Altering transportation.

[SMURFEELAW]

My fiance has done it all. At one point mom was responsible for all travel at one point he was, they met in the middle for awhile (keep in mind this seems prime but we met at a gas station and are in AZ if mom was an hour late we could be sitting either in a hot car that the a/c doesn't blow terrific if not driving or outside in up to 115 degrees. My suggestion and what seems to work best and be fair is receiving party picks up. On fridays your bf can drive to go get the child and on sundays mom has to come get the child. That way the child is in the comfort of their home if anyone is late or whatever.

 

[Chelle0511]

My fiance has done it all. At one point mom was responsible for all travel at one point he was, they met in the middle for awhile (keep in mind this seems prime but we met at a gas station and are in AZ if mom was an hour late we could be sitting either in a hot car that the a/c doesn't blow terrific if not driving or outside in up to 115 degrees. My suggestion and what seems to work best and be fair is receiving party picks up. On fridays your bf can drive to go get the child and on sundays mom has to come get the child. That way the child is in the comfort of their home if anyone is late or whatever.

I totally agree! This is what we are going to strive for! It only makes sense! Plus, she complains when we are 5 minutes late bringing her home (keep in mind that we have a little one) so this is the solution! Oh yeah~that 5 minutes (actually 4) was the reason that she would not let my fiance see his daughter for 1 month!

 

[SMURFEELAW]

That's what we found too also it is easy to get a hold of the parent that has the child if the one picking up is running late b/c that parent is at home. Things happen... traffic, accidents, flat tires trouble with another child so the child has to be where they are safe and secure and not WAITING especially if you ever get to the point where one parent stops showing up to this day we can't drive past the "meeting spot" w/o the child pointing it out and probably remembering the few times mom was a no show.

 

[Chelle0511]

That's what we found too also it is easy to get a hold of the parent that has the child if the one picking up is running late b/c that parent is at home. Things happen... traffic, accidents, flat tires trouble with another child so the child has to be where they are safe and secure and not WAITING especially if you ever get to the point where one parent stops showing up to this day we can't drive past the "meeting spot" w/o the child pointing it out and probably remembering the few times mom was a no show.

Do you think that we have a fair chance of the judge seeing it this way without an attorney? I know that she will not have one unless it is public aide.

 

[SMURFEELAW]

Well it will not be easy but I can tell you that when me and my fiance got together his ex wife had taken off with his child 200 miles away and he only had supervised visitation due to trumped up charges(and my stb husbands' heartache- he kept his child and step-child from mom- okay for his child real close to kidnapping concerning the step-child though) That was in Feb 2002. In June of 2002 he received 50/50 physical. Since August 1 2004 mom has seen the child 12 days 3 of which were unsupervised she now has to come to dads town and be supervised by dad. We never had a lawyer. But again I don't recommend it. if you can afford one its worth it.

 

[Chelle0511]

Well it will not be easy but I can tell you that when me and my fiance got together his ex wife had taken off with his child 200 miles away and he only had supervised visitation due to trumped up charges(and my stb husbands' heartache- he kept his child and step-child from mom- okay for his child real close to kidnapping concerning the step-child though) That was in Feb 2002. In June of 2002 he received 50/50 physical. Since August 1 2004 mom has seen the child 12 days 3 of which were unsupervised she now has to come to dads town and be supervised by dad. We never had a lawyer. But again I don't recommend it. if you can afford one its worth it.

You fought for physical custody with no attorney? The grounds being that she took off with the child? Correct?

 

[lissa23]

My husband is in a similar situation. Were the court order says ex is supposed to drop off his daughter to him on Friday night and he is supposed to take her home on Sunday. Ex now has no car, no job, and a suspended license, and has moved 25 miles away ( anyone living in CA in the bay area knows that 25 miles one way can take 45 to 60 minutes with so much traffic at 6:00PM). So now he has to pick her up and drop her off EOW. He was told not to even bother going to court and get the ex for contempt as the judge might be more anoyed then anything. But he is going back to court to modify the holiday schedule (as there is none) so he will bring it up then and see what happens. Its fusturating I know!

