Dad with full custody need advice

[Jillian483]

Would her moving back to Ohio be significant enough to warrant a change in custody?

i don't think so

 

[backwardsrain]

I feel that all the replies you have received are genuinely supportive. The only problem here is most replies compare to the poster's experiences and unfortunately most all would not help you because of the state laws. I feel that you know that the mother of your children would not provide child support because she has mastered the 'dodge' of the system in gaining assistance
she is not entitled to. To me, I feel that you should keep your children safe with you as you know firsthand what this woman has done to you and the children and what she is capable of. You asked if you should leave well enough alone basically as to not open the 'pandora's box'... I think you know in your heart that is exactly right, don't even try. If you're lucky she will work at some time and you will hopefully receive her fed taxes, unfortunately with her track record, that's about it. If you choose to pursue
a lawyer, the money you would pay just in retainer fees would far exceed any gain to minutely cover your day to day costs for your children. If it has been a year that she abandoned you and the children, the most I would do is use Child Support Enforcement a free state by state program to put you
in 'the pot' for possible wage withholdings. Good luck to YOU~

Thank you for the shoot from the hip response.
Your right it will cost me 900 just to file for the support order. I doute I will see $900 from her in 9 years hehe..

Here is something I didn't think of.... If she is let's say 10 grand behind in child support. Will that make it less likely that she will be able to get custody? I know that the rule is that child support has nothing to due with custody meaning you can not keep a person from seeing his or her kids if they owe back child support, but won't it look to the court that she can not even be responsible enough to pay for 40% of expenses let alone 60%?

It seems that the child support calculators calculate that CP's are responsible for 60% of support and Non-CP's are 40%. So how do you think it will sway a court that mom never pay's any ordered support?? Is that reason enough to go after support will this be a negitive factor against her? Or will it have no bearing on a future custody case?

Thanks

 

[backwardsrain]

I am going through a Custody Mod right now... I have opened up "Pandora's Box" fully and am regretting it to some degree.

Even if you take her back to court for CS... say they order her to pay on her old wage... do you think she is going to pay it? She hasn't tried to visit your 3 children for how long? Yes, it will be documented that she is required to pay... yes, she will go into arrearages...yes, she may have her driver's license suspended and serve some jail time but in the end you will be lucky to get a dime from her.

Do you have family support where maybe one of your family members can help in child care so you don't have to pay full tuition? I'm just trying to suggest some different avenues then Pandora's Box.

I was told I didn't have to take her to court I only have to file a form to change the child support order from 0 to the new amount based on her wages from the last 12 months (8.45 hour)

Not sure.... hmmm

 

[stealth2]

You're operating under some misconceptions, OP. For starters, OH uses an income share model for calculation of child support. That means that the income of both parents is used in calculating the support obligation. How that works is the total combined income is used to calculate the support obligation (and I'm not sure what the percentages are for 3 kids). Then that figure is split proportionally. So, if one parent is making $40k and the other is making $20k, the parent with the higher income is responsible for 2/3's of the support - whether that is the CP or the NCP, male or female. So, supposing the support figure is $1200/mo and the CP makes the higher income. The NCP would still be required to pay $400/mo. There are other factors that typically factor into the calculation - amount of time with the NCP, for example.

OH does also provide a credit for childcare needs, insurance premiums, and support obligations for other bio children (outgoing OR incoming).

Personally, considering that the children have been with you for nearly a year, the likelihood of a judge changing custody is low. Judges don't like to disrupt an existing living arrangement unless there is a good reason (the kids are being abused, neglected, etc). However, noone can guarantee that it won't happen. Only you can decide (preferably with the advice of an attorney who knows all of the facts) what your best course of action might be.