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Can custody status be affected by new fiance

  • Thread starter Thread starter reg08
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reg08

Guest
We have a divorced couple of 2 years with 3 children with joint custody and the mother as the primary caregiver (father has unsupervised visits one day out the weekend and 2 weeks out the year). The father has remarried. The mother has a fiance who is an ex-offender who was convicted on adult rape charges. He was convicted of the crime (although innocent of it) when he was 21 years of age. He served 17 years and was released early for good behavior. He is scheduled to be on the "sex offender" list for another six years (for a total of a 10 year period). Since his release in 2001, he has been an upstanding member of the community, has gotten into no legal problems, and has maintained steady, gainful employment. The children in no way fear the fiance and he has never done anything sexually questionable to them.

The question: If the mother marries the fiance, is she jeopardizing her primary custodianship just because he is an ex-offender.
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
It's certainly possible. I can tell you that I wouldn't be amused to have my kids living with a sex offender and would do everythign possible to have them removed from the situation. If you're Dad - go speak with a local attorney. If you're Mom - go speak with a local attorney and have a serious think whether your b/f is worth potentially losing your kids over.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I agree vigorously with Stealth. I would leave no legal stone unturned, and perhaps other types of stones, to prevent my children from that situation. Period.

[Oh, and Stealth? I'm betting it's mom typing, or someone on her behalf. ;) ]
 
R

reg08

Guest
What about not living together?

Thank you for your quick response! What do you think if they postponed their marriage and did not live together. Is that still grounds to contest the custody?
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
Let me put it more strongly: I would do whatever I could to prevent ANY contact between my children and the freaky-deaky-dude.
(edited for clarity)
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
reg08 said:
Thank you for your quick response! What do you think if they postponed their marriage and did not live together. Is that still grounds to contest the custody?

Ditto Plum. I would not consider it worth the risk to have my children in any contact with a sex offender. The only thing that would keep me from trying to find a way to remove the children would be if Mom had an epiphany and tossed the guy to the curb. "Postpone" their wedding? For what? 6 months? A year? So Daddy could get more "comfortable" with a SEX OFFENDER AROUND HIS KIDS?

Let me amend my earlier thoughts. Mom should go have her head examined.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
AND I'd go for supervised visitation...because Mom can't be trusted by herself to make wise decisions on behalf of the kid/s and she does not take the sex offender status seriously. :eek:
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Honestly, these situations make me crazy. Who in their right mind would even risk their kid like this?
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I'm glad you found the news link...I was just going to go looking for it. Makes me nutso, too.

This may be TMI, but I have **never** had sex that was SO OUTLANDISHLY GOOD that I would endanger my children for the ongoing opportunity to have more good sex...with a child sex offender.

I'm assuming it's sex, because how could it be shining character? Excellent conversation? Admirable and/or heroic knight? I could keep going... :confused:
 

mom2J

Member
reg08 said:
The mother has a fiance who is an ex-offender who was convicted on adult rape charges. He was convicted of the crime (although innocent of it) when he was 21 years of age. He served 17 years and was released early for good behavior.

Now if that isn't the oldest story in the book, that someone in/out of prison, says there "innocent"???? :rolleyes: Haven't you realized that most sex offenders are not only smooth talkers, but are extremely polite, well-mannered and are law abiding citizens, "WHEN NOT BEING SEXUAL PREDATORS"???

reg08 said:
The question: If the mother marries the fiance, is she jeopardizing her primary custodianship just because he is an ex-offender.

Not only yes, but HELL YES!!! I hope the father sues for full legal/physical custody and wins. If the mother thinks a sex offender is the correct role-model for their children, she really is mentally unstable.

Ron, I couldn't have said it better myself.
 

casa

Senior Member
reg08 said:
We have a divorced couple of 2 years with 3 children with joint custody and the mother as the primary caregiver (father has unsupervised visits one day out the weekend and 2 weeks out the year). The father has remarried. The mother has a fiance who is an ex-offender who was convicted on adult rape charges. He was convicted of the crime (although innocent of it) when he was 21 years of age. He served 17 years and was released early for good behavior. He is scheduled to be on the "sex offender" list for another six years (for a total of a 10 year period). Since his release in 2001, he has been an upstanding member of the community, has gotten into no legal problems, and has maintained steady, gainful employment. The children in no way fear the fiance and he has never done anything sexually questionable to them.

The question: If the mother marries the fiance, is she jeopardizing her primary custodianship just because he is an ex-offender.

Legally a parent can petition to change custody if they can even document other parent even socializes with sex offenders.

There are just TOO MANY men in the world to 'settle' on this loser.

If I were the other parent in this scenario~ I would make it my MISSION in life to remove these children from the custody of the parent engaged to the sex offender (or even dating or befriending the sex offender).
 

Boyington

Junior Member
I would think that if the mother is just found to knowingly have the children around a previously convicted sex offender it could be used as reason for a change in custody. If a previously convicted sex offender was known to live in the mother's home or ever be alone with the children (even if the mother is upstairs and the convicted was downstairs with the children) I would think it could be viewed as grounds for termination of visitations, supervised visitations, or only visitations in which the convicted will not be around the children.

I would think that a Judge would have to take a change of custody into consideration simply if a convicted sex offender moved in next door to the mother, the father did not live near any known convicted sex offender, there was no reason for the father to be viweed as an unfit parent, and the mother was unwilling to relocate.

I am definately not a legal expert..it's just easy to tell from the media/news that things such as this are taken very serriously. I would think that a judge would be very cautious about giving consent or ordering for children to spend time in the home of a sex offender or time around a convicted sex offender. I would think a judge would also have to think of what would happen to him pubically if he did consent to the children being around a conviced sex offender and something ever did happen to the children.

I would be very very careful. I would think if a convicted sex offender gave a child a pat on the butt while playing back yard football it could easily be concieved as automatically having a very different meaning than if the person was not a previously convicted sex offender.

I would think his case would be reviewed and a judge could possibly take into consideration the act he was convicted of, and any counseling records. Are there any counselors that are willing to testify that this man does not mentally or emotionally fit any defination of a sex offender? Was he accused of whatever act he was convicted of by another person with a questionable past? Has the person who accused him gone on to accuse several others of similar things? What evidence was there that led to his conviction? Did the father know that this person was a convicted sex offender and did not have any complaints about the children being around this person until he knew you were getting married? Did the father initially think this person was wrongly convicted and had no problem with the children being around this person at that time, but now has a problem with it because 'iffy' things have occured and he no longer believes this person was innoscent?

No need to answer any of the questions for me..they were just things for you to think about. And for all I know I could be very wrong.
 

BethM

Member
This is what cracks me up. States have sex offender registries so that people who live near these people can be aware of it and take messures to protect themselves. In other words idiot politicians who make these laws are smart enough to know that these are people that the general population should be protected from and here we have a mother who is stupid enough to invite one into her home around her children.

Hell lady, you got any daughters? Why not just serve them up to this guy on a silver platter if they mean so little to you?

Here is a link www.match.com...use it and next time around be a little pickier about what you settle for.
 

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