A Wills Legallity

[jude11142]

What is the name of your state?CT
I will try and make this short and to the point. A yr and half ago, my father inlaw quitclaimed his house and the property to me. Problem is, I am his conservatrix and when we went to probate for the accounting the judge was very angry at me. He stated that I should of went to the court and asked permission for dad to "gift this to me"....Now, he said that we have to notify dads heirs, which are my husband and his brother. I have a letter that the my lawyer drafted asking them if they object to his dad doing this and my husband signed it. Now the problem, the brother was notified and called me up saying that he is entitled to half of the value because when their mom died in 95 her will said that she wants half to go to him and his kids. Well, everything was left to dad the surviving spouse. Dads son hasnt' seen his dad since mom passed away nearly 15yrs ago. A sad situation but not my doing. Dad was placed in a nsg home 2 yrs ago, by an attorney who my dad signed poa to. When we found out, I got him out of nsg home and I became his poa. This was a voluntary conservatorship. Since then, we moved upstairs(2 fam)and we have taken care of dad. He doesn't require much care, he really just lonely. My children who are not his biological grandkids, are treated as such. This is their grandfather and vice versa. The brother has never even called to say, Hi dad, how are you. Needless to say, their family dynamics were dysfunctional and they have been estranged for many yrs. Now the clincher. Tomorrow we are going to lawyers and dad is making out a new will. It isn's clear whether or not he has one floating around somewhere, since his lawyer retired and we can't seem to find one in his records. He is leaving everything to me, and if something happens to me then to my son(who he considers his grandson). I know that this may sound like a strange situation and in a way it is. Is dad obligated to leave anyone anything? Should he leave his other son any monetary gift. I think so but my father inlaw adamently refuses! His thoughts are that he has given his other son over 80 grand from an inheritence plus put down payments on 2 houses for him and many other gifts. Dad says that he has gotten more than he should of and that was only because his mom favored him over my husband. From a legal standpoint would it make a difference if he doesn't include this son in his will? Any advice? My lawyer thus far has told me that it would go more smoothly if he signed the waiver, so lets wait and see what happens. Will the probate judge hear dad out for his reasons for doing what he's done? I mean, all these yrs, and dad wasn't even invited to his only bio granddaughters wedding, for the birth of great grandkids etc..., No birthdays, no Christmas, not even a card. When I called this son nearly 2 yrs ago and asked him if he objected to me becoming dads conservator I was told, "no problem, good luck to ya, you have your hands full with him"...and that was it. I am upset because if my husband and myself didn't stay involved, dad would of been stuck in nsg home, his house would of been long gone and my father inlaw would of been miserable. Lawyer says and option is to offer brother his 50% when and if dad passes away before us. I say, "no way!" The reason being, he hasn't been involved all these yrs. I am the one paying property taxes, the upkeep of the house which is over 150 yrs old, so many things such as electric/plumbing had to be brought up to code. We need a new roof and the est is 14grand. So why should he be able to sit back, not visit, not pay anything and then get half of the worth of house? Makes no sense. Right now, my attorney filed a motion asking for the quitclaim to be a gift retroactive so that we don't lose the yr and half. I must be driving my lawyer nuts with all these emotional questions/thoughts. I just can't stand the stress. Plus dad is telling me that he is going to tell the judge and his son that there is no way that he wants him to get a dime. I have a letter from dads doctor stating that he is in sound mind and able to make decisions. Bottom line, lol, I think is what I'd like to know, where does it say that anyone has to leave anyone anything? Could the court take dads decision and go against it? I think that he should be able to do what he wants as long as he is making sound and reasonable choices. this family is not going to suddenly be reunited unfortunatley. If dad had no house, you can bet that his son would'nt even be involved. It would of continued as the past 15 yrs were, no contact. I know that money makes people do crazy things, but I would be ashamed of myself if I was in his sons position. He has never attended any of the other hearings, never gone to the hospital when dad was very sick. this is how sad this is, a month ago, dad was shopping in his sons town and one of the grandsons saw dad and went up to him and the other grandson called out and said, "get away from him". Some words were exchanged and they left. No matter what his dad did that makes him hate him so, these are still his grandsons and I feel that is terrible to say get away and don't talk to him. The poor grandson is mildly retarded and doesn't really understand. I'll stop because, I am letting emotions run wild here.
Does anyone have any advice? How do courts get to decide on things such as our situation? Please help
Thanks,
JUDE

 

[BlondiePB]

jude11142,
This reply is based on the laws governing conservators/guardians and what heirs are entitled to rather than what heirs deserve. Please keep this in mind when you are reading this. What has occurred here is an example of how much scrutiny conservators/guardians are under by the court in regard to a ward and a ward's property.

A yr and half ago, my father inlaw quitclaimed his house and the property to me. Problem is, I am his conservatrix and when we went to probate for the accounting the judge was very angry at me. He stated that I should of went to the court and asked permission for dad to "gift this to me"....Now, he said that we have to notify dads heirs, which are my husband and his brother. I have a letter that the my lawyer drafted asking them if they object to his dad doing this and my husband signed it. Now the problem, the brother was notified and called me up saying that he is entitled to half of the value because when their mom died in 95 her will said that she wants half to go to him and his kids. Well, everything was left to dad the surviving spouse. Dads son hasnt' seen his dad since mom passed away.

