Need to elaborate on what the bigger issues are. I've been wondering about all of the uncovered medical, dental, and ortho expenses. My ex carries no coverage on the girls. Everyone tells me that he should be paying his part. Whether that is half of the uncovered amounts, or the extra amount in premiums, I don't know. Because there wouldn't be any increase in premium as he has family coverage for myself and our son.
A: If it's not in the order, he doesn't need to do it.
There also needs to be addressed the issue as to what time he's to come pick them up for weekends and bring them home. He has always picked them up after work on Fridays. By the time he could get here, it's usually 7PM. Lately he'll call at 4:30 or so and say he's about 20 minutes away. It's a 1 1/2 hour drive.I don't have an issue with him being earlier, I would like to be notified a little sooner. I've had to cancel appointments, pick them up early from their friends houses, rush getting them fed, etc. All because he shows up early on a whim. I can hear it now, let him feed them. If I thought he'd show up with money to feed them, no problem. He has had to borrow .50 from one of them before to pay the toll because he forgot to bring cash. I've offered to give him money to stop and buy them all dinner , his included, but he's refused saying they can just eat when they get to his house. He's pretty good at bringing them come close to the time we agreed on, but on occasion has been known to bring them home a couple of hours late because he had to wait for his girlfriend to get to his house because she was coming with them. Or because "the game wasn't over yet". That's fine, but call and let me know if they'll be that late. I shouldn't have to call wondering why they aren't home yet.
A: If you're willing to step in and take care of the things that he "forgets", then that's on you. Your kids aren't going to die if they eat an hour later than they're used to. They might whine enough that he remembers his wallet next time.
The issue of him taking our girls to bars with him until 1 AM to watch his band play is a problem but I can't figure how to address in a way he'll get. He says his time is his time, but when the girls tell me they hid in a restroom all night, that makes me furious and want to keep this from happening again. I would like to be able to make him leave them with my parents, who live less than 5 minutes from him, instead of having them in a bar until God knows how late.
A: It's his time. As long as they are not endangered, you have no say in how he spends it. LOL Most CPs would bitch that he's leaving them with your parents on his time so he can go play in some bar. No win situation.
During the summer he informs me two or three days before he wants them for his weeks with them. And then throws a fit if we've already got something scheduled. I would like to have more notice there, too. And if his doesn't provide it in acretain time frame before, then he's SOL.
Mostly, just the issues that seem to be covered in most agreements. But, were never thought of at the time or divorce.
A: Then file for a modification.