 

[SMURFEELAW]

You fought for physical custody with no attorney? The grounds being that she took off with the child? Correct?

Yes. In AZ a parent cannot remove a child more than 100 miles w/o permission from the judge or the other parent. The judge got mad at mom b/c he told her not to and gave my stb hubby 50/50 visitation mom still had sole legal. Then this past Aug mom had made a few bad choices and in oct dad was given joint legal with primary residential and mom only got supervised visits. Now mom has to come to us to see the child under dads terms. All w/o a lawyer (although I have finished 2 years of law school) but I still say it is not a recommendation I think we are a unique story.

 

[Chelle0511]

Yes. In AZ a parent cannot remove a child more than 100 miles w/o permission from the judge or the other parent. The judge got mad at mom b/c he told her not to and gave my stb hubby 50/50 visitation mom still had sole legal. Then this past Aug mom had made a few bad choices and in oct dad was given joint legal with primary residential and mom only got supervised visits. Now mom has to come to us to see the child under dads terms. All w/o a lawyer (although I have finished 2 years of law school) but I still say it is not a recommendation I think we are a unique story.

I'm sure that is a unique story, but if the judge sees a child is better off with the NCP, to me he is going to see this whether the NCP has an attorney or not. We just don't have 15K to invest in an attorney at this time. Then on the other side, there is a child living with a parent that keeps her from her father, lives with her b/f which was recently in prison for meth, etc. I guess I feel if the judge sees our side he will see it, and if not he won't. Let me know what you are thinking since you have the education!

 

[SMURFEELAW]

I'm sure that is a unique story, but if the judge sees a child is better off with the NCP, to me he is going to see this whether the NCP has an attorney or not. We just don't have 15K to invest in an attorney at this time. Then on the other side, there is a child living with a parent that keeps her from her father, lives with her b/f which was recently in prison for meth, etc. I guess I feel if the judge sees our side he will see it, and if not he won't. Let me know what you are thinking since you have the education!

If boyfriend has recent meth problems I would at least request a restraining order on behalf of the child against bf, we got one although there were DV issues, none that we could prove involved the child specifically but enough to worry about the childs mental wellbeing. Don't bash the other side, as much as you may want to, the judge needs to see that the parent with primary custody will foster a relationship with the other parent. Also be sure you stay on top of everything going on. Trust me I understand not having the $$ but that means your job is twice as hard. DOCUMENT DOCUMENT DOCUMENT! Try the local police department where mom is usually if bf is on drugs then there has been some DV, just hope it has been reported, if there is dv then the judge is a fool to let the children stay in that home.

 

[Chelle0511]

If boyfriend has recent meth problems I would at least request a restraining order on behalf of the child against bf, we got one although there were DV issues, none that we could prove involved the child specifically but enough to worry about the childs mental wellbeing. Don't bash the other side, as much as you may want to, the judge needs to see that the parent with primary custody will foster a relationship with the other parent. Also be sure you stay on top of everything going on. Trust me I understand not having the $$ but that means your job is twice as hard. DOCUMENT DOCUMENT DOCUMENT! Try the local police department where mom is usually if bf is on drugs then there has been some DV, just hope it has been reported, if there is dv then the judge is a fool to let the children stay in that home.

Ok, DV meaing? Not sure what this abbreviation means.

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

DV= Domestic Violence

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

And Smurf AZ does not require that you have a Judges "permission" neccesarily. It just requires that you notify in writing the courts as well as the other parent. Now if the other parent contest the move then yes a court date is set and you go before a judge. While a lot of times the other parent does not consent to the move they do not respond to the letter thru the courts so technically you could move with out the other parents consent or a judges approval.

 

[Chelle0511]

DV= Domestic Violence

The police can't tell me if he was arrested for domestic violence can they?

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

I don't know about your state but I do know that in Arizona you can go online to a public access site and it shows you court records such as what was filed against so and so. Shoot it even has a record of a speeding ticket on there that I recieved back in 95 oy! lol Do a search online stating your state and court records or public access to court records.