Whether or not BIL deserves any of dad's estate and regardless of BIL's estrangement from his father, a conservator/guardian cannot make any changes in a ward's estate without permission of the court. This is a serious violation, and the judge is justified in his distain with what you did. Without a valid will, it is up to the judge whether or not the will that is being drafted by your attorney leaving everything to you will be accepted. Without
co-operation from your BIL, I have my doubts as to the court accepting a new will leaving everything to you. This serious violation has triggered you to being under a microscope by the court.

I have a letter from dads doctor stating that he is in sound mind and able to make decisions.

The following quote is what you wrote in your thread in the Elder Law section of this forum:

That bank has on record that I am conservatrix of both person and estate. After about 7 months dad starts having problems with memory,can't find things etc....all of this is documented. I find out that he has been going to the bank and taking out money in the amt of 1500.00, somethimes 2-3 a month. That is beyond the spending money I give him. I go to the bank and tell them that he is not to touch that money etc....I get nowhere. I have them look on file for documents, they tell me that the only money I have access to is the money in the conservatorship acct. I talk to somebody at the VA in the guardianship dept what is going on and they can't believe it. I am told to get that money out of that acct asap!!! Again, I go the bank, make out a withdrawel slip and I am denied. Again, told that I don't have any access to that money. Another time, I get a refund check from sears, because he went ahead on his own and bought a 2600.00 snowblower and paid it twice. He charged it to his card, went the next day, took money out of bank, they went to the store and pd it, then when bill came a few days later, before payment was posted, he paid again....I go to the bank that the check is written on and try to cash it and I am told that I cannot. I give them the paper that states conservatorship but that means squat. I don't know why that day, I went to that bank instead of depositing into the conservator acct, but neither here or there, that paper meant nothing. They told me that if he comes in they will cash it with two forms of ID. I explain that I can bring him in but they are not supposed to do that becasuse he is uncapable to make decisions, I will even have to put his hand on the check and get him started to sign the check. Even when they ask for his ID, he'll look at me, because he don't know what they want etc....

Is there an explanation to the conflict here??

Bottom line, lol, I think is what I'd like to know, where does it say that anyone has to leave anyone anything? Could the court take dads decision and go against it? I think that he should be able to do what he wants as long as he is making sound and reasonable choices.

It looks as though it is the judge who will be deciding on the distribution of the will.

I predict a lot of problems with this conservatorship in addition to the ones that have already occurred. I found the statutes for CT that are on-line to be a pain to go through. Most states have similiar statutes. Check the guardian statutes for FL (Chpt. 744) at www.flsenate.gov/statutes. There's an very nice feature "view entire chapter". Until you get the deed and estate papers straightened out, you need to hold off on the roof repair. You need to understand very clearly what you can do without a court order and what you cannot do without a court order. As you have found out the hard way, this is very serious and a huge responsibility. I'm glad you have an attorney now; however, you really must know what is appropriate in your duties as a conservator.

 

[Dandy Don]

You say "Everything was left to dad in Mom's will." So, is what brother said true or not true: did her will say that he was entitled to half the value of the estate or just half of the home? If true, then why wasn't he given that during her probate? Why weren't BOTH kids names added to the house deed/title--during mom's probate--instead of dad just quitclaiming it to only you? If not true, then he has no basis for wanting anything. Better have the attorney look at mom's will to see if brother would have grounds to sue later or not and whether dad had the right to quitclaim the house only to you.

Dad is perfectly within his rights to disinherit his son if he wishes to, He should ask an attorney to revise the will to leave the disinherited son a small, specific amount of money (typically it is $1.00 or $5.00) and he should also mention the reason he is disinheriting son (his unhappiness with his sons actions or the fact that he gave his son substantial amounts of money during his lifetime). This language will make the will impossible for son to contest. If the small amounts and reasons are not there, son would have grounds to contest by saying father somehow "forgot" to include him.

DANDY DON IN OKLAHOMA (tiekh@yahoo.com)

 

[BlondiePB]

You say "Everything was left to dad in Mom's will." So, is what brother said true or not true: did her will say that he was entitled to half the value of the estate or just half of the home? If true, then why wasn't he given that during her probate? Why weren't BOTH kids names added to the house deed/title--during mom's probate--instead of dad just quitclaiming it to only you? If not true, then he has no basis for wanting anything. Better have the attorney look at mom's will to see if brother would have grounds to sue later or not and whether dad had the right to quitclaim the house only to you.

Dad is perfectly within his rights to disinherit his son if he wishes to, He should ask an attorney to revise the will to leave the disinherited son a small, specific amount of money (typically it is $1.00 or $5.00) and he should also mention the reason he is disinheriting son (his unhappiness with his sons actions or the fact that he gave his son substantial amounts of money during his lifetime). This language will make the will impossible for son to contest. If the small amounts and reasons are not there, son would have grounds to contest by saying father somehow "forgot" to include him.

