can't find deadbeat dad

[CO19]

I do not recieve any assistance from anyone!!!!! I have contacted North Carolina and they advised me that since this case originated in Florida, basically it was going to stay here.

I would have originally suggested that you retain a PI in NC to follow the guy for a week or so to get vehicle info, home info, work info, and poss bank info. However, you stated in original post that you "can't afford to pay someone to track him down", which is what you need, and what PI's do, but without any money, you are limited in your options. There is no free ride in collecting child support... it costs and costs can be hefty. Speaking of his family, where's yours?

 

[justmom611]

My ex owes me more than $40,000.00 in arrears for one child. He didn't work, hid out, didn't own anything (the could be attached). His family refused to tell me where he was. I have never received public assistance so I opened my own case with the DCSS. They tried to serve him and never could. I used to get very frustrated with the situation because I needed the money so badly. My caseworker just said she was sorry but they couldn't take what he didn't have. The DCSS did put liens on my ex's parents and grandparents houses, so if he should ever inherit anything from them, the money would come to us first.

We have had to struggle to get by, but I went on with my life and let it go. I know it's not fair but there isn't much you can do if your ex has no money and 7 kids. Now I just think of it as a bonus for my child, if some day his father ever comes into money my son will get a big check. My ex has since had another child with another woman that he also doesn't support and she has her own case open in her county.

I definately understand how you feel.

 

[IrishLady47]

I have contacted North Carolina and they advised me that since this case originated in Florida, basically it was going to stay here. ....... If anyone has anythng constructive that I could try, I would appreciate the info. The other people who just want to act like I am looking for a handout, please go find someone else to irritate.

Well, I must admit this thread got way out there. However, it would help to ask in a constructive manner if you wish constructive advice. Such as - my ex-husband is $15,000 behind in child support. I believe he is in NC but works "under the table" and I don't have an exact address. I do not have funds to hire a attorney or private investigator. What steps can I take to try and get my child support order enforced?

Instead of "This is, from what I understand, his 7th child. He doens't take care of any of them. Of course being a single mom, I can't afford to pay someone to track him down. Aren't there any Government agencies that do this? Why does it seem like they would rather all of us be on welfare than permanently stop this "man" from having anymore children!"

And, you were given good advice - contact CSE (your local one, not NC--and I bet NC told you that) and then continue on the best you can, thinking of yourself and your children, don't count on help from him, not worth worrying about.

Instead you make a ridiculous statement implying the Government wants "us" on welfare and your ex should be sterilized. You got what you asked for, you ranted and received rants in return.

Regardless, I been where you at and know how hard it is. Wish you the best. But, believe me, letting go of the anger, no matter how justified it is, will only benefit you.

 

[betterthanher]

The DCSS did put liens on my ex's parents and grandparents houses, so if he should ever inherit anything from them, the money would come to us first.

How did they legally do this? It's not their debt.

 

[trustknow1]

Well, unfortunately, you have to pick your battles in life. I try and make all of my decisions according to percentages. The less emotion fueling a decision, the better the chances of success in my opinion. I mean if I was crossing the street and a car is coming; I might have a 70% chance of making it to the other side if I run across before the car passes, but a 99.9% chance if I wait until it passes. Which one would I pick? Is it worth trying to beat the car?

At best in this case, it seems to me success would be defined in terms of happiness, not money.

I think we would all agree that we do not need an accountant to estimate your potential monetary reward, even if you do find this loser, and everything goes smoothly in the process.

Yes, there are government agencies assigned to the process. Will they "help" you? Well, go down and spend an hour or two in a driver's license branch. Now, multiply that experience times a thousand. That is what the government agencies call "help". Is that what you are looking for?

OK, here is my opinion of your choices:

-you can go to a government agency (CSE)for help. Like everything else, they estimate their chances for success based on the info you supply. With thousands of cases, is yours going to be the one they place in the "best chance for success" pile to go after right away?

-you can contract a private "support collection specialist outfit" that will definitely find him for you.Their fee is based on payment of an agreed upon percentage of the total amount collected from your deadbeat ex. The percentage they take is high, too. Ok, same question again.... after you supply the facts on Mr. Loser, how excited do you think they will be to take your case? (reminder.....40% of $0.00 collected equals $0.00 fee payment for them).

-whatever method you choose, if you are successful in publicly exposing Mr Loser's location; he is now visible to the other "biologically interested" members of your "sorority team", who have the same monetary goal in mind as you do, right? (reminder.... $0.00 collected divided by the number of his other stranded victims comes out to $0.00 for each parties' share).

-Just because you are successful in "hunting him down", taking him to Court, and getting a judgement amount awarded, does not mean you will get the money. The court awards the judgement, but they do not cut you a check or collect it for you.You are then back where you started, if you are realistic about it.

-Or, let's take a different approach. The goal is to track him down, expose him for what he is, and make him admit to everyone what he has done, even if there is no money.

Do you actually think a guy that does this type of thing cares about ethics, morality, justice, and character issues? I doubt you would see any reaction from him that would make you feel any better.

So, what is left? You have no money to hire somebody to track down a deadbeat guy who has no money for you when you find him. In the process, you will devote even more of your time in life making yourself miserable tracking him down. It is not fair, right, justice, excusable, or any other description you choose to label the position he has placed you in. But, you also know that it is reality. You cannot go back and change the past, but you can start over and make and build a new ending.

I am not minimizing your unfortunate experience. I am just considering what you stand to gain or lose from going after him. The only choice I see is to continue being miserable making this guy part of your life; or forgetting this guy, and using that energy to work on making your life better on your own. It seems you would have better chances spending money earmarked for chasing him to buy lottery tickets.

