Can I terminate my daughter's bio father's rights? I'm in Oregon.

[aleasha8502]

The name change.

I only had to post on the courthouse bulletin board for 2 weeks (I think) before the hearing date and then again for another 2 weeks after the order was signed. It might have been 4 weeks each, I'm not certain.

 

[aleasha8502]

Despite opinions on my choice to tell or not tell my daughter who her bio father is, is there anything legal I can do to prevent him from coming into her life after HE CHOOSE to leave it? I know he will just do a back and forth thing. He is unemployed, no driver's license, no education, with 4 other children, 2 of which he is ordered to pay child support on and doesn't and 2 of which he walked out on long before we even met, that if I had known about, I wouldn't have even dated him. There is no way should he by some slim chance choose to walk back in, that he would be able to maintain a consistent relationship with her. I live in Oregon and he lives in Virginia. She's too young to fly alone and even then it's expensive. He wouldn't be able to see her very often, even if we shared the cost. Cost is not the issue here in my opinion. It's more looking to protect my daughter and her peace of mind that she has a stable family.

 

[Silverplum]

Despite opinions on my choice to tell or not tell my daughter who her bio father is,

We do have opinions.

is there anything legal I can do to prevent him from coming into her life after HE CHOOSE to leave it? I know he will just do a back and forth thing. He is unemployed, no driver's license, no education, with 4 other children, 2 of which he is ordered to pay child support on and doesn't and 2 of which he walked out on long before we even met, that if I had known about, I wouldn't have even dated him. There is no way should he by some slim chance choose to walk back in, that he would be able to maintain a consistent relationship with her. I live in Oregon and he lives in Virginia. She's too young to fly alone and even then it's expensive. He wouldn't be able to see her very often, even if we shared the cost. Cost is not the issue here in my opinion. It's more looking to protect my daughter and her peace of mind that she has a stable family.

Hire. An. Attorney.

But you've already been told that.

 

[Zigner]

Despite opinions on my choice to tell or not tell my daughter who her bio father is, is there anything legal I can do to prevent him from coming into her life after HE CHOOSE to leave it? I know he will just do a back and forth thing. He is unemployed, no driver's license, no education, with 4 other children, 2 of which he is ordered to pay child support on and doesn't and 2 of which he walked out on long before we even met, that if I had known about, I wouldn't have even dated him. There is no way should he by some slim chance choose to walk back in, that he would be able to maintain a consistent relationship with her. I live in Oregon and he lives in Virginia. She's too young to fly alone and even then it's expensive. He wouldn't be able to see her very often, even if we shared the cost. Cost is not the issue here in my opinion. It's more looking to protect my daughter and her peace of mind that she has a stable family.

You sure have a great choice in bed-partners

In any case, it would seem that the name change, while slimy, was legal.

As for the adoption...if he adopts before you are married, then HE will be the only parent the child has.

 

[mistoffolees]

Despite opinions on my choice to tell or not tell my daughter who her bio father is, is there anything legal I can do to prevent him from coming into her life after HE CHOOSE to leave it? I know he will just do a back and forth thing. He is unemployed, no driver's license, no education, with 4 other children, 2 of which he is ordered to pay child support on and doesn't and 2 of which he walked out on long before we even met, that if I had known about, I wouldn't have even dated him. There is no way should he by some slim chance choose to walk back in, that he would be able to maintain a consistent relationship with her. I live in Oregon and he lives in Virginia. She's too young to fly alone and even then it's expensive. He wouldn't be able to see her very often, even if we shared the cost. Cost is not the issue here in my opinion. It's more looking to protect my daughter and her peace of mind that she has a stable family.

Hint: lying to a child is not usually the best way to protect their peace of mind. They should be able to TRUST you, not have to worry about how much of what you tell them is a lie.

Other than that, you've already received the legal advice you requested.

 

[LdiJ]

I chose for her to have his last name so they will have a connection until he can legally adopt her. He has chosen to be her dad. It's just not legal yet and if something happens down the road and we split, he will still be there as her dad for her. It would be better for all involved if he can legally adopt her. You seem to know a bit more about the situation than the others who responded. Are there any options for us without getting married? Any form of adoption or even just a way to make him a legal guardian with me? I have done some research and it seems like we qualify for second parent adoption. If I am required to notify her bio dad even though like you said he has abandoned her, I have no problems doing so.

I know that there are at least a handful of states that allow for a second parent adoption, because otherwise Brad Pitt could not have adopted Angelina Jolie's children that she had prior to their marriage. I would consult a local adoption attorney. You are going to need an attorney anyway, because an adoption is never a DIY project.

However, in the majority of states your boyfriend would not be able to adopt unless you and he were married for a while first.

 

[aleasha8502]

I know that there are at least a handful of states that allow for a second parent adoption, because otherwise Brad Pitt could not have adopted Angelina Jolie's children that she had prior to their marriage. I would consult a local adoption attorney. You are going to need an attorney anyway, because an adoption is never a DIY project.

However, in the majority of states your boyfriend would not be able to adopt unless you and he were married for a while first.

Thank you! I pretty much already got that but your answer was straight to the point and did not try to make me feel like a bad mom because of how I have chosen to handle my situation. I will consult with an attorney to determine what options I have and where to go from here.

 

[Silverplum]

Thank you! I pretty much already got that but your answer was straight to the point and did not try to make me feel like a bad mom because of how I have chosen to handle my situation. I will consult with an attorney to determine what options I have and where to go from here.

I so do hope that your attorney is a darling and filled with hope and light, who does not make you feel like a liar who makes poor choices.

 

[Ohiogal]

I know that there are at least a handful of states that allow for a second parent adoption, because otherwise Brad Pitt could not have adopted Angelina Jolie's children that she had prior to their marriage. I would consult a local adoption attorney. You are going to need an attorney anyway, because an adoption is never a DIY project.

However, in the majority of states your boyfriend would not be able to adopt unless you and he were married for a while first.

Regarding the bolded:
Brad Pitt to Adopt Angelina's Kids - Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt : People.com
A legal petition to change the names of the children to Zahara Jolie-Pitt and Maddox Jolie-Pitt was filed in Los Angeles, according to publicist Cindy Guagenti.

So he adopted, huh? Name change is SO MUCH different than adoption. Unless of course you think they are equal.
What PROOF do you have that HE ADOPTED the children and did not just do a NAME change? Probably none. The name change was granted. I will wait for proof that he ADOPTED (with court documents because the media -- yeah, they are constantly WRONG with interpreting legal documents).

 

[LdiJ]

Regarding the bolded:
Brad Pitt to Adopt Angelina's Kids - Angelina Jolie, Brad Pitt : People.com
A legal petition to change the names of the children to Zahara Jolie-Pitt and Maddox Jolie-Pitt was filed in Los Angeles, according to publicist Cindy Guagenti.

So he adopted, huh? Name change is SO MUCH different than adoption. Unless of course you think they are equal.
What PROOF do you have that HE ADOPTED the children and did not just do a NAME change? Probably none. The name change was granted. I will wait for proof that he ADOPTED (with court documents because the media -- yeah, they are constantly WRONG with interpreting legal documents).

I read that they changed the children's names first, and that the adoption happened later.

There are many articles that stated that he did adopt the Zahara and Maddox.

 

[ecmst12]

That doesn't mean it's true.