DANDY DON IN OKLAHOMA (tiekh@yahoo.com)

Dandy Don,
The conservatorship was established PRIOR to the original poster, quit claiming the house to herself. Therefore, the original poster, and any conservator/guardian CANNOT make any changes to an estate WITHOUT court approval, including the drafting of a new will for a ward. This has nothing to do with whether the BIL deserves anything or is entitled to anything as is claimed by the BIL. In fact, the OP could be charged with embezzlement. The OP is very fortunate that the judge has not done so and is taking the appropriate steps to rectify the situation according to law not according to what is deserved. It will be up to the judge to decide whether or not the court will accept the will that is being drafted by the conservator's attorney. There are no ifs, whats, and buts about it.
BlondiePB

 

[jude11142]

I want to thank all who have replied. This is a messy situation and something that I never thought would be so difficult. To try and clarify some of the questions asked, as for the will(I understand that it may not be valid), the lawyer did ask that dad go himself to do will and he has. As Dandy Don mentioned she did ask him why he was choosing to have his first son left out. It was stated that he recieved 80,000 from an inheritence that dad got from his brother. Why me husband(the other son)didn't get anything, who really knows? I was told that at the time, my husband had his own company, no children, no outstanding bills etc...and the other brother had young children, wasn't working much and the main point which I think the case was, mom told dad , "why don't you give it to ****". Again, this seems not to be a close family and not one without problems. Mom favored first son and dad the other. So, in the new will which states the $$ it also reads that he has been taken care of during his lifetime. Lawyer did encourage and dad did agree to leave $500 to him also.
As for moms will..........we don't have a copy of the will and from the attorney says most likely her will left everything to her husband, leaving it for him to do as he chooses. I do know that when she passed away, both sons got 5,000.00. I don't know anything else re: her will.

I did not quitclaim the house to myself, dad did this. Do you mean that because I was conservator at the time, it means that I did?

Some may think that this is wrong but maybe it will give some insight. My husband was married before and company was in both spouses name. His ex was cheating on him and on company at the same time he started getting sick. While he had his first of 4 heart attacks, she served him with divorce papers and turned whatever assets they had into cash and took off. After divorce, bank went after both of them for truck loans. My husband had nothing, he went from being a business man making a good living, to being disabled and living on a fixed income. They went after her, because she bought a house....etc...then she went after him sueing him. Anyways, dad is afraid that she will go after him if he leaves the house to him. For 2 yrs, he pd 50.00 month until hubby got a lawyer who told him that they cant take money from his disability. So, this is one of the reasons dad wants to leave the house to me, that and because we are involved in his life and he in ours. My children have been grandchildren to him for the last 15 yrs. He has been excluded from his sons family for all these yrs. Again, it's a sad story.
Court date is now changed to Dec 8th and I can't wait for this to be over. I never realized how serious it is to being a conservator and everything involved. Prior to this, I had a quiet and peaceful life. I have never been to courts/lawyers like this in my lifetime. The court date is for my peroidic accounting and to ask the court for permission to make gift(the quitclaim).

Thank you all again. I know can understand why the judge was so upset. I suppose that I am glad that this has happened now, so that we can make sure everything is legal. Plus, it's good to know that the courts do take this seriousely so that people don't get taken advantaged of. I am appreciative in the fact that dad loves me and trusts me enough to put his house in my name. Hopefully the court will allow this but if not then so be it. I will still be dads "daughter" and be there everyday like always.

 

[jude11142]

jude11142,

I predict a lot of problems with this conservatorship in addition to the ones that have already occurred. I found the statutes for CT that are on-line to be a pain to go through. Most states have similiar statutes. Check the guardian statutes for FL (Chpt. 744) at www.flsenate.gov/statutes. There's an very nice feature "view entire chapter". Until you get the deed and estate papers straightened out, you need to hold off on the roof repair. You need to understand very clearly what you can do without a court order and what you cannot do without a court order. As you have found out the hard way, this is very serious and a huge responsibility. I'm glad you have an attorney now; however, you really must know what is appropriate in your duties as a conservator.

Thank you Blondie for the link. I was just reading through it and found it to be very informative. Sure wish that I knew alot of that stuff before all of this, lol.
Thanks again,
JUDE

 

[BlondiePB]

Thank you Blondie for the link. I was just reading through it and found it to be very informative. Sure wish that I knew alot of that stuff before all of this, lol.
Thanks again,
JUDE

You're welcome. Not all state statutes have such specifics. Now you understand that voluntary is treated the same as involuntary, and that dad doing the quit claim to you is the same as you doing the quit claim to yourself. And now you understand that it will be up to the judge to decide about the will, regardless of whether or not BIL deserves any of the estate.

With your better understanding of all this, you need to have your attorney petition the court for permission for dad's monthly allowance. Ask your attorney the appropriate way to give dad his allowance, otherwise you'll find yourself back in front of the judge. Other than the normal expenditures for your "dad", should he need a purchase that costs $500.00 or more, petition the court for permission to do so. The court certainly is very protective of a ward as you have found out. Take good care of dad, your family, and yourself.

Best regards,

BlondiePB