Can anyone help with this

[Mommyof2Girls]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania

I have a question regarding Paternity Testing. There is not a message board for my question and I wasn't sure where to post it. It is sort of a long post so I didn't want to write it out if no one could help me. In short I had to get a DNA test done so that my daughter could get SSI. Her father passed away 3 weeks after she was born. His divorce was not final when he passed and his wife has fought me all the way. Now I am told that I have to give her a copy of the DNA report. I don't feel that I should have to share this information with anyone, especially not her. If anyone can help me I would be more than happy to post the whole story. Thank you in advance.

 

[stealth2]

Well, if there are estate issues that she's involved with - she likely needs to know the results of the DNA test. Why is this a big deal? She is..... his wife.

 

[Mommyof2Girls]

Well, if there are estate issues that she's involved with - she likely needs to know the results of the DNA test. Why is this a big deal? She is..... his wife.

She is executer of his estate. He was young and what little there was is just enough for her to pay off the debt that they incurred during the marriage. I signed legal papers stating that I would not go after any estate money my daughter was entitled too.

Yes, she was his wife but they were separated and divorce papers were filed. They did not live together. It is a very big deal to me. I only had DNA done for SSI reasons. I did not get a copy of the results for myself, in fact I never even seen the report. Its not really her that this is about but who she would give the papers too. I am fighting to keep his family (not her or his kids) away from my daughter because they are so unfit. You cant possible understand how big a deal this really is.

 

[stealth2]

Being separated and papers filed is totally meaningless in the current situation - he was still married. The whole family thing? Sorry, but you picked him - and he didn't live in a vaccuum.

 

[Phnx02]

She is executer of his estate. He was young and what little there was is just enough for her to pay off the debt that they incurred during the marriage. I signed legal papers stating that I would not go after any estate money my daughter was entitled too.

Yes, she was his wife but they were separated and divorce papers were filed. They did not live together. It is a very big deal to me. I only had DNA done for SSI reasons. I did not get a copy of the results for myself, in fact I never even seen the report. Its not really her that this is about but who she would give the papers too. I am fighting to keep his family (not her or his kids) away from my daughter because they are so unfit. You cant possible understand how big a deal this really is.

You should be entitled to a copy of the DNA results....the exact same document the wife is asking for. Contact whichever agency performed the test and ask for a copy. Giving her a copy shouldn't be that big of a deal. All the form says is his name, your name, the child's name, and a bunch of numbers and percentages......showing the mathmatical results of the blood test. There really isn't any other "private" information on the form that you should be worried about. (On my results form, neither parent's SS# was even listed). If you don't want his family around, then just tell them so. Since the father has passed, they have no legal right to visitation or custody.

 

[LdiJ]

You should be entitled to a copy of the DNA results....the exact same document the wife is asking for. Contact whichever agency performed the test and ask for a copy. Giving her a copy shouldn't be that big of a deal. All the form says is his name, your name, the child's name, and a bunch of numbers and percentages......showing the mathmatical results of the blood test. There really isn't any other "private" information on the form that you should be worried about. (On my results form, neither parent's SS# was even listed). If you don't want his family around, then just tell them so. Since the father has passed, they have no legal right to visitation or custody.

Actually, there could be a very sound reason why she should NOT provide them with a copy of the DNA test. Most state laws do not allow grandparents to sue for visitation in an unwed situation, unless paternity has been legally established. A parent passing away is grounds in ALL states with valid gpv statutes, for a grandparent to sue for visitation.

That DNA test legally establishes paternity since it was done for SS purposes.

Therefore, since she wishes to keep the family away, it would not be sound legal strategy to turn over the DNA test. In fact it might not even be wise for her to obtain her own copy. She can't turn over what she doesn't have.

 

[haiku]

why would it be neccessary for the wife to have a copy of the DNA test, and even so, how could it help the family get visitation?

if the child now recieves SS wouldn't that prove already be an heir to the estate anyway? Without having to give a DNA test result to the wife?

maybe this should post to the wills and estate forum?

 

[LdiJ]

why would it be neccessary for the wife to have a copy of the DNA test, and even so, how could it help the family get visitation?

if the child now recieves SS wouldn't that prove already be an heir to the estate anyway? Without having to give a DNA test result to the wife?

maybe this should post to the wills and estate forum?

