’s life and had killed the family pets. She then said that’s not true and I replied but our own daughter told it, so it has to be true.
3. She wants to change the pick up time on Sunday from 7pm to 5pm. Her reason because she gets off work at 7.
a. All I kept thinking was how does that make since and both attorneys said the same thing? So they told her 7:30pm give or take a half hour.
4. She said I call her house harassing her if our daughter says they are going out of state. She said its
none of his business what we do on our time.
b. Her attorney told her that she has to notify me and give me an emergency number where my daughter can be reached in case of an emergency.
So she threw her arms in the air and said consider yourself notified. We are going away this weekend out of state, just for your information.
Her attorney asked for a number where she could be reached. She said I have no idea where we will be, so no I don’t.
He said do you have a cell phone and she said no. He said maybe you should consider getting one. She said no way.
He then told her that if she continued to not notify me or give me a number that she would be considered to be in contempt. (This from her attorney, it was strange, he said more to her than my attorney. But I think she lied to him and told him that I was causing all of the trouble and never gave him the actual facts.)
5. She told me during my summer visitation that she wants me to drive 20 miles out of my way to drop our daughter off at her house on the days she does not work, on my way to work.
a. Both attorneys said he does not have to do that he can make his own arrangements during his time with his daughter.
6. She also told both attorneys that she has not received her child support for a month. I called the
hotline that we have and it says they have mailed her the past checks for this month, so she lied.
This is some of the things I asked for;
1. I want my daughters overnight on Tuesdays like I have had her for the last three years.
a. Her response no, you just don’t want the support raised. She said I would give you one overnight on Tuesday as long as you switch the weekends that you have. Also I am not to count that night towards the child support.
b. I told her I did not care about getting credit for the Tuesdays but I was not sure if I could change weekends.
2. I said that I did not want to hear her calling me an axxhxxe on the phone in front of our daughter.
I did not want to hear her husband cussing me out on the phone in the background while my daughter was in the room at their home.
a. She responded by saying that she did not believe that either one of them had done so or my attorney asked her if she wanted to hear the tape we have. She said, if I did it was only once when I was mad. I said I have five tapes on how does your attorney have?
3. I told her I no longer wanted her interfering with me helping our daughter with her homework and if she did not stop interfering I would file contempt charges for interference.
a. She said you cannot do that and her attorney said yes he could. Legally he had every right with anything concerning her education.
4. I told her I wanted proof that our child was legally enrolled in the school she was attending with the
state having that knowledge. I also said if not, then I wanted her to sign a form stating she would be responsible for tuition charges if they come back on her for it.
5. We kept the same holiday schedule as we had in the past. At which time I wanted to know how she was going to figure that out. Her reply was she did not realize until after she hired her attorney that we had two sets of papers. I said that is a lie I sent you a copy certified back in December and you signed for them. Then you were going to try and stop me from giving my Christmas visitation time.
I also told her in the past that I tried to get her to go according to the papers and she refused.
6. I also asked her about our daughters grades and why she failing. She told me she finished the year
with a B average, I said how could she have, she had 4 D’s. She said that was a lie and I produced printed off paperwork showing all of her grades. Her attorney asked to see them and then asked her how she got a B average?
Anyway most of the two hours consisted of her telling me what I could and couldn’t do, her flailing her arms and her attorney telling her she was wrong. Her attorney also told her several times that if she continued doing the things that she was admitting to that I could very well have her back in court for contempt again.
The only way I am going to get my Tuesday overnights back is if I kiss her behind and you know what that is why this all started because we did go according to our paperwork before Thanksgiving because every time I disagreed she cut my nose off with my daughter. Well then I finally got tired of it.
I left the lawyers office and my daughter was sitting in their truck. Mom and step-dad were talking to her attorney. I heard the step-dad say well I want you to work on my case for my son, but two months ago our house payment went up and money is kind of tight but as soon as we get her thing settled we will be calling you.
I decided regardless of whether she or he liked it or not I was going to say hello to my daughter. She
got out of the truck and gave me a big hug and then said she hoped nobody seen her. Right afterwards
I left.
That night I could not sleep and as morning came I still had not. The more I thought during the night the madder I got.
I went to work and called my attorney. I asked him I said what did we accomplish, he said what do you mean. I said exactly, I paid out 850.00 for my ex to run me in the ground, tell me what she was not going to do even though she is suppose to.
Then add insult to injury she puts a price tag on our child. I told him enough is enough I am not signing any lame agreement. I want to appear in front of the judge and I am willing to except what he decides.
The last thing he said to me as I walked out the door was this: If we would have went in front of the judge today and he would of heard and seen her, he would have wondered why she even had custody when she can not make fair decisions concerning both of you co-parenting your daughter.
. I know in the state of Indiana I am entitled to have my daughter one night during the week as long as I can make sure I get her home or to school on time.
Maybe I am making the wrong decision I don’t know you tell me what you think.
I will give a summary of some of the things that she came at me with and when I did get a word in edgewise what I was asking for. Also too what the attorneys said about the request in general. I found it real interesting that during the meeting for the most part not only was my attorney on my side but hers too.
These were her requests
1. She did not want me taking our daughter to church, said I was forcing her. I told her point blank that was not true that the only time our daughter had balked was the first time we went. Now she asks to make sure are going.
a. Her attorney told her she could not control whether I took our child to church or not!
