Children in the courtroom?

[Teggie]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Texas

Just had two questions please if anyone can help. I have a court date Monday in which my ex-husband is suing to get primary custody of my two girls. The case Monday is for temporary orders. I am currently the primary custodial parant.

Question 1: My exhusband wants our 13 year old daughter to accompany him to court. He has made the statement he will take her with him whether I agree or not. To my knowledge it has not been mandated by the court that the children be present at this case. I disagree with her coming, I don't feel it is appropiate for her to witness her parants pitting againest each other about who is the better parant and why. I feel it would be disturbing and upsetting to her. If the court specifically asked for thier prescense then I would comply, but they have not as far as I know. Can he do this?

Question 2: According to the petition I was served my 13 yr old has evidently signed a paper at her dads lawyer's stating she wants to live with him. Her dad told her not to tell me, I only found out she had after I consulted an attorney. I was never notified that this had been done. Was I supposed to be notified of this?

I apologize asking these here. My original date was rescheduled because of a death in my family, my ex's attorny did not notify me of the reschedule date.like he said he would. I finally was able to find an affordable attorney a few days ago, after consulting with 5 or so, and we have had little time to prepare. It is currently the weekend and I cannot consult these questions to my attorny at this time.

Thanks for any replies.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Texas

Just had two questions please if anyone can help. I have a court date Monday in which my ex-husband is suing to get primary custody of my two girls. The case Monday is for temporary orders. I am currently the primary custodial parant.

Question 1: My exhusband wants our 13 year old daughter to accompany him to court. He has made the statement he will take her with him whether I agree or not. To my knowledge it has not been mandated by the court that the children be present at this case. I disagree with her coming, I don't feel it is appropiate for her to witness her parants pitting againest each other about who is the better parant and why. I feel it would be disturbing and upsetting to her. If the court specifically asked for thier prescense then I would comply, but they have not as far as I know. Can he do this?

Question 2: According to the petition I was served my 13 yr old has evidently signed a paper at her dads lawyer's stating she wants to live with him. Her dad told her not to tell me, I only found out she had after I consulted an attorney. I was never notified that this had been done. Was I supposed to be notified of this?

I apologize asking these here. My original date was rescheduled because of a death in my family, my ex's attorny did not notify me of the reschedule date.like he said he would. I finally was able to find an affordable attorney a few days ago, after consulting with 5 or so, and we have had little time to prepare. It is currently the weekend and I cannot consult these questions to my attorny at this time.

Thanks for any replies.

I doubt that the judge will allow your daughter to remain in the courtroom even if her father brings her. She might be allowed to speak to the judge in chambers. However, tell your attorney when you get to court to ask the judge to remove her from the courtroom, for just the reasons you mentioned.

 

[BL]

I'm sure your attorney will talk to you before court begins, and if the daughter is there, your attorney should bring it to the Judge's attention.

It would be up to the Judge to allow the 13 yr. old to stay, or not,and possibly be heard. If the Judge does not want the 13 yr. old in the court room , he/she will deal with it.

As far as your daughter signing a paper, the statement could be included into evidence , and court papers .

And no, you would not have had to be informed.

Again talk about the issues to your attorney before court starts, even if you have to whisper them real quick, your attorney can ask the Judge for a quick moment PLEASE .

 

[Teggie]

Well my 13 yr old decided she didn't want to go unless she was asked to by the judge and told her father so. She stayed with my mother and her siblings while we went to court. They were close by though, in case the judge did decide to talk to her. My attorny argued for a continuance since I was not notified of the the rescheduled date until 2 working days before the trial when I called my ex's attorny's office and demanded to be told something. The judge agreed. My ex and his family were not happy about that at all. The CPS worker who came and visited me 3 days after I was served papers is now being served to testify at the trial in my behalf. I have charecter witness's arranged and hopefully have my bases covered. I am hopeful that the temp orders go in my favor, my side of the street is clean and the outlook looks good. Does the parant who gets the temp ruling usually wind up favorable for the actual case? I am hopeful that the ex will decide to not persue it further after the temp hearing if it is ruled in my favor. If he doesn't, what should I expect at the actual case? I have told my attorny I am open to some type of out of court agreement such as changing vistation frequencies or times. I don't want to keep him from his daughters lives, I just want him to abide by whatever visitation orders are in force. It all started after I requested the court mandated visitation times be utilized related to his refusing to bring the girls home after a visit if I was working and picking them up without my knowledge. Thanks for the replies I recieved, they were much appreciated.

 

[Teggie]

Even with the best intentions

Well, I'm certainly alot smarter legal wise than I used to be. It's been a very long hard road. Finally had the temporary orders hearing Tuesday. The case took over 4 hours, with the judge talking to my 13 yr old before the case started and before the case ended. It was undoubtedly the worst experience in my life. I can honestly say my husband and I went in and told nothing but the truth. The CPS worker that had visited us after we were acused of abusing and neglecting our children and being drug users testified that she saw no evidence of that in our home. Honesty is not how I would describe my ex right now however, I was shocked at the lows he would stoop to in his quest to make us look like unfit parants. At the end of the case the judge tells us he has to think on it overnight and will decide in the am. So another restless night spent waiting. We finally heard Wens afternoon at 5 pm. The judge said he had no cause to remove the 6 yr old from my custody, that he felt our home was safe and we were adequate parants. He said he was going to allow my ex to have custody of the 13 yr old during the temp order period, not because we were deemed inadequate, he said only because she signed an affadavit stating her father as her preference and verbally told the judge so, the reason for the delay was his dilemma about whether to seperate the siblings or not.

I partially expected it, but it still hurt like hell to hear it. Now I have to help my daughter pack her things so she can live with her dad, and hearing my 6 yr old cry when she came home from visitation with her dad and the 13 yr old didn't come back home with her. I'm fairly certain my 13 yr olds motives are to do what she wants and see her boyfriend more often that her dad takes her to see. The one I have not allowed her to see because I felt she is too young for a romantic relationship, a long distance one at that. I am terrified she will wind up pregnant in a year.

So now visitation has to be revamped to accomadate visitation of both girls with each parant and with each other. And the final hearing in a couple of monthes or so, I dread to think what that will entail, I already owe my soul to the lawyer. But I try to look at the brighter side, I didn't lose both of them, and maybye its a good thing for my ex to see what raising a teenage girl is like and my 13 yr old to see that maybye the grass isn't greener on the other side.

Just goes to show you can do your very best and it still may not be enough. Good luck everyone and thanks for all the advice I have received.

Teggie