If the family could access the SS records (I don't know if they can or not) I suppose its possible that a judge might consider that sufficient proof of legal paternity. However the judge would definitely consider the DNA test as proof of legal paternity.

Proof of legal paternity is needed to give the grandparents standing to sue. Otherwise they cannot.

Mom has already voluntarily signed off on any rights to the estate, so that isn't an issue.

 

[Mommyof2Girls]

Actually, there could be a very sound reason why she should NOT provide them with a copy of the DNA test. Most state laws do not allow grandparents to sue for visitation in an unwed situation, unless paternity has been legally established. A parent passing away is grounds in ALL states with valid gpv statutes, for a grandparent to sue for visitation.

That DNA test legally establishes paternity since it was done for SS purposes.

Therefore, since she wishes to keep the family away, it would not be sound legal strategy to turn over the DNA test. In fact it might not even be wise for her to obtain her own copy. She can't turn over what she doesn't have.

This exactly why I don't want anyone to have a copy. My daughters grandmother is evil in its true form. She has even made a comment on how she is just waiting for the DNA test to come back. She has told everyone that I have no idea who my daughters father is and that is why I needed DNA. You would think that she would see what a blessing my child is, she is all that any of have left of him. That just isn't the case. She cant even address the baby by name, she calls her IT! She obviously cares nothing for my child but has told everyone that if the test comes back to show her son is the father she will make sure the baby knows the "truth" about her parents. Her idea of the truth is a bunch of lies she has made up in her own head. You wont believe the things she has done in the past. She damaged her own children I wont let her hurt mine.

I chose not to have a copy of the DNA test. I don't see why I need it since I know who my daughters father is. I just told them to send the copy to the lawyer so that she can take it to the judge.

I am truly hoping that since this is not an estate issue that the report will never have to be released to anyone. I am pretty sure that SS is not of public record. I think I would have to request of statement from them to show proof, I don't think just anyone can call and get it. Atleast that is how it worked for my sisters child that I am raising. My sister tried to obtain proof and they told her I had to call and ask for the copy, even though the SSI was drawn off of her, I am the legal guardian.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

And of course, not one of you has asked the relevant question. So, I'm going to put up my feet and wait....this stogie is tasting real good right about now...

 

[LdiJ]

This exactly why I don't want anyone to have a copy. My daughters grandmother is evil in its true form. She has even made a comment on how she is just waiting for the DNA test to come back. She has told everyone that I have no idea who my daughters father is and that is why I needed DNA. You would think that she would see what a blessing my child is, she is all that any of have left of him. That just isn't the case. She cant even address the baby by name, she calls her IT! She obviously cares nothing for my child but has told everyone that if the test comes back to show her son is the father she will make sure the baby knows the "truth" about her parents. Her idea of the truth is a bunch of lies she has made up in her own head. You wont believe the things she has done in the past. She damaged her own children I wont let her hurt mine.

I chose not to have a copy of the DNA test. I don't see why I need it since I know who my daughters father is. I just told them to send the copy to the lawyer so that she can take it to the judge.

I am truly hoping that since this is not an estate issue that the report will never have to be released to anyone. I am pretty sure that SS is not of public record. I think I would have to request of statement from them to show proof, I don't think just anyone can call and get it. Atleast that is how it worked for my sisters child that I am raising. My sister tried to obtain proof and they told her I had to call and ask for the copy, even though the SSI was drawn off of her, I am the legal guardian.

I would recommend simply ignoring the entire family. Don't answer their calls and don't return their messages. There is no guarantee that the grandparents won't initiate legal action at some point...however until/if that happens then deal with it then.

Realize though that a judge can make orders that would get the DNA information released eventually. However you certainly don't have to make it easy for them. That also doesn't guarantee that they could win a grandparent visitation case either. One important factor in a gpv case is that they have an established relationship with the child...which the obviously don't have.

 

[nextwife]

Does he have kids with the wife? If is reasonable for any children she has to at least know they have a sibling. It really bothers me that I have no idea if my daughter does or doesn't have bio-sibs "out there".

 

[LdiJ]

Does he have kids with the wife? If is reasonable for any children she has to at least know they have a sibling. It really bothers me that I have no idea if my daughter does or doesn't have bio-sibs "out there".

Good point, if there are siblings I would recommend encouraging contact between the child and the siblings.