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Chicken Pox in NCP home

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maryjo

Member
Just my two cents. I haven't read everything.

Just because one child has it doesn't mean all of them will. My stepson use to get strep 3-4 times a year. My daughter , me nor my husband ever got it from him and he lives with us. I took very good care not to spread it. In fact the first time My daughter got it was when she went to prek and someone in her class got it and I got it also . That was also the first time I had ever had it.

Also just because one child is sick doesn't mean dad won't get to spend time with the other kids or take them somewhere.


I have to agree with you. My mother and sister...always sick! To this day they both get seriously sick a few times a year. Me and my dad...almost never.

As for the chicken pox...we were immunized as babies. But my mother would take us around kids that had it so we would get it while we were little. It didnt happen.

I DID however...get it in the 7th grade. Not only was I seriously sick with it...but it was insanely embarrassing getting something in the 7th grade that usually small children get! :rolleyes:
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
I have to agree with you. My mother and sister...always sick! To this day they both get seriously sick a few times a year. Me and my dad...almost never.

As for the chicken pox...we were immunized as babies. But my mother would take us around kids that had it so we would get it while we were little. It didnt happen.

I DID however...get it in the 7th grade. Not only was I seriously sick with it...but it was insanely embarrassing getting something in the 7th grade that usually small children get! :rolleyes:

Really? How old are you? This vaccine was only recommended for use in the US in 1995.
 

Isis1

Senior Member
By "doing something" I have to infer you mean "going somewhere". Why do they have to go anywhere when with their Dad? Why can't they have a w/e at home? Playing games, watching movies, yakking, being silly, building blanket forts, etc, etc, etc? What's wrong with that?

because it's an awesome reason to say "no, you can't have the kids, you aren't good enough"

don'tcha think????
 

maryjo

Member
Really? How old are you? This vaccine was only recommended for use in the US in 1995.


Really??? Well..I was just going by what my mother told us. She SAID she got us immunized. Maybe she just thought she did. I do know we didnt get it until I was in 7th grade and my sister was in 6th. And it was horrible, horrible, horrible!!!

But I am 33.
 

peppier

Member
It sounds like you have been told by medical professionals that they should not go, try to get it in writing. I, myself would do as you say you have done, offer him make-up days and and then I'd keep them home.

Chicken Pox is not something to sneeze at, a percentage of the people who have them as children go on to have serious problems later in life. They would never have spent the money it takes on Research and Development to immunize if it wasn't a bad thing. I had them and I remember how miserable I was, my mother got them as an adult and almost died, my children never got them and my granddaughter still has some bad scars from them.

My children had the MMR and so did my friend's children but her children got the mumps anyway, my children were exposed at the same time and didn't. I wouldn't chance it, I'd chance a contempt charge.

Like the example of Strep throat, my brother and sister used to get it all the time, I never did. My grandson has it 4 or 5 times a year, no one in his family gets it, but if anyone in his school has it he gets it. One year he had it constantly and they found out there was an asymptomatic girl that he was close friends with that was constantly giving it to him. It was until she got Scarlett fever that the doctor figured it out. The problem with this anecdotal information is that you don't know beforehand who might be vulnerable, whose vaccination didn't take until it was too late.

As you see, this is not really good legal advice and you would be taking a chance of a contempt charge but in my NON-LEGAL opinion it would fall in "the best interests of the child".
 
I don't agree with sending them. My problem is there are other people at risk. What about the flight full of people that could be exposed? Dad chooses not to immunize...fine, that is his choice. But that doesn't mean a bunch of other people should be exposed to it that may not have been immunized. Just my opinion, but why can't Dad take two other days? Mom isn't trying to deny the child visiting with Dad, she is offering make up time.

At first, I thought that the other people that may be affected were irrelevent...but how can that be, when Dad's other children (irrelevent to their court order too) are the ones exposing the child (and other people) to this?

It is two days, for goodness sake. Why can't Dad compromise? Mom IS offering make up. The DOCTOR said not to send the child, why is everyone second guessing that?
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
I don't agree with sending them. My problem is there are other people at risk. What about the flight full of people that could be exposed? Dad chooses not to immunize...fine, that is his choice. But that doesn't mean a bunch of other people should be exposed to it that may not have been immunized. Just my opinion, but why can't Dad take two other days? Mom isn't trying to deny the child visiting with Dad, she is offering make up time.

