Advice on how to proceed...

[caravelle]

What is the name of your state? Georgia

I'll try to make this as brief as I can while including pertinent details. Four months ago, my 14 year old son chose to live with his father after being "manipulated". A month ago he told me he wanted to come home. We had a hearing with the Judge and my son is back home with me. My ex-husband, who I am convinced has some very deep emotional problems, has gone off the deep end. His most recent act has been to fabricate a very nasty e-mail that he told our son came from me. He didn't show it to our son on the computer - apparently, he printed it off and showed it to him briefly. My question is this - it is fairly easy to determine where an e-mail originated (assuming he didn't just do a "cut and paste" job.) Is this worth pursuing on my part, and what would the criminal act actually be called?

 

[VeronicaGia]

I have no idea what you're asking. What exactly would you pursue? What criminal act has been committed? And what does it have to do with child custody?

 

[SuzieWahoozie]

I think the OP is asking if her ex committed a criminal act because he "falsified" an e-mail to make it look like it was sent from her computer. She wants to know how to find out where the e-mail really originated, and if this is a criminal act. I have no idea. If he had hacked into HER computer and the e-mail actually did "originate" from there, I believe that is a criminal act, but is sending an e-mail from your own computer using someone else's e-mail address as the sender a crime? I dunno!

 

[caravelle]

Sorry - this is the first chance I've had to respond. Suzie - you are correct - I'm trying to figure out if it is a criminal act to fabricate an e-mail. I am fairly certain he did not hack into my e-mail, so I'm thinking he just did some funky things to make it look like it came from me. Is that illegal, or just a sign of someone who has truly snapped?

 

[SMURFEELAW]

I want to quote one of our regulars here although I am embarrassed to admit I can't remember which. "Is this a hill worth dying on?" Seems your son is aware that dad is a manipulator and that your son is 14 he will see the truth and why go into an all out brawl and stress enjoy your son.

 

[caravelle]

Smurfeelaw, I totally understand where you're coming from but this is just the tip of the iceberg. My son just decided to come back home and live with me. The Judge in this case instructed BOTH of us to avoid ANY discussions that included guilt, manipulation, pressure, etc. Since that instruction, my ex has pulled my son out of class at school to pressure him, has called him to simply yell and give guilt trips, etc. NEVER in 14 years has my son not wanted to go to his father's house (and I wouldn't have allowed it anyway), but this past week he told his father he would not go with him because all he did was yell at him for deciding to come back.

 

[stealth2]

I want to quote one of our regulars here although I am embarrassed to admit I can't remember which. "Is this a hill worth dying on?"

That would be me.

(not directed specifically to the OP) This is exactly why children aren't generally considered mature enough to choose which parent they want to live with. If you, as a parent, do not feel that the child should be living with the other parent for reasons other than your own desires - DO NOT AGREE! Make the other parent take it to court. However, if you feel that you must allow the child to give it a shot - DO NOT ALLOW you child the option of flitting back and forth. If s/he is going to choose that move, then make sure s/he understands that it is a choice that s/he will have to live with for a certain period of time (except in cases where the child is actually being abused). Allowing the child to choose to move back and forth gives the kid way too much manipulative power. /soapbox

OP - what your ex did isn't necessarily "illegal" but it is likely contempt of court. Even if you HAD written that email.

 

[caravelle]

Thanks Stealth - contempt of court of sort of what I thought. My son absolutely understands that there will be no "flitting" back and forth. I think he has truly seen that the grass is not greener, but his dad just can't accept it. I think that this law in Georgia has to be one of the more stupid ones - a 14 year old can't drive, can't vote, can't see an R rated movie, but can make this choice. It's absurd.