Just a thought,

good luck

 

[justmom611]

How did they legally do this? It's not their debt.

No, it's not their debt but if they were to die and he were to inherit (which is likely what would happen) it puts a red flag that he owes and his inheritance would be attached. The DCSS faxed me copies of the liens as they show in thier computer system. It's my understanding that the liens do not affect the parents/grandparents if they were to sell their homes, only if he were to inherit anything from them. It just puts us first in line, rather than him getting a check. I do not know if this is a common practice in California. The DCSS just told me about it when they did it. I had never heard about it before.

 

[nextwife]

No, it's not their debt but if they were to die and he were to inherit (which is likely what would happen) it puts a red flag that he owes and his inheritance would be attached. The DCSS faxed me copies of the liens as they show in thier computer system. It's my understanding that the liens do not affect the parents/grandparents if they were to sell their homes, only if he were to inherit anything from them. It just puts us first in line, rather than him getting a check. I do not know if this is a common practice in California. The DCSS just told me about it when they did it. I had never heard about it before.

I have never heard of creditors going around liening the holdings of parties that have no obligation to the creditor, and owe no debt to the debtor, just because IF they predecease the NCP, and if they "will" something to their debtor, the lien will be there. So, the state is going around liening parents, grandparents, maybe siblings, significant others, aunt, uncles, because they will die someday and they are related to the debtor? I agree that sounds rather draconian. I certainly see liening an actual inheritance, but liening the property of a living person just because they are a relative of the debtor? It sure doesn't sound legal to me IF the NCP has no legal interest in the properties liened and there is no actual probate.

 

[justmom611]

I'm not sure, just repeating what I have been told. As I said, I had never heard of it either. I am looking at the documents....they have 2 separate entries, one for each property. It gives my ex's name, TYPE: R, the county number, ST: A, the APN of the properties, my DCSS case number and the original court case number. RESPONSE: Liens Recorded. I am certain that he does not have an interest in either property. He didn't at the time of our divorce and I doubt anyone would be stupid enough to add him to a deed, given the amount of money that he owes.

 

[nextwife]

Ok, I just ran this past a title insurance company attorney. Granted, he's not in CA, but he has NEVER heard of a lien that would ONLY apply in the event a particular debtor inherited from the owner (mind you, no probate, the owner of the RE is alive and well)- if the owner died still owning that property. Further, he stated it is illegal to deliberately cloud the title of someone when the debtor has absolutely no legal interest of any kind in the property.

 

[poeypooh]

To find his address and phone # you could try:
searchbug.com, reunion.com or classmates.com

These sites will give you the previous address listed for the person you are searching for and then you pay a minimal fee to get the full address and phone number. If you can find the city he is in then maybe information would have his phone number listed.(kind of doubt it though)

Or you could give the city info to DCSE and they should be able to track him from there. GOOD LUCK

 

[justmom611]

Ok, I just ran this past a title insurance company attorney. Granted, he's not in CA, but he has NEVER heard of a lien that would ONLY apply in the event a particular debtor inherited from the owner (mind you, no probate, the owner of the RE is alive and well)- if the owner died still owning that property. Further, he stated it is illegal to deliberately cloud the title of someone when the debtor has absolutely no legal interest of any kind in the property.

Hmm....I better ask the DCSS about this then. I assumed it was just another thing they did and didn't really give it a second thought. Thank you for checking into it.

 

[nextwife]

Hmm....I better ask the DCSS about this then. I assumed it was just another thing they did and didn't really give it a second thought. Thank you for checking into it.

I'd be curious to hear how they can do a "selective lien" that only applies to some potential future heir of a living owner. Think about the implications if CSE can go around clouding the titles of all the parties that have the POTENTIAL of leaving any inheritance to a NCP with an arrearage.

 

[45Frank]

A little experience, in NJ if you are to inherit anything the executor of a will has to sign a waiver that there is no CS (from surrogates office). If there is then CS gets first dibs. I don't know if this is the same but the papers came from the surogates office. If you lie and it's discovered the money will come from either the co. that you are bonded with or if there is property the title ins co.
This is from a lawyer who handles estates in NJ. I assume he is right because this is what had to be done.
I hope I posted this right and don't get beat up.
Good Luck

I'd be curious to hear how they can do a "selective lien" that only applies to some potential future heir of a living owner. Think about the implications if CSE can go around clouding the titles of all the parties that have the POTENTIAL of leaving any inheritance to a NCP with an arrearage.

 

[betterthanher]

To find his address and phone # you could try:
searchbug.com, reunion.com or classmates.com

These sites will give you the previous address listed for the person you are searching for and then you pay a minimal fee to get the full address and phone number. If you can find the city he is in then maybe information would have his phone number listed.(kind of doubt it though)

Or you could give the city info to DCSE and they should be able to track him from there. GOOD LUCK

These sites are not always correct. I have tried them out on just myself and family and rolled over in laughter and the locations I allegedly resided at. I was even listed at 3 different addresses on other parts of town at the same time!!
Also, IIRC I believe this poster doesn't have any info on the person to throughly research.

 

[betterthanher]

A little experience, in NJ if you are to inherit anything the executor of a will has to sign a waiver that there is no CS (from surrogates office).

How would they know he could inherit anything? Wouldn't they have to subpeoena or whatever the records of the relatives? I am not totally sure on all of this, but I question how they can put a lien on something you *might* inherit without really knowing (unless legal proceedings have already taken place).

The problem is, the OP doesn't even know for sure. The OP is going on what s/he's been told. And we all know how accurate the people at Support enforcement agencies are LOL.