Bio Mother

[FM step mom]

I am sorry, I am new to this and trying to give you enough detail so you can help me.

I say WE because I married my husband knowing he had a child and was excited to share my life with her and him. We are both heart broken by what is being done to this child and we can't figure out what the mother needs or wants from us to make it stop other then sign his rights away which is what she keeps asking my husband to do.

Is that the only solution for my husband to stop the madness?

 

[Bloopy]

Here’s my little summary

Mom is the primary residence.... mother harasses...

NO SHOWS
- August
- September
- October the mother showed… mother showed up 1 1/2 late … (Mother refuses to give child to Step-mom) Mother told cops that she would drive child to dad got on the highway going north bound but never showed up.

... (Mom says bad stuff about dad)

Dad needs to take mom for contempt for these instances of withholding visitation. He should ask for make-up visitation. Dad should request the custody order say, “Neither parent may disparage the other parent…”

It wasn’t smart for you to go to pick-up given the “drama,” but lesson learned.

Dad already filed contempt charges. When? Its been three months, did he just do it now?

 

[FM step mom]

Yes, lesson learned but it had not been a problem in the past and my husband had store inventory and a corporate auditor there all unplanned. Rare, and will never happen again i am sure. so that is why I went. But she was and 1 1/2 late so I am guessing she planned a fight just not with me.

Dad filed contempt charges originally in September after missed visit and then scheduled court date and ex-wife attorney could meet until Nov 16 and then again had to delayed until December 3. I am sure so we "HE" didn't get Thanksgiving visitation this year and hoping that we "he" won't get Christmas either.

Last week she requested that I the step mom not do pick up and we agreed and then she came back with suspended or supervised visitation until a counselor resolves why the child is scared.

My question is by family law other then not showing up she isn't doing anything wrong how does he resolve this issue. I don't like speaking of this or calling it this but the mother is brainwashing the child about her time her.

When child is with mother child acts totally different.

Thanks for your help.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

What does it say exactly in the court order about parenting time?

 

[FM step mom]

He has standard visitation over 100 miles in the state of Texas, one weekend a month with a 14 day written notice, hoildays every other year, since over 100 miles he gets spring break every year and 42 days in summer.

Anyone can pick up the child that the parent request to do so. Grandmother did all drops off for the last year not the mother, and my husband does all drop off and pick up himself except the 3 times that I have done in the last 3 years.

 

[FM step mom]

Is counseling the only help we can provide the child while here? Is just seems cruel, and my husband wants to step in and protect her but how?

Do we try to get a case study but does that do really any good since from the out side all looks well there is no abuse, or anything like that but i believe mental is almost worse. Hard to change what she is being told 27 days out of the month in 3.

Child has a counselor here and went all summer long so we will conitnue that when she comes back.

 

[FM step mom]

Step daughter actually like the counselor they play war and other things that helps her just talk openly. My step daughter likes to spend time with me although that is exact opposite of what she is telling her mother right now and I understand that is is alot easier for the mother to attack me and not her dad.

I sew blanket nothing special and it seems like when we are in there just the two of us she just talks away and I try not to say to much and just let her talk so i know where she is coming from. I realize I am just the step mom but I do love her and wish that we didn't have to go through this for what seems like very selfish reason on the mothers part.

You think if you are doing right by the child that that would mean something to the other parent, but in this case doing right just gets in the mothers way and makes her mad. I some times wonder if she doesn't wish she had a deadbeat dad and step mom on her hands so she would have the daughter all to herself.

Have you ever heard of a parent coordinator? Someone recommended that to me and i found one online that is in the child city and ours. Mother doesn't seem to excited about someone regulating her, those were her words.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

OP - look up parent coordinator under one of my threads. I copied an article from the Wall Street Journal a while back. It describes their function.

I think I'll be asking for one from the judge today.

 

[FM step mom]

Question?
We saw our attorney today and talked about our options for court and we talked about parent alination which is obviously going on here. My question is does this hold up in court? What about about frivolous modification filing? I don't want to waste the courts time or money on things that won't hold up.

We have no real issues other then mother is just controling and unhappy. My husband has always paid child support and shown up for visitation who would think this is a bad thing??????

 

[stealth2]

Question?
We saw our attorney today and talked about our options for court and we talked about parent alination which is obviously going on here. My question is does this hold up in court? What about about frivolous modification filing? I don't want to waste the courts time or money on things that won't hold up.

We have no real issues other then mother is just controling and unhappy. My husband has always paid child support and shown up for visitation who would think this is a bad thing??????

I guess the "we" thing didn't sink in.

 

[Ohiogal]

I guess the "we" thing didn't sink in.

Nope. And I am not going to answer this poster until she shows THAT she has LEARNED something from prior postings.