2. She said my better half was constantly calling our daughter a bxxxh.
b. My attorney asked what proof she had of this. Well our daughter told me this so I know it is true. I then asked her if she believed everything that our daughter tells her. She said well yes why wouldn’t I. I said you must be awful gullible, because I know she lies, you even told her to lie to me so you know she is capable of it.
I then repeated the statement that was made to me by our daughter about her step dad and my ex’s husband. The fact that he could not have his son unless supervised because he had made an attempt on his wife’s life and had killed the family pets. She then said that’s not true and I replied but our own daughter told it, so it has to be true.
3. She wants to change the pick up time on Sunday from 7pm to 5pm. Her reason because she gets off work at 7.
a. All I kept thinking was how does that make since and both attorneys said the same thing? So they told her 7:30pm give or take a half hour.
4. She said I call her house harassing her if our daughter says they are going out of state. She said its
none of his business what we do on our time.
b. Her attorney told her that she has to notify me and give me an emergency number where my daughter can be reached in case of an emergency.
So she threw her arms in the air and said consider yourself notified. We are going away this weekend out of state, just for your information.
Her attorney asked for a number where she could be reached. She said I have no idea where we will be, so no I don’t.
He said do you have a cell phone and she said no. He said maybe you should consider getting one. She said no way.
He then told her that if she continued to not notify me or give me a number that she would be considered to be in contempt. (This from her attorney, it was strange, he said more to her than my attorney. But I think she lied to him and told him that I was causing all of the trouble and never gave him the actual facts.)
5. She told me during my summer visitation that she wants me to drive 20 miles out of my way to drop our daughter off at her house on the days she does not work, on my way to work.
a. Both attorneys said he does not have to do that he can make his own arrangements during his time with his daughter.
6. She also told both attorneys that she has not received her child support for a month. I called the
hotline that we have and it says they have mailed her the past checks for this month, so she lied.
This is some of the things I asked for;
1. I want my daughters overnight on Tuesdays like I have had her for the last three years.
a. Her response no, you just don’t want the support raised. She said I would give you one overnight on Tuesday as long as you switch the weekends that you have. Also I am not to count that night towards the child support.
b. I told her I did not care about getting credit for the Tuesdays but I was not sure if I could change weekends.
2. I said that I did not want to hear her calling me an axxhxxe on the phone in front of our daughter.
I did not want to hear her husband cussing me out on the phone in the background while my daughter was in the room at their home.
a. She responded by saying that she did not believe that either one of them had done so or my attorney asked her if she wanted to hear the tape we have. She said, if I did it was only once when I was mad. I said I have five tapes on how does your attorney have?
3. I told her I no longer wanted her interfering with me helping our daughter with her homework and if she did not stop interfering I would file contempt charges for interference.
a. She said you cannot do that and her attorney said yes he could. Legally he had every right with anything concerning her education.
4. I told her I wanted proof that our child was legally enrolled in the school she was attending with the
state having that knowledge. I also said if not, then I wanted her to sign a form stating she would be responsible for tuition charges if they come back on her for it.
5. We kept the same holiday schedule as we had in the past. At which time I wanted to know how she was going to figure that out. Her reply was she did not realize until after she hired her attorney that we had two sets of papers. I said that is a lie I sent you a copy certified back in December and you signed for them. Then you were going to try and stop me from giving my Christmas visitation time.
I also told her in the past that I tried to get her to go according to the papers and she refused.
6. I also asked her about our daughters grades and why she failing. She told me she finished the year
with a B average, I said how could she have, she had 4 D’s. She said that was a lie and I produced printed off paperwork showing all of her grades. Her attorney asked to see them and then asked her how she got a B average?
Anyway most of the two hours consisted of her telling me what I could and couldn’t do, her flailing her arms and her attorney telling her she was wrong. Her attorney also told her several times that if she continued doing the things that she was admitting to that I could very well have her back in court for contempt again.
The only way I am going to get my Tuesday overnights back is if I kiss her behind and you know what that is why this all started because we did go according to our paperwork before Thanksgiving because every time I disagreed she cut my nose off with my daughter. Well then I finally got tired of it.
I left the lawyers office and my daughter was sitting in their truck. Mom and step-dad were talking to her attorney. I heard the step-dad say well I want you to work on my case for my son, but two months ago our house payment went up and money is kind of tight but as soon as we get her thing settled we will be calling you.
I decided regardless of whether she or he liked it or not I was going to say hello to my daughter. She
got out of the truck and gave me a big hug and then said she hoped nobody seen her. Right afterwards
I left.
That night I could not sleep and as morning came I still had not. The more I thought during the night the madder I got.
I went to work and called my attorney. I asked him I said what did we accomplish, he said what do you mean. I said exactly, I paid out 850.00 for my ex to run me in the ground, tell me what she was not going to do even though she is suppose to.
Then add insult to injury she puts a price tag on our child. I told him enough is enough I am not signing any lame agreement. I want to appear in front of the judge and I am willing to except what he decides.
The last thing he said to me as I walked out the door was this: If we would have went in front of the judge today and he would of heard and seen her, he would have wondered why she even had custody when she can not make fair decisions concerning both of you co-parenting your daughter.
. I know in the state of Indiana I am entitled to have my daughter one night during the week as long as I can make sure I get her home or to school on time.
Maybe I am making the wrong decision I don’t know you tell me what you think.
