Abandonment

[Pink Lotus]

What is the name of your state? Texas


Hi I am trying to find out at what length of days or weeks is considered abandonment by a parent? The reason Im asking is My fiancee's ex left her daughters with us for 14 days straight while she took off to Dallas to "work".


He just came out of a graduation plan to EOW! His merits date is the 31st and She came to us before she left (last Friday) crying her eyes out that her whole family tells her what to do and that she cant handle the girls!
So Im wondering if this is or not.

It's just odd that the merits of the custody case are the 31st of this month and she does this right before that!

Thanks for any help and/or advice.

 

[Ohiogal]

No way no how is this considered abandonment.

 

[Bloopy]

What is the name of your state? Texas


Hi I am trying to find out at what length of days or weeks is considered abandonment by a parent? The reason Im asking is My fiancee's ex left her daughters with us for 14 days straight while she took off to Dallas to "work".


He just came out of a graduation plan to EOW! His merits date is the 31st and She came to us before she left (last Friday) crying her eyes out that her whole family tells her what to do and that she cant handle the girls!
So Im wondering if this is or not.

Leaving the child with her Dad is not abandonment.

If I were Dad, I’d make sure to be able to prove that child has been with me for extended periods. Daycare sign in/sign out sheets, Signing the homework journal, whatever.

In the future this will go towards proving that Dad is trustworthy enough to handle more than EOW and that Mom thinks so too.

Be glad that Mom is willing to turn to Dad when things get hot. The alternative is to keep ‘em anyway.

 

[Pink Lotus]

No way no how is this considered abandonment.

Would this be something to tell the Judge on the 31st?
I mean it went from He can never ever see his kids, to dropped off, here ya go.
What would be considered abandonment??
These children are 20 months old: so to be without a parent for 14 days when the mother was the only parent out of the two they knew until september.

 

[Pink Lotus]

Leaving the child with her Dad is not abandonment.

If I were Dad, I’d make sure to be able to prove that child has been with me for extended periods. Daycare sign in/sign out sheets, Signing the homework journal, whatever.

In the future this will go towards proving that Dad is trustworthy enough to handle more than EOW and that Mom thinks so too.

Be glad that Mom is willing to turn to Dad when things get hot. The alternative is to keep ‘em anyway.

They are not in Daycare and Mom lives in another county. I dont think that the alternative should be keeping them away from him. Thats a mistake every mother doing that makes and I hate seeing that!
Dad just keeps his own journal about what is going on.. She asked that we take the girls for 4 weeks on and 2 weeks off with her if we move for Dads job. I found that to be odd too. He just asked for two weeks special provision in the order in case of work he has to go to Arizona for a bit.

 

[Bloopy]

Would this be something to tell the Judge on the 31st?
I mean it went from He can never ever see his kids, to dropped off, here ya go.
What would be considered abandonment??
These children are 20 months old: so to be without a parent for 14 days when the mother was the only parent out of the two they knew until september.

Lose the word abandonment.

If Mom argues in court that the children must have daily contact with her, blah blah, blah. The two-week stay rebuts that.

What does Dad want?

 

[Pink Lotus]

Lose the word abandonment.

If Mom argues in court that the children must have daily contact with her, blah blah, blah. The two-week stay rebuts that.

What does Dad want?

Well she says she will agree to every other week as dad does too, but he wants to see if she would let him be primary due to her not having a home and no job and lives with her abusive mother. Also some other issues such as mom refusing dr appts and so forth.

Dad does not want to fight in court so to say and will agree to anything so long as he has half time. She came to us and cried telling us she cant do it, she cant handle it and cant handle her family, So any agreement we come up with by the 31st and submit to a judge would be beneficial. Mom even stayed two nights with us before she left. I mean I know that sounds soo odd but Dad and I figured any time she is with us he sees his daughters. Her family hate him and me.
Most the time we buy the medicine she asks for ( not rx) and give her gas money.