At first, I thought that the other people that may be affected were irrelevent...but how can that be, when Dad's other children (irrelevent to their court order too) are the ones exposing the child (and other people) to this?

It is two days, for goodness sake. Why can't Dad compromise? Mom IS offering make up. The DOCTOR said not to send the child, why is everyone second guessing that?

Is the flipping Doctor going to deal with the legal repercussions for the UNJUSTIFIABLE denial of visitation? And where did Mom say the children were going to fly?
 
"I have my two step kids here until Wed when they leave to go back to their mom's (on a plane) and getting ready for school to start next week. I am pretty sure they have been immunized as well. My current husband is not sure if he has had the chicken pox.

I told dad that it is a risk. I can't put two kids with chicken pox on a plane if they got it. I don't want to give my kids an illness that could be avoided. I can give him two other days (whenever he wants) to make up for time. I called peds office...they said do not send them. I called nurse line they said do not send them. Dad is still saying he wants the kids. "

That is what she said. It is the stepkids going on the plane. I realize this is all about "ifs", but wouldn't the judge consider the doctor's recommendation and the fact that she offered make up time?

This is all so stupid. Why can't parents just coparent? If our daughter was sick, I always offered my ex the option of not taking her, and he would not, since he didn't want to expose his kids. In turn, if he had kids sick, he would warn me and suggest we switch weekends. And we don't really like each other. We just both take into consideration BEST INTEREST, like two adults are supposed to.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I don't agree with sending them. My problem is there are other people at risk. What about the flight full of people that could be exposed? Dad chooses not to immunize...fine, that is his choice. But that doesn't mean a bunch of other people should be exposed to it that may not have been immunized. Just my opinion, but why can't Dad take two other days? Mom isn't trying to deny the child visiting with Dad, she is offering make up time.

At first, I thought that the other people that may be affected were irrelevent...but how can that be, when Dad's other children (irrelevent to their court order too) are the ones exposing the child (and other people) to this?

It is two days, for goodness sake. Why can't Dad compromise? Mom IS offering make up. The DOCTOR said not to send the child, why is everyone second guessing that?

Because you never know how a judge is going to rule on something like this, and the risk factors are low.
 

wileybunch

Senior Member
Oh yes I am fully aware of the low percentage of them getting it, but 1-4% is not 0% and the doctors office specifically said do not send them (legally I know they can't do that), but they said it was a risk be it a small one.
The *office* said that? Would that be the floor, the walls, or the chairs? :p So this wasn't even the DOCTOR that told you this, was it? Nevertheless, your kids have ALREADY been immunized against chicken pox. Even though the chance is not 0% they will never actually get it, if they do, it's supposed to be much less of a case than otherwise. And, you haven't stated any special health concerns why your children would be so much at risk in particular. Drop it.
 

swtwilma

Member
Awesome replies just wanted to update all of you.

I spoke with dad and he spoke with his doc as well. We all know the risk is low, but that really isn't the point.

The one point I do wish to make is this...co parent. The one and only good part of divorce. I love the fact that if I am sick I can call dad and he can have the kids to keep them away from my sickness, a luxury that non-divorced familys do not have.

Unfortunatly to reply to dad can do stuff at home with kids, not in this instance. Dad has 3 other children (one sick) and step mommy is sick as well. I don't expect fun to be paying to go out and do something. I was actually offering to offset his load for one day on top of keeping the kids out of the sick house. I guess I am different because I will always offer to help them out.

I sent the kids, since he didn't want to have them another time and that is our parenting plan. Sure enough though, just one hour ago he called and told me to come and get them since it was too hard to deal with two sick kids and a sick wife.

Either way, he is making good with me these days and calling when he can't make it work. Horray for co-parenting.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
Now that saved a whole lot of arguing and you let him decide how to parent and when enough is enough.

Good for you for doing the right thing and it looks like dad took that and also did the right thing by calling you if it wasn't working instead of just making the kids suffer. Trust each other to make the right choices.

Happily cosigned!
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Now that saved a whole lot of arguing and you let him decide how to parent and when enough is enough.

Good for you for doing the right thing and it looks like dad took that and also did the right thing by calling you if it wasn't working instead of just making the kids suffer. Trust each other to make the right choices.

Or at least trust each other to recognize when you have made wrong initial choices...LOL.
 

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