 

[garrula lingua]

Pink Lotus,
Stay out of this.

They are Dad's kids and Mom & Dad should be able to share custody and problems regarding the kids. It's not your business.
Let the parents work out their relationship - don't comment.

If you don't like it, get a guy who doesn't have kids.

 

[Isis1]

- definition of child abandonmenr: Many States and territories now provide definitions for child abandonment in their reporting laws. Approximately 18 States and the District of Columbia include abandonment in their definition of abuse or neglect.15 Approximately 13 States, Guam, Puerto Rico, and the Virgin Islands provide separate definitions for establishing abandonment.16 In general, it is considered abandonment of the child when the parent's identity or whereabouts are unknown, the child has been left by the parent in circumstances in which the child suffers serious harm, or the parent has failed to maintain contact with the child or to provide reasonable support for a specified period of time.

i really REALLY hate that term. my children's dad loves to use that term in all of his pleading and declarations.

 

[Pink Lotus]

Pink Lotus,
Stay out of this.

They are Dad's kids and Mom & Dad should be able to share custody and problems regarding the kids. It's not your business.
Let the parents work out their relationship - don't comment.

If you don't like it, get a guy who doesn't have kids.

Actually Mom came to Me, she calls Me and Asks Me for money. I am involved and Your words cant change that. But my life is changing too and If i wanted to leave I had more reason to do so several months back and I would have if I chose to!

I am just getting answers to questions.

 

[Bloopy]

Well she says she will agree to every other week as dad does too, but he wants to see if she would let him be primary due to her not having a home and no job and lives with her abusive mother. Also some other issues such as mom refusing dr appts and so forth.

Dad does not want to fight in court so to say and will agree to anything so long as he has half time. She came to us and cried telling us she cant do it, she cant handle it and cant handle her family, So any agreement we come up with by the 31st and submit to a judge would be beneficial. Mom even stayed two nights with us before she left. I mean I know that sounds soo odd but Dad and I figured any time she is with us he sees his daughters. Her family hate him and me.
Most the time we buy the medicine she asks for ( not rx) and give her gas money.

I think 50/50 physical is a sweet deal to be offered so soon and Dad ought not to press his luck.

If in the future, that plays out as 75% Dad, 25% Mom or whatever, modify using status quo.

 

[Pink Lotus]

- definition of child abandonmenr: Many States and territories now provide definitions for child abandonment in their reporting laws. Approximately 18 States and the District of Columbia include abandonment in their definition of abuse or neglect.15 Approximately 13 States, Guam, Puerto Rico, and the Virgin Islands provide separate definitions for establishing abandonment.16 In general, it is considered abandonment of the child when the parent's identity or whereabouts are unknown, the child has been left by the parent in circumstances in which the child suffers serious harm, or the parent has failed to maintain contact with the child or to provide reasonable support for a specified period of time.

i really REALLY hate that term. my children's dad loves to use that term in all of his pleading and declarations.

I was just curious. I dont think she is purposly doing it but I think she is scared and wants to get away but for legal purposes and that definition of abandonments asking what it would mean in this. Thanks

 

[Pink Lotus]

I think 50/50 physical is a sweet deal to be offered so soon and Dad ought not to press his luck.

If in the future, that plays out as 75% Dad, 25% Mom or whatever, modify using status quo.

Oh I know... I think he is scared she wont hold up. Sorry but what is status quo??

And thanks Bloopy. I do appreciate!

 

[Pink Lotus]

Thanks to everyone for your answers too!!

 

[mommyof4]

You got the correct answer. Just because nobody told you that, "Heck YEAH...she abandoned the kids!!!!" doesn't make it wrong.

Abandonment isn't even in the kitchen, much less on the table.

Your life is changing because you put yourself into this situation. If you want to continue a successful relationship with this man and his children, I suggest you read up on what your role is to be and how to conduct yourself.

I promise, it will make your life MUCH easier (not to mention the kids, but hey? Who said they were